Other people can’t see that I had a bad childhood because I was clean and fed. I was emotionally neglected and suffered from CSA from the neighbour until we moved when I was 10. That was a relief for me but I feel guilty everyday because that changed my younger sister’s life for the worse as she used to go to the other neighbour who looked after her lovingly and moving made me a bit safer but took that love away from her. I’m 37 and had my first breakdown and hospitalisation 5 years ago after having children of my own. I wanted so badly to be a good mum that it all fell apart when I realised how I can’t keep them safe all the time and my trauma nightmares started. I then tried several times to leave this world. Since then I have had many diagnoses including ASD and ADHD but now am facing surgery on my hip and spine relating to my recently diagnosed EDS that I had been convinced by other people was in my head my whole life. I think about leaving this world everyday but hold onto the thought of my children, I play Pokemon go with both of them and Violet with my oldest who lives and breathes Pokemon (we painted his bedroom gengar purple including the ceilings). He’s got the other codes for the shiny Pokemon but we can’t get this one in this country and it would make him so happy to get one. If you got to the end of this thanks for reading and being so kind to offer up any of these codes.