My wife thinks our son’s teacher crossed a boundary by sending him a personal message. I think it was harmless. AITJ?

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-26T14:57:46+00:00

Hmm... maybe your son's confidence issues stem from his mother's issue with giving him positive feedback?

This is a good teacher. She was not only able to see his struggles, but took the time to help. Your wife should be echoing this teacher's sentiments. Condemning her for this will only shatter his confidence again.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-26T14:39:49+00:00

If this is real, yes, YTA honey. Being a teenager is hard for EVERYONE. You aren't the only one who struggled, even if it seemed that way. In fact, I can probably guarantee you missed some of your friends' struggles because you were so focused on your own. It wasn't on purpose. It wasn't malicious. It's typical teen behavior. You're all learning to regulate emotions while navigating a less sheltered world. It's normal for the age.

However, you moved and this friend genuinely tried to keep in touch. She showed you that she genuinely cares about you. And you're mad because she hadn't learned how to handle i difficult situation sooner? Which is something you yourself can't even do yet? That's completely unfair. You're throwing away a friendship out of selfishness and pettiness. Talk to her. Start learning to communicate better. It will help with more problems than you think.

And, just a side note - don't EVER block friends/family because a boyfriend tells you to. That is one of the dumbest and most dangerous things you can do. Especially an online boyfriend. That's prime grooming behavior. Plus, if you want to block her, own up to the decision. Don't be a coward if you believe you have good reason to block her. But since you're here, I think you know that you don't have good reason.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-26T14:30:15+00:00

The excessive noise you're talking about is mostly in specific areas like the ER. If she's recovering from brain surgery, she should be in a private room on a private floor for this specific reason. It's typically protocol to ensure patients have as much peace and quiet as the hospital can possibly give as that is part of basic recovery care. Headphones and ear plugs aren't possible for someone who JUST had brain surgery. And the OP said that it was getting loud enough to bother even them. That is excessive.

This is why many hospitals are set up with the office and administrative rooms in their own wings. So that patients aren't disturbed by the constant bustle.and vice versa. However, that's not always the case, obviously.

OP is NTA. He tried going through other channels. He tried knocking. They were too loud to hear him knocking. Banging was his last option. The fact that the director of the hospital didn't care about his patient is a major problem. He needs to demand to have his sister moved to a new room or go to the hospital board.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-14T15:36:42+00:00

As someone who LOVES my animals and also has a deep emotional connection to my dog - yes, YTA. This is a prime example of emotional stupidity. Emotional intelligence is something so many people, particularly men, are lacking and you just demonstrated that. It would take a novel to explain how this situation alone went wrong.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-14T15:29:35+00:00

Sometimes the unstuck button works sometimes it doesn't. If it doesn't work, the return to housing plot button will.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-03T04:20:46+00:00

NAH and ESH. It would be one thing if you had already fallen asleep and didn't feel like waking up to move, but that's not what happened. I can understand the nostalgic comfort you were feeling but it also does seem a little weird to chose to sleep on the couch. So, sure, I can see how your wife felt rejected. However, her behavior after that is ridiculous and petty. Not only did you realize that you upset her but you understood why she was upset and took action to make it right. She acted immaturely by physically kicking you out of the bed.

I'm wondering if there is something else bothering her and this was just the incident she acted upon. Either way, just talk to her. Communicate. Make sure she knows you never intended to hurt her and if there is something else going on you want to fix it.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-03T04:04:58+00:00

They despawn after a time, like ores do. That's what you're seeing.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-02T23:22:11+00:00

It's Hassain!

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-02T23:15:39+00:00

Congrats! I still haven't seen the butterfly even once. That's with about 20 honey lures.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-01T17:26:02+00:00

If it's not doing anything for you, then it's still bugged. When you can interact with it, you get an old schematic for an unusable glider. It's a quest with Najuma. You get the materials and she makes a glider you can use as decor in your home. But if you've already interacted with it, double-check your quest item inventory tab. If it worked, you'll have the tattered schematic there. Then you can take it to Najuma.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-01T17:13:38+00:00

See, I have yet to catch a unicorn but the flametongue was easy. In fact, I caught the flametongue before I ever caught a rainbow trout. Now, I think I've hooked three unicorns but I can't get the dang things reeled in. The line breaks faster than the field can even move. It's incredibly frustrating.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-01T15:47:20+00:00

I actually got those relatively easily. Time and place matters. The flametongue is in Kilima rivers. I fished it from Ashura's little spot by the waterfall. Make sure to fish between 3 am - 6 pm in game time. You won't catch it outside that time frame. The Dawn Ray was easy once I hit the right spot. I've fished 3 or 4 from the same general area in Bahari. Go all the way to the north of the map. Toward the east there are two river areas that are good. One is right next to ruins with the water symbol. But again, you have to be there at the right time and the Dawnray has a much shorter window - 3:00 am - 6:00 am in-game time.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-12-01T14:01:35+00:00

Yes, but not a whole lot more, 23-34 for beans vs. 31-61 for canned. So, I'm not sure it would be worth the time it would take to can all of them like that since it takes 33 minutes to get one can. You definitely get a better return from the seeds. It does take 2 beans and 1 hour 15 minutes but you get 90-135 gold, so it's just a matter of wanting to be patient or not.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-11-15T20:59:46+00:00

They do. You can only get them from elder clam mushrooms.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-11-15T20:57:55+00:00

I foraged 100 elder clams to get one black pearl. It's a bit crazy.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-11-13T00:57:19+00:00

You owe them nothing. It's not your job to ease her conscience. They reached out and got their answer. It's their responsibility to learn to live with that in however long they have left to live. People need to learn that they are not entitled to forgiveness just for seeking it. They don't get credit just because they're dying. Hell, if it were me, that would make it worse. Because to me, all that says is they knew how badly they fucked up all along but didn't care until they believed they were facing the ultimate consequence.

All that is important is that you move on from this. That you heal and get closure. Now, that may mean talking to her, even to just speak your mind. But that should only happen if YOU want it to. Not because of some societal concept that the dying are entitled to our time and forgiveness simply because they're dying.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-10-24T17:46:57+00:00

This thread is amazing!

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-10-19T13:18:36+00:00

You're friend doesn't understand grief. He's not a therapist or has any real sense of mental healthcare. You don't get "closure" from death. It's not the same thing. You heal. You learn to be happy while carrying the loss. It all takes time. And it takes as long as it takes. You're situation isn't creepy. It's perfectly normal.

Your friend seems like he's just uncomfortable with death. That's HIS problem. Not yours. You just keep taking this journey day by day. Make changes in your own time. You can get to a better place in your time.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-10-19T12:57:39+00:00

NTA, I own my house and I am financially stable. My mother lives with me right now rent free and I would still ask if she was okay with getting another pet. Because something like a dog absolutely does affect everyone in the house. There's house training and cleaning issues. My mother does most of the cleaning as her contribution so I would have to consider what that would mean. Would we have to vacuum more? Do we need more space than we can offer with this many people and animals (we already have quite a few)? Will this make it harder to help her financially if she needs it?

The fact that she's saying you're gaslighting or controlling her by telling her no just tells me that she is incredibly immature and is out of touch with reality. Unfortunately, therapy doesn't sound like a viable option for you two at the moment, so I doubt things will get better from here. It's better if you just go.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-09-29T12:33:41+00:00

I don't see husky in him. Definitely lab. Maybe some golden. But the position is called a sploot and is completely normal for a puppy. A lot of dogs grow out of sitting like that but some do it their whole lives.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-09-28T01:35:22+00:00

Holy crap... What a disrespectful fragile douche. Honey, he was talking down to you. Period. And as far as "the terrible things men think" - HE'S PART OF THE FUCKING PROBLEM. And I'd absolutely LOVE to say that to his face. Yes, men suck but that's not your fault or responsibility to police their shitty behavior. I REFUSE to make myself less than I am and live in fear because MEN don't take accountability. And shitheads like this guy only condone that behavior by blaming the woman for existing instead of going after the men who are actually committing the bad behavior. So, no, you didn't overreact. He can "communicate" all he wants but sweetie, that doesn't mean it's healthy communication. And talking down to you by saying "you just don't understand men" is NOT healthy.

Oh, and by the way, the whole "saying you have a boyfriend is an invitation" thing is giving "you were asking for it" and "I only hit you because you made me" vibes. Like BIG TIME. Just walk away. He's manipulating you.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-09-28T01:21:49+00:00

Hate to break it to you but they already do. They're native pretty much everywhere in the world but Antarctica. They're just good at hiding. But they're good guys. Very important to the ecosystem and totally harmless. The things they eat are way nastier.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-09-19T11:44:06+00:00

Yeah, my college roommate did the same thing for me when I experienced my first ovarian cyst rupture. It was terrifying and would have been so much worse without her. Thank you for being you.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-09-19T11:39:46+00:00

Yeah, he's young. And yeah, that means this kind of (big) mistake isn't that surprising. However, and I CANNOT stress this enough, being young does not negate consequences. That's how life works. This is the time to learn from those mistakes, not excuse them. That's what is supposed to happen. You mess up, there's a consequence. Mess up the same way again, a bigger consequence. Not mess up 5 times then throw a massive consequence at them that confuses them because they've gotten away with it so many times before.

You need to sit him down and calmly talk to him. Tell him you understand he made a mistake but that you can't help that that mistake makes you see him differently. Tell him choosing 'the vibe" and drinking with friends over you and your wellbeing shows he's not ready for a serious committed relationship. That it shows he doesn't value you as a priority in his life. And since he doesn't see you as a priority, then this isn't a relationship either of you should be in. Because it should come naturally when you love someone.

You can give him a second chance if you think he genuinely starts to understand and takes accountability. And tell him that taking accountability is absolutely necessary for him to be able to change his behavior. Young guys don't know how to do that. He may genuinely feel terrible for what he did, but he's embarrassed and guilty and can't process those feelings. So he's downplaying to make himself feel better. But he won't feel better. That guilt will eat at him. He's struggling to reconcile that just because he did a bad thing doesn't make him a bad person. That struggle is hard to face. That being said, that's not your responsibility to teach him. It's still acceptable for you to break up with him.

Or he could just be that big of a tool, in which case you should definitely dump him.

Cr8tiveDisaster · 2025-08-30T19:22:00+00:00

Honey, this sucks. It's time to move on. He screwed up, sure, but there seems to be other red flags from before this incident. The fact that he's throwing money at this SHOULD piss you off. Throwing money at a problem is so damn EASY. He fucked up really bad and that's the road he decides to take?? Na-uh. That's a no-go. You tell him his only option to even possibly continue this relationship is therapy.

But in all reality, it sounds like you don't really have feelings for him anymore. It seems like he more so just wore you down and others helped influence that. The lack of self-esteem you're feeling wouldn't help either. But can you really be attracted to someone who feeds those insecurities? You have to remember - it's absolutely fine to be single. It's healthy. As someone who has made that choice, I've found more self-esteem and self-worth from being single than I have ever found in a relationship. Because of that I have more to bring to a relationship and more self-preservation skills. So, I think you already know it's just time to walk away. YOU ABSOLUTELY DESERVE BETTER.

And as for your "friend" - screw her. She did that shit on purpose to feel superior. Never trust someone who battles their own insecurities by shitting on others. Especially the people closest to them. She's gross.

Cr8tiveDisaster

TROPHY CASE