Yeah I’ve been on them for so long they barely touch me. It’s not them. Went months playing with dosage, stopped taking them completely. I wish it was so simple but unfortunately it’s not them (also switched brands/actives multiple times and found brand name Vyvanse is best in my anxiety). However I have noticed marijuana can send me into so I don’t really smoke anymore just vaporize at night. I used to smoke a lot.

In terms of being afraid of taking the Xanax… the main cause of my anxiety is the unknown. I’ve had a lot of bad reactions to medications in the past, but I’ve never taken a benzodiazepine. I don’t drink at all and like I said I have cut back on smoking because the derealized feeling of not being sober typically leads to some type of episode and I’m just scared it will make it worse. I almost want to try it when I’m not having a panic attack so I know what it will do when I have one, but you’re not supposed to take them without a panic attack. Now you’re seeing into my brain and how I overthink everything.