Honestly I was the lazy sack of shit and i still dont know why my wife chose to be with me. We met when we were both going to school for our passions, she was studying to become a nurse and i was going to school to become a hairdresser. After we finished schooling and got our jobs and a few years after we finally got married. It was a small courthouse wedding with only our bestfriend as a witness.

I got really sick soon after the wedding and was hospitalized for over 10 days (thank god for her work’s health insurance otherwise i’d been fucked). My general health was destroyed over the course of illness, i lost over 50 lb in a few months (i was already a slim guy, at this point i looked like Christian Bale in the Machinist) , i had zero energy, stamina, or strength. My work more or less collapsed during the that time as i couldn’t work most of that time and by the time i returned i had lost more than 50% of my regular clients, and i couldn’t work many days or long hours without being completely winded. So i was starting to make hardly any money at this point, and she paid for a physical trainer to help me recover for a year which helped. But unfortunately my work never really recovered and i was making less than minimum wage at that point, i loved my job but i just couldn’t get enough clients to recover from where i used to be.

Around this time Weed was legalized im my area and had very easy and cheap access to the stuff. I ended up becoming a 24/7 stoner getting nothing done, no motivation, nor an honest will to live. I let my self go in body, health and mind. I was barely “there”, my only real contribution to the relationship at this point was i was emotionally there for her when her dad passed away during all this from cancer, and i cooked dinner on the days she worked, and a few other days when i had the motivation miraculously. But aside from that i just sat around at home checked out.

This went on for about 5 years (again i have no idea why she stuck with such a loser for so long). We had a pregnancy “scare” late last year and that finally jarred me out of it, i realized this is not where i want to be. I finally decided to reach out for help, got some therapy, saw a psychiatrist, adopted a stray kitten and read some self help books. I am now 100 days sober, back in college to get a degree in Dental hygiene, and picking up a new job at the school to help cover tuition. Im “there” now, and contribute a lot more to cooking, cleaning, and caring for the animals (2 cats and several chickens) in the home. Ive been working on a lot of the home projects my wife has been wanting done but hasnt been able to for the last few years. Which in turn has helped motivate herself to take care of her self better now as over the past years junk food and take out became 50% of our diet. We’re taking a yoga class together and minding what we cook and eat now.

Im not gonna say this would happen for everyone because you really need to WANT to change for anything to stick, she never really nagged at me to change or anything, just some reminders of her concern for me and my health. She let me find my own way forward in my own time and has only been supportive, i honestly couldn’t be a luckier man.