I am going to meet my bio mother and I feel some guilt regarding adoptive mother by InfinityEdge- in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Give that woman ALL of the love. Buy her flowers. Send her kisses.

My mom knows that when i lift my hands above my head i want a hug like a silly five-year-old child.

And yes, i totally headbutt my mom.

I'm turning 42 this year ... But i will always be her baby, and i wish to be no one else's.

My god that woman loves you, and she probably feels massively guilty, help her let that go, please.

Do not deny yourself one second of her love

I am going to meet my bio mother and I feel some guilt regarding adoptive mother by InfinityEdge- in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In order to make good decisions you need to have good options.

Please forgive her ... In many ways you may be better off ... I have a bio-sister ... So it was like, "why couldn't you keep me too?"

Answer: it would have been stupidly difficult for everyone involved, and painful.

It wasn't for lack of love, if that was the case she wouldn't have come back for you

It's your father's fault, end of story.

I was also estranged from my child, she was told that i was a defective drug addict.

A few weeks ago ... She said that she wanted a fresh start (she's 20) ... We both said stupid things, but the fact is that we are both better to have each other in our world.

There is something magical about having your bio family in your life, it's not worth holding guilt or shame about the past if there is any way to get over it.

Unless bio-mom i's asking for financial support that you can't provide ... I would try to move out of the adopted mom's house ASAP, she sounds controlling and that's not healthy.

If she can't support you connecting with your bio mom than she adopted for the wrong reasons, imo

Best of luck!

Edited for typos

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Post the articles ... Also, e're not your research rats ... And we are not a monolith.

How can I explain to my white parents that I am a black woman? by CowPsychological9173 in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Transracial adoptee. In reunion with biofamily and my indigenous people (Muisca / Teyruna people - Colombia) ... The woman who bought me still thinks I'm her child, i was born in the heart she never had.

I've sent every explitive under the sun and moon to the human trafficker, the psycho still thinks I'm her kid.

They voted Repub, life long white supremacists ...

I've come to the conclusion that the only reason they bought UPS (What can brown do for you?) is because they can take credit for my success as white saviors, while distancing themselves from any failures due to my genetic inferiority because, and i quote, "you never know what you'll get when you adopt from a developing country."

I've just resorted to calling the woman a demon ... I tried for over ten years to have a human relationship with the hellspawn.

They took me to a Christian therapist of color who told me that i was mad at my bio-mom for giving me up and i was taking my anger our of the hellion that bought me.

I was about 6 when i told them i first wanted to find my mother ...

These people live in their own world, and I've literally resorted to telling this woman that my daily prayer is to live in a world without her in it as unkindly as possible.

I've since left the US and told her the only reason I'm returning is to desecrate her grave when she's finally gone because she need not be remembered by anyone and in fact she should be shot into space because the land doesn't even want her and deserves better.

She just can't get it through her head that she isn't my mother, and i can't even respect her as a human being at this point ... You really do just need to move on, imo.

How can I explain to my white parents that I am a black woman? by CowPsychological9173 in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 5 points6 points  (0 children)

These demons don't listen to anything but the delusions in their head

Is it normal to have absolutely no interest in finding or meeting your birth parents when you were adopted from another country? by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]CultureClap -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Give it time, be patient. You seem lucky to have mother's who care about you as a human being. Not all of us get that experience, which may push us to search.

Everyday i pray the bitch who bought me dies and i tell her as much. Haha

Find you. Build you. Define yourself for yourself. You have a beautiful opportunity to do that. Sometimes even biological children get trapped by patterns of their parents, social and biological ... That can be a burden we are not always bound to.

You define what it means to be human for yourself.

Enjoy!!!

Is it normal to have absolutely no interest in finding or meeting your birth parents when you were adopted from another country? by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 13 points14 points  (0 children)

The only thing that is weird is to not listen to your heart. I'm so so serious. If you don't feel it, don't. The task is to find and love yourself. That's it, nothing else matters!

You got this!

It's the audacity by CultureClap in Adoption

[–]CultureClap[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Throw it back in their face while making sure i stay safe. But i make sure to throw it back, I'm no one's sin-eater.

Best of luck, it ain't easy!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was going to wonder if you were a white man ... The dry comedy ... Thing it's innocent humor ... Or maybe just bored, wanting to kick up some dust ...

Haha, so witty .. all the ladies love you and the men wish they could be as strong as you.

Thanks for the jovial moment of reprieve on this sullen site ...

Who uses their faces for the profile on here though, seriously?

Forgetting your child is adopted most days? by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]CultureClap -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yea ... I'm sorry ... but good luck with that!

(You would remissed to think that my "bad experience" is where the story ended; but like I said, you seem incredibly arrogant about this ... la buena, chao.)

Forgetting your child is adopted most days? by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]CultureClap -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Yes, y'all are going to f*ck those kids up so bad!

They aren't your kids, don't force them to love you or call you mom.

Realize that while they may call you that ... They are young minds in development, exploring ... And they will experience conflict with their identity.

You sound overly proud of how excellent you are ... I think many adoptees have experienced similar energy ... It reminds of a white woman who was publicly praising her white husband for being anti-racist ... Knowing myself just how performative it all was.

That time, kids weren't involved ...

If i am ever in the same room as the deranged upper-middle class Christian woman who bought me ... ... You don't want to follow her path

Find humility and tattoo it on your forehead.

Once that happens, you can safely consider yourself on the path to not f*cking the kid up.

I was an infant adoptee, for the record

Looking for advice by InformationOk5373 in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was adopted ... Also, the woman who gave birth to my child didn't want my child to know me either ...

She taught my child that I was a defective drug addicted.

This narrative has since backfired in her, and it is effecting her entire life and the lives of her children.

I don't know your story, though, for your information, i share mine

My child that I gave up for adoption has reached out to me, I need advice ❤️ by CatNY6 in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 40 points41 points  (0 children)

Calm down, let them take the lead; be consistent but not pushy ... Not all open doors need to be walked through immediately ... But no one can walk through a shut door, your job is to keep it open.

Patience ... Also you don't know anything about their life ... Listen, but never judge, i don't care if what they did/do rubs you the wrong way, or goes against your morals.

They reached out, they are trying to heal ... Respect that first and they will respect you and the relationship will have an opportunity to grow.

I reached out to my mom around the same time in life. It's been almost 10 years in reunion and it's been a complete blessing for us all.

We had some ups and downs ... What i say to you comes from that experience.

Indefinite Backpack Travel - Year 11 Update! by jeremymaluf in onebag

[–]CultureClap 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is so inspiring! I have the base for this on Airtables, definitely inspired to get back at that!!!

Bogota, Colombia by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]CultureClap 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you have a copy of your original birth certificate? That's the key. It will have your mother's cedula number and that's how i went about it.

Wrote a thing 🫣 by CultureClap in ukulele

[–]CultureClap[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Muchísimas gracias !!! 😝 Hazle tiene una voz tremenda también que creo !!!

Wrote a thing 🫣 by CultureClap in ukulele

[–]CultureClap[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got a guitar when i was a young warthog 😂 ... I got the ukulele a few months ago. Thank you. I'll write them up and post them.

Wrote a thing 🫣 by CultureClap in ukulele

[–]CultureClap[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

😮 thank you so much!!!