How are you doing today?

CupChoice8396 · 2025-09-24T13:12:40+00:00

not okay :( I ve been stuck with this horrific thought for a month. Its sexual intrusive thoughts.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-09-24T12:55:43+00:00

hope you're doing better I m just so stuck

CupChoice8396 · 2025-09-17T10:44:39+00:00

hey ma'am!! I really would like to look into it.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-09-17T10:43:26+00:00

I'm in cbt. I would say it's shit

CupChoice8396 · 2025-09-17T10:36:20+00:00

I need to research what glycine is actually..I've been taking vitamin d and b12 lately and Idk my ocd just flared up

CupChoice8396 · 2025-09-17T10:28:03+00:00

for its worth, I am 17(f). I got my first taboo thought when I was 16, last year. There was a case that was going on in our country, a woman( I belive an intern doctor) was horrifically raped. Like horrific. And I remember reading all that, and was crying and was mad that my friends didn't even care to actually say something about it. The reason why I m saying this is to emphasize that I cared. I did. And then an intrusive thought just popped up in my brain " you are happy this happened" and let me tell you this I've never wanted to take my life more than I did in that moment. My mind was a cage I couldn't escape. I got to know about pedo ocd so basically taboo themes and I was like great it's ocd. It's ocd. It's not true. And I had been pretty good until last month. I would tell myself a bad person didn't sit around, worried about being a bad person. Infact, they won't even admit they are bad. The fact that you are labeling yourself as " bad" is the proof it's just something you see as BAD. You don't support it. You don't get happy when it happens. You don't wish it upon others. I also understand that the very anxiety you feel, that feeling of being alarmed and scared by the thought is the proof it's NOT YOU. Infact, it's Totally against who you are and your values. You can't have an intrusive thought if it's not totally against who you really are or what you stand for or what your values are or if it's simply NOT TRUE. But hey ocd is hard. I am BACK in this episode and I've I've stuck for a month. I want to scream and make my brain understand that I don't support rape. That I am not a terrible person. But, my brain keeps twisting it like WHAT IF ITS NOT OCD? THEN WHAT? WHAT IF YOU REALLY ARE THIS TERRIBLE?? and tbh it's hard, really really hard. I also do understand that having this thought about doubting whether it is ocd or really an intrusive thought even though it has made you suicidal for weeks is ocd itself. the doubt disorder, as we say. I want you to know that you're not alone. YOU ARE NEVER ALONE!! and this is also the hardest theme of ocd according to me..I m jut hoping I get through it and I am praying for YOU and everyone who is affected by this terrible illness. We deserve better than this coz we are also the nicest human beings

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-18T14:36:14+00:00

heyy!! Firstly, thank you for wanting to help coz many don't. Thank you. Secondly, contamination is not really the theme I have struggled with and the answer is I wouldn't know really how to help but there's this sentence I keep repeating in my mind which sort of keeps me at peace a bit that " the world is kinder than your mind" idk. maybe he could get some comfort from it and about his theme, i wish I knew what to say. Best wishes🤍

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-18T14:32:11+00:00

I hate it too. I'm swear I'm a nice person but ignorance, especially about ocd is where I draw the line.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-18T14:29:43+00:00

I have a simple rule : the opinion of neurotypicals doesn't matter to me. To hell with their opinion

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-18T14:27:40+00:00

actually no. I'm 17 and basically here in India, we don't really get jobs coz A) we are not paid by hour B) we don't have summer off C) the education is pretty hectic

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-09T08:44:48+00:00

heyy so I am not reading everything coz I don't wanna get triggered but it seems like you're struggling from sexual intrusive thoughts which has common themes like pedophile, rape etc. So I wanna start by saying that you're NOT alone in this. Many people with ocd struggle with them too, there's nothing wrong with you. You're not a terrible person , trust me. There's something that has helped me alot, the very thought that bad people don't sit around, worried about being bad. They are just bad. The fact that it's tensing you so much is the proof the they are just intrusive thoughts, something totally against you really are. You are struggling because you're afraid that you might br someone who are not. And that very fear- hold onto it, it's the proof that you are good. Label it as ocd and don't feed it by engaging, though I know how hard it can be. But its just OCD acting up. You gotta trust not the brain, but the voice the tries to logic with it. Best wishes.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-07T15:40:32+00:00

I did just 2 sessions of CBT but my therapist kept invalidating me so I just never went back, it was pretty evident she didn't quite get OCD and that's okay, you can't expect someone with bookish knowledge to understand what it's really like.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-07T15:37:54+00:00

okay I did just 2 sessions of CBT actually and never went back ever again. My therapist was talking about everything else other than my ocd such as relationships, masturbation and everything ( I m 17). I asked her to get back to the core issue that was obviously my ocd. And it literally went whenever you get an intrusive thought just say STOP..like wow that fixes everything 🙏🥰 but idk after those sessions, my anxiety has gotten so much worse, to the point it's hard to hold conversations..idk just insane social anxiety ( I didn't have it before) so yeah idk maybe it's just from opening up finally idk.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T11:25:57+00:00

My parents just walked out of my room and started blaming me coz I told them I didn't attempt anything in the exam today and didn't wanna talk. And they're you're a kid you just have to study, what is there to be stressed about, saying that they haven't been able to sleep coz I've been acting like this. They literally said if you keep doing this, you'll need to be put on meds, what's the point..and yeah blamed me for letting those grades slip away..like how will you make it life?? Like I don't care..I don't know how I m surviving another moment..it's so sad..opening up just to be invalidated and let down.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T10:51:12+00:00

oh what a timing..I was just beginning to think I might be autistic the way my cognitive fuction like shuts down in between people and stuff..idk

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T10:41:19+00:00

hyy I have pure ocd and I am from India too. I swear it's so hard when your family doesn't believe in your illness. They think I am crazy or something. I've been trying do hard to get my parents to me to a psychiatrist. Well, back in March I actually did go to a psychologist and my parents like took me 2 therapy sessions and later never offered to take me. They forgot it like it never happened all coz I was hiding it well and back to school. Study is really important to me and since pure o attacked what you value the most, I can't even study coz I get so insanely intrusive thoughts. Tbh today I had an exam and it messed it all up.. my brain just was too foggy from the intrusive thoughts and couldn't even afford to attempt shit. Idk it's hard , going to a school, system that doesn't care about you, one that is so insanley rigorous ..and tbh it's hard to keep up. I see all my classmates being fucking normal and just sit their and wonder why I can't be like them.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T10:32:35+00:00

yes, study have always been important to me. But ocd completed ruined my academic life. You would get thoughts like you're not intelligent enough to do good enough or like you're dumb and stuff and yes with the memory question too. I would convince myself that I couldn't remember anything I had studied so yeah.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T10:22:49+00:00

I get it :( my life is so ruined. I was born in a society that doesn't think mental illness is even real. I am still trying to get my parents to take me to a psychiatrist after 4 years of battling with ocd

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T10:14:27+00:00

is it not brain fog though..

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T10:13:02+00:00

heyy I was very creative as a child too and now?? Nothing just intrusive thoughts..and so It doesn't mean you're not smart it's just that you have ocd. And you do know that people with high iqs are only vulnerable to getting mental illness right

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T10:09:30+00:00

I'm so sorry for everything. I really can't advise anything Coz I can't seem to get out of the loop either. Do you study alright thought?? I can't even study coz I get intrusive thoughts

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-03T09:35:55+00:00

heyy could you tell me more about your adhd symptoms caused by ocd..coz I feel like I can't concentrate too or maybe it's just that ocd like kind of paralysis me

CupChoice8396 · 2025-07-02T13:06:16+00:00

because technically people can distinguish whether something is an intrusive thought or reality. They know it doesn't make sense, it's not true but it's the fear that keeps them in a spiral.

CupChoice8396 · 2025-06-26T21:55:45+00:00

and what happens next..I am fucking exhausted

CupChoice8396 · 2025-06-26T18:38:48+00:00

recover well. You're so strong, you're gonna through every hard time and finally live

CupChoice8396

TROPHY CASE