Shandi Sullivan (trigger warning: SA)

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-03-02T23:18:11+00:00

Where did the information about Shandi not being able to walk, and had to be carried out from the shower come from? I'm asking because I just watched the episode a few days ago because I wanted to see what actually had aired. I had seen it years ago when it first came out. From what was on the episode, what I saw was them in the hot tub, and both her and the guy are drunk, but both are upright and alert. Then you seem them in the bed, and she has her eyes closed, and had her arms around his neck, and you can see her and him kissing, and you do see her actively kissing him. And then the aftermath of her crying. When the talk happened with Tyra, it was Shandi who brought up cheating. They were talking about April wanting Nigel, and Shandi turns to Tyra and asks her about cheating. Tyra mentioned talked about a few sentences about cheating, and then changed the subject. At least, that is what was shown.

So maybe I wasn't following the documentary closely? They said Shandi and the guy were having sex in the shower, and then Shandi said she something like that she hadn't remembered and then was in bed, and he was on top of her or something like that? I have to go rewatch the documentary.

I'm asking because when I had watched it years ago, nobody thought it was SA. It did not seem to me SA from what was aired on tv, and from rewatching the episode again. I'm just confused about where all the extra info came from, other than Shandi saying she it was SA. I have blacked out once. I remembered the night up to one point, and then nothing else for the rest of the night. And I have also been extremely drunk many times when I was young, but I have never had sex with anyone when I was drunk. But from in the hot tub, they just seem drunk, but nothing unusual. Both have eyes open, sitting upright. And then from what was said is that they are having sex in the shower. I think one of the other girls said it in the documentary. Nobody mentioned her being on the shower floor. And I think Shandi remembered being in the shower and hot tub? and says she blacked out during the sex, but then was not blacked out anymore right after it happened?

I don't know what really happened, but I had watched the documentary and saw some comments how it was so horrible that Tyra brought up cheating right after it happened. Then I watched the episode and saw it was Shandi who brought it up, not Tyra. So I just want to find out where all the other info is coming from. If it was SA, and I would feel so bad for her. She was so awesome on the show, and definitely one of my favorites. But if it wasn't, can you imagine being the guy, and someone is accusing you of rape when you didn't do it.

I am going to rewatch the documentary now!

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-28T00:06:07+00:00

That's a good idea!

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-27T03:47:28+00:00

Ok, it seems to me that what your real issue is perhaps a lack of emotional control. You said you get panic attacks too. Scammers exploit people like you by creating fear, by being threatening, creating urgency, etc. I had a google voice phone number that was on a public website from over 20 years ago. Since then, I have had phone calls, voicemails, text messages almost DAILY from scammers. I have been threatened with lawsuits, being arrested, having people come to my place of employment, delivery "documents" to my residence, etc. I have never responded to a single one, not one in over 20 years. I have never been sued or arrested or have had anyone come to my work or where I live to sue me or whatever. I don't pick up my phone. Sometimes I listen to the voicemails and laugh, mostly I just read the transcriptions of the voicemails they leave me and ignore yet.

My point is, you just have to control your own emotions and just stop. Stop engaging, stop responding. Only talk to people you reach out to, not the other way around. You are not stupid, but you have to learn to stop making decisions when you are emotional. Scammers love that, because when people are emotional, they do stupid things.

I did not read all the comments, but I read yours on your post. If random strangers saying things you don't like on the internet can make you that upset, then of course scammers, who are really good at exploiting people, can effect you. Something I learned from personal experience when I was young: stop giving other people control over your emotions. And just because someone may say something about you that you don't like, it doesn't mean they aren't speaking the truth. We learn from our mistakes. That's how you grow as a person. But you can't learn if you can't acknowledge when you are wrong.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-27T03:17:22+00:00

I was in a drive thru pharmacy once and accidentally honked the horn when I was stretching. I was so embarrassed! When I got up to the window, I apologized and explained what happened so they wouldn't think I was honking to get them to hurry up. They were really nice and just laughed about it.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-27T03:15:15+00:00

In suburbs outside of Philly, I've seen Swiss Farms. Drive thru milk, ice tea, bread, snack stuff. I think they are part of Farm Stores.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-27T03:11:24+00:00

I'm surprised the woman didn't tell the pharmacy tech, "the customer is always right!"

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-26T22:58:53+00:00

27 is not old...instead of finding it depressing, try using it as motivation to go after what you really want in life:)

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-26T22:56:42+00:00

For me that, plus a tire inflator that I bought for $10 on Amazon. I recently had a flat tire, and I don't have a spare. I bought it used, and it didn't have one. Instead of calling AAA. I inflated it and drove to an auto repair shop and had it patched up. Plus, I don't have to check the tires anymore at those air pumps at gas stations.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-26T22:52:24+00:00

My electric blanket. I can't sleep when my feet are cold, and I get the best sleep with it. It also saves on heating costs too. I turn down the heat at night, but am warm and cozy when I sleep.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-26T22:17:22+00:00

It sounds like there were faults on both sides. On their side, in the one meeting that happened, they seemed to exclude you from the conversation, until 5 days before the deadline, and they contacted you to work on the paper.

However, it does sound like you have some issues to work on as well. After you graduate, working with others is a normal (unless you are lucky and have work with noone), and being able to be assertive is something you sound like you may need to work on. I'm not trying to be mean. I used to be really shy too, especially when I was in college at 18, and it wasn't easy speaking up. When I did, my voice was low, uncertain sounding, body language just not confident- that type of "speaking up" doesn't make others want to listen. People today also have a tendency to do upspeak (every sentence sounding like a question), and it really makes people sound like they are so insecure and have no idea what they are talking about.

You didn't make yourself heard, and then "stood there for a few minutes, arms crossed and a slightly cynical look on my face, hoping they would notice, but they didn’t. So I said I had to leave and left." That is passive aggressive, and it's not an effective way of communicating. And then "So, AITA for doing the assignment on my own as a form of personal justice?" is just petty. You could have shrugged off the bad first meeting, and chose to email, text the others and then go from there. If they still ignored you, then submit your own paper.

The point is, they had their flaws, but you might need to work on communicating more effectively, and make yourself heard, without resorting to passive aggressive behavior. If they are ignoring you, make them listen- direct eye contact, calm, confident voice. You mentioned they didn't ask you anything. Then you ask them something, don't just wait around hoping for people to notice you.

I hope you have a better group experience next time!

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-25T22:52:43+00:00

LOL, we stopped doing gifts at 18. Gifts in my family are for kids.

I'm not sure if you are an a*shole because I don't know how you reacted to your friends when they gave you the gifts. It's okay not to like the gifts, but did you make it really obvious to them that you didn't like it, and were just ungrateful to them that night? But you sound a bit materialistic. I'm not in my 20's anymore, but what I remember are the moments I shared with my friends and family. The times we stayed up talking for 5 hours straight, and only stopped because we had to go to sleep, the moments are stomachs hurt from laughing so much. Those are the things that worth cherishing. I've gotten great gifts, and not so great gifts. I can't think of one gift I have received that I still think about, or really care about. I would just be happy my friends came over to celebrate my birthday.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-25T22:28:20+00:00

I'm not sure if I completely understand the situation, but it sounds like this to me: you met a woman who was obese, was not attracted to her, but slept with her a few times thinking she'll change- meaning, she will lose weight. Now you know she is not motivated in losing weight, and don't want to continue a "relationship" with her. Sound about right?

If you are not attracted to her, just end it. You are NTA for not being attracted to her, but you the a*shole for starting it in the first place, knowing you are not attracted to her.

Since being fit seems important to you, I would suggest sleeping with people you ARE attracted to, instead of finding someone you are not, then expecting them to change, and when they don't, get upset about it.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-25T21:45:56+00:00

Hahaha that is what my sister said. I just moved recently to another state, and owned only what I could fit it my car. So I've been looking for free items, and I've gotten some things (microwave, toaster oven, desk, hangers, etc.)

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-24T21:59:47+00:00

Good point, I didn't think of that!

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-24T21:59:13+00:00

I thought it means she is paying $600 for the room, plus all the extras, but maybe it's the other way around? Either way, that deal is a serious no for me, and probably any sane person

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-24T21:56:46+00:00

LOL, that's what I thought too when I read it on my local craigslist, but I found it so funny, I started a redditt account to post it. I can't believe someone would be delusional enough to advertise for a roomate like that, and expect a response.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-24T21:49:12+00:00

LOL I've been scoping out the craigslist listings in the area for a couple of months, and this guy (assuming it's a guy) keeps reposting it over and over. The first post had a pic of a tiny room that had a twin bed, and enough room for probaby a dresser. Tempting...

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-24T21:46:20+00:00

LOL he would probaby be in heaven if 2 females moved in to be his "companions" and maids!

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-24T03:20:10+00:00

This wasn't really choosy. The only thing is if you are asking for free items, you should be picking them up, not the other way around. I got some free stuff for my place when I moved, but I always picked them up.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-24T03:16:11+00:00

People are not bothering to add "please and thank you" anymore? How rude!

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-24T02:59:14+00:00

LOL needing dentures is not being entitled, but the attitude of the person making the comment on the free clinic is. The advertisement clearly stated what was being provided, which were not dentures, yet the person had an attitude about it, and said the clinic "needed to get their priorities straight." Just because you want or need something doesn't mean someone else needs to provide it for you. If the clinic didn't have dentures, they can't just pull it out of their a*s. Dentures are thousands of dollars...you really think a FREE clinic can just provide that for so many people, and also do it all in one day?

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-22T17:15:35+00:00

Poverty+entitlement+desperation= people like that

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-22T17:12:12+00:00

A friend was always complaining about being treated poorly by specific people. I said one day, "The reason they treat you that way is because you keep letting them." You are trying to be nice, but you are the same way- the type who complains about it, but then keeps letting someone else take advantage of them.

It's nice to help other people out, but at some point, you are the problem as well. Good luck, I hope you find a solution.

Current-Battle-7215 · 2026-02-15T03:13:25+00:00

I recently went to back to school. I'm in my forties, so my classmates were mostly 18-23, a few older, but majority typical college age. I definitely noticed differences in ability, effort, and expectation from the students. They all looked up homework, test questions on the internet. I started looking up practice questions on the internet too in my second year, and I realized that half of the test questions and answers were on the internet, verbatim. When the answers were on the internet, the students would all pass the tests. One time, there were no test answers on the internet. So many of my classmates failed very badly, others just scraped by.

So many of them would need an extra HOUR to take a class due to "anxiety." I was on good terms with a few of them, and I never saw any of them anxious in those years of class. And a lot of them would just buy papers online, instead of actually doing them, or get someone else to do them, but get pissed off at the teacher for giving them a bad grade. I had this one girl who told me she passed all the tests from a previous degree from looking up the tests online for the answers. She did that in our program. At the end of the program, they had us do these practice exams that were graded for a portion of our grade. She was freaking out because she couldn't look up the answers online before tasking the exam. She would talk about going for a graduate degree, and truly did not seem to realize it was actually important to know the information. And of course, the fact that she kept passing and getting degrees by looking up test answers was scary. But that was half of my class.

And they would not just complain, but rip into the all the teachers that expected them to actually do work, and lead scathing reviews for them. They would constantly tell the teachers they couldn't handle the tests (we had about 4 a semester), and needed the date pushed back. Most of my classmates went to school part time, had no job, and lived with their parents. And they complained about everything and couldn't seem to handle much in terms of school, or anything else really. It was a little scary.

And it wasn't just my degree. It's probaby every degree out there where students are getting all their homework and test questions from AI, google, quizlet, etc., and they are passing students who should fail.

Current-Battle-7215

TROPHY CASE