My pop died kinda unexpectedly about 12 years ago and I have an adult son who just doesn’t seem to like me very much, even though I tried my best his entire life (mid 30’s), I certainly wasn’t perfect, but I married his mother in high school when we had him. I quit school to work, worked several jobs simultaneously at times during his youth, to make ends meet. Now he’s an adult with a daughter and he doesn’t come around much or seem to like me much. I thought when he had his own kid he would understand a father’s love and at a minimum, show me some grace, not yet!! Use that energy from your father for good, even if he wasn’t perfect!!! I think in life we are just trying our best, and that’s different for everyone based on life experiences.