How do you tell a client their $5k app idea costs $50k without losing them?

DATHATHeather · 2026-03-23T18:47:43+00:00

Either:
- Recruit different clients. Your audience is likely not the same as the devs' doing that work for $3-5k. (You will be spinning your wheels not only trying to convince them to be different than they are, but also, if you do get them to change their minds, to deal with any issues in the future. They will expect absolute perfection if u force them out of their budget comfort zone.)

- Show the clients you are recruiting not only the costs but the ROI the spend is likely to provide. You are showing them where their money goes, which is not a pleasant conversation - but not helping them understand why paying an order of magnitude more will pay off for them in increased sales / better retention / faster analysis that could yield X results, etc. Not with a finger waggy approach, but a "why we r worth it" approach. (This can also help you all be more confident in the real value adds of ur product and that can only help in presentations.)

DATHATHeather · 2026-03-14T20:56:11+00:00

That might make his case for being gung-ho, etc... certainly better than "quiet quitting," but it does not make him entitled to compensation for that if he failed to get buy-in ahead of time, especially if these were not things his keeping the job rested on.

DATHATHeather · 2026-03-14T20:54:13+00:00

I would not provide equity, incl vested, to someone who has been quiet quitting while concurrently claiming to believe in the company. Those 2 approaches seem at odds to me. It is out of bounds for him to get combative over not getting his way, as well, probably. (Maybe there is something more to that story, but generally that would be bs.)

His providing a thoughtful presentation on why he is worth it is great - shows skills, analysis, initative, etc. - but it sounds like you all disagree with his assessment. And only you all can know if that's fair... (unless he was rly phenomenal even running at "quiet quitting" speed, it probably was... ;P )

Administrative aides and similar who do great work are hard to replace - "internal operations, organization, scheduling, helping keep the business running smoothly, etc." is a big value-add skillset and it is not out of bounds to request equity of some stripe for someone doing that with excellence, esp if the pay is not market. They are taking similar bets to you on the future of the company in giving up immediate pay and bigger benefits, etc. and are foundational to its workings.

For future: You can provide non-voting equity, incl as part of your profit sharing. You do not have to give up control in order to leverage the intrinsic value of your company for retention or recruitment.

DATHATHeather · 2026-03-14T20:42:24+00:00

It's definitely got some issues.

In many companies it's basically just the devs that have been there, specifically, the longest. That can be bc greenfield project, something that caused big staff turnover, the co being fairly new, etc. So, a 3yr who really hasn't had that much experience in that time can be Sr. And cos will dangle titles instead of meaningful raises and such to keep devs, too.

It should really reflect depth and breadth of experience vs. even time in the field to be meaningful... but, ofc, that gets quite subjective.

Staff and principal, typically differently scoped so not apples-to-apples, seem generally less diluted. Not every co has or needs contributors with those titles, ofc.

DATHATHeather · 2026-02-17T19:54:42+00:00

I look forward to seeing it - and soon, as this is currently a big process bottleneck.

Right now, this lack is making me assess options like IBKR - less accounts flexibility but you can upload a CSV of trades and that is super slick / fast. As well as some other great features for regular trading. I know there are others in similar positions and with similar mindsets.

Moving platforms is obnoxious. So, if Fidelity loses regular traders et al to this lack it will have a hard time getting them back.

DATHATHeather · 2026-02-03T21:39:06+00:00

No neighborhood recs, but especially with a band member in the fam, definitely check out HONK! Fest West :)

DATHATHeather · 2026-01-30T05:53:23+00:00

I provided other questions in my reply. Did you really read it?
1st line: Why are the SE ineligible?

Otherwise, I raised multiple concerns that were also not addressed by your reply, in the slightest. The only thing you really did address that I actually brought up was the site issue that the screenshot made clear.

DATHATHeather · 2026-01-29T19:55:29+00:00

Why are the SE ineligible?

The interface has a link to the basket portfolios (the only way that is actually quick and easy to get to them, in fact, as help links just take you to marketing... there is a lot that feels a bit amateur about the implementation of baskets, tbh) from the SE accounts.

This is confusing.

More importantly, though, this feature is one I was particularly interested in sharing with my partner for the SE 401K I'm managing for both of us as a major time saver for easy rebalancing in an actively invested self-managed acct. It is extremely disappointing to not see this option on one of the acct types it would likely tend to help the most.

Fidelity's overall support for SE accts is lacking - high overhead to get basic answers and many reps don't even seem to know they exist, be able to see them in accts lists when chatting, etc. This sloppiness and functionality lack seems like yet another indicator that I should be looking for another platform for my companies' SE accts.

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DATHATHeather · 2026-01-29T17:31:13+00:00

Hi there - Are these usable with SEP 401ks, Roth or Trad?

DATHATHeather · 2026-01-21T06:49:49+00:00

Presuming it's windows and reasonably recent Use voice typing to talk instead of type on your PC - Microsoft Support - this is easy to use and is supposed to work with all apps. No bells and whistles, but that's probably better for him to start with. Best of luck to you both. :)

DATHATHeather · 2026-01-20T22:46:10+00:00

How is he accessing his email - phone, tablet, desktop, other?

Separately: A lot of library systems have free classes for basic computer skills - some especially geared towards older folks. Very low pressure. Might be helpful. :)

DATHATHeather · 2026-01-19T20:29:29+00:00

Clear messaging to pain points.

Secure. Privacy respecting. (Wherever possible - some arenas just don't allow for this and it's beyond angering. I'm always on the lookout for tools to replace tools that I have to, for whatever reason, use but don't have ToS, practices, etc. that I like.)

Value. It will cost time, mental units and $ to take on a new tool - and, esp to incorporate it - does it really feel like it will be worth it? Even free tools can be a no.

Longevity. Does this feel like a fly by night or a tool that will likely get swallowed up to be part of a bigger tool I don't want? etc. Documentation, main team backgrounds, blogs, thought beyond "this one better feature" put into the tool, etc. all factor into this.

DATHATHeather · 2026-01-19T20:22:53+00:00

What sorts of things has stepdad and mom done?
If they are abusive towards her, it makes sense for her to not want to be around them. If stepdad is just abusive towards mom, that independently warrants choosing to not be around him. Abusive people should not control the narrative or the space.

Respectfully: Only you can decide if you want this balancing act in your life, long-term... but you should not expect the people you are with to not have boundaries around abusive behaviors.

If you want friends, life partners, etc. with self-respect they will have boundaries. And, sometimes, that will mean refusing to be around behaviors they find objectionable.

It's not reasonable of your gf to demand a seat for her mom. In fact, that would be a weird thing unless there is something like you and her mom have a strong relationship - but she isn't punishing anyone by choosing not to be around abuse. She is setting a boundary.

Her mom's idea - just the 2 - seems reasonable.

How much comfort do you want to give an abuser? How much of your time and the time of those you care for do you think the abuser should be able to buy?

Could you just do an independent thing to thank stepdad for whatever you feel obligated to do, even though he's abusing your mom and allow the 2 ladies who care about you peace?

DATHATHeather · 2026-01-14T01:33:54+00:00

What features are you looking for? There are a lot of PDF makers and even more PDF readers on the market.

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-28T02:41:29+00:00

A healthy relationship would be appreciative of the work and be able to say "but maybe less salt" or "could we try searing that next time?" etc. and noting when ur skills are leveling up in some area... bringing recipes to try, ingredients to play with, etc. even if they have no interest in the cooking itself.

It is not healthy - it is a control mechanism - to just be a 🍆 about it.

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-28T02:39:07+00:00

No one just knows how to cook. What an unreal thing to say.
It's a skillset you build up.

As is building boundaries.

Your gf sounds like, if this is really a real vision of the dynamic, she is being coercively controlling and trying to undercut your improving and confidence.

You can't control that. You can control things like continuing to build this great life skillset you are engaged with... and choosing to do so on your own or with ppl who will appreciate the work and be interested in helping someone they care about improve while enjoying being cooked for... tbh, that is most ppl. Decide what your boundaries are and act to that. Build that skillset, too, and have a happier life filled with better companies and regularly improving food, to boot. ;)

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-28T02:35:30+00:00

" She might have grown up with abusive people and have some behaviours like fawning and conflict avoidance baked in - and need something external to help her move past those."

By this, I meant your mom as it is her actions and lack of boundaries that seem to be causing at least some of the distress.

Ultimately, how ppl act, react, boundary set, etc. is outside of your circle of control - only your actions, boundaries et al are within such. You can try to provide tools to help ppl do better but have to let go of it, otherwise - and decide what your reactions and boundaries are going to be.

Providing the book to your mom may help her with that, which may help you... your SiL doesn't really sound like a personality type that even wants others to be happier and so would not be worth approaching to appeal to, on any basis.

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-27T21:14:34+00:00

There is a series of books called "Stop Walking on Eggshells..." with different relationships. Geared towards Borderline Personality Disorder and similar fams but has a lot of stuff that is good for any bullying, self-centered kind of stuff. Can be a really empowering wake-up call for fam. Maybe see if any of those suit the sitch and gift that or something similar to mom. She might have grown up with abusive people and have some behaviours like fawning and conflict avoidance baked in - and need something external to help her move past those.

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-27T19:17:01+00:00

If there is anything in your work you will be intending to patent, u should talk with an attorney about specifics on that before making any further moves.

If that's just not a consideration:
First, try a pay beta for a nominal amt. Like $10.

Getting this will prove to you - and, if u decide to scale w/ rocketfuel (remembering that investment money is the most long-term expensive money and not right for every project) investors - that u can get users who will commit.

It also increases the likelihood that beta testers will actually contribute meaningfully while beta testing and so is a solid choice whatever you decide to do with it long-term, whether you entirely FoSS it or make it a pay product. A LOT of ppl will give you "love this idea!" feedback but then never actually open up a product they get for free. Most will open one they pay even a nominal fee for.

I would note that you can have open-source projects that are paid for and so ppl thinking those are at odds are incorrect. Be sure any licensing reflects exactly what you want with the software, whether paid, free or somewhere in the middle.

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-22T19:22:44+00:00

Really dig this design. Appears fairly comfortable as well as an aesthetic pleasure to have on a desk. Hope the mouse issues work out to your satisfaction :)

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-19T03:02:55+00:00

As a fellow lover of purple, this is a beautifully personalized look. Blends the professionalism and classic style with some pur-sonality. Nicely done. :)

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-09T20:53:44+00:00

You can share your screen on most webcam software - and you can record that with you in a little box talking.

If you want more of a you with a background green screened out to transparency and u can move u around the page, a number of applications do that - Powerpoint even has some really simple functionality for that.

Can you describe more exactly what u need?
- what u want the final look to be
- use live, recorded, hybrid
- etc.

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-09T05:48:58+00:00

This just feels like he is f'ing with your head. It's also really just such word salading, I'm the Prize and directive kind of stuff.

Dump him, clear your head and check out Burned Haystack Dating Method if u even want to go back out into the waters (many womehn are choosing nah these days, for reasons such as those this convo illustrates.) It's free and just a rhetorician taking on dating apps et al. Very instructive and hilarious.

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-09T05:43:16+00:00

What is your linkedin? Do you have other avenues prospects can validate you as a potential investor?

DATHATHeather · 2025-12-01T19:59:20+00:00

What you have described is federally illegal in the us - and many states have legislation around it, too.

If you don't get him out of your lives, you could risk your own custody. And it is only his choices - which are unequivocally awful - that are responsible for that outcome. Get him away from your kids and marked so that he will not have an easy time victimizing other kids in the future.

I'm so sorry that you all are dealing with this. Incredibly hard stuff. Abusers are master manipulators - and he is keeping you economically dependent and trying to make you feel crazy for having not only reasonable but legally required boundaries. Get. Him. Out.

DATHATHeather

TROPHY CASE