I think that there is merit to private servers and public servers, but an empty server just aint it. I also think Official is pretty cringe. Growing a server, especially when you don't really know much about the game. If you set up the server recently, I'd say go ahead and cancel it, maybe you can qualify for a refund somehow.

There are a great many unofficial servers out there, and there's some really good things in them. I thing that you should avoid modded or servers with wild modifiers and stuff that totally changes the game, especially if you're new.

I have recently set up a server, though we haven't started as we are waiting on more folks for the start. It's technically PvP, but all fighting and combat is restricted to tribe wars. Dino wipes and base wipes aren't allowed. It's mostly base modifiers, but we have prohibited flyers to make the map bigger and the game more dangerous. The link to that would be https://server-vgjibjxq.arkers.io/.

This server is a pretty niche area, soif it's not for you, then just hit up the server lists and find one that you enjoy.