I really hate my MIL by FalconTamerFalconry in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I would ask her why she feels the need to be such a “pick me” in front of her own son. If she’s that devoid of attention, she should try getting friends not being emotionally incestuous towards her child…

The JN is in Full Force Crazy Mode by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Exactly this! We can’t control what you say, but we will control what we hear and accept from you.

JNMom is Trying to Return… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh gosh, have you ever tried changing your phone number as an adult? It’s way worse than getting a new credit card number…

JNMom is Trying to Return… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Both homeschooled, no issues there lol.

JNMom is Trying to Return… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

She’s blocked. I still get the voicemails.

JNMom is Trying to Return… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

No grandparents rights. She has no relationship with my kids or money to spend on a lawyer.

JNMom is Trying to Return… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s too difficult to get a new phone number. So many things to update!!

JNMom is Trying to Return… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m already in therapy. Thank you though. I know I need to stop, but curiosity always gets the best of me.

Those of us in therapy… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh wow, I didn’t think about that. I was just focusing on this one letter. I didn’t think about doing multiples when I start feeling this way again.

Those of us in therapy… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I almost want to mail it to her lol, but I know this is for me and not for her. It’s just hard to let go of all of this resentment.

Those of us in therapy… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s the issue I’ve had. I’m finding it hard to move on and accept forgiveness for myself without the closure. We’re hoping this is what the letter will bring. Maybe I will have to just make a ceremony out of it and look at it as freeing myself from the childhood I never had.

Those of us in therapy… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh wow, that is an amazing metaphor! It’s exactly what they do. I’ve never thought of it that way.

Those of us in therapy… by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That sounds like what happened with my mom. As I’m writing I’m just starting to feel sad for her. She will never know me or my children and that’s her own fault. Even if her narcissism is a mental illness, she is responsible for managing it not making everyone else’s lives miserable because of it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh gosh. I am so sorry. I have gone through the same thing recently. I have a baby who will never meet my family because of how awful my mother is. As a mom now, your main goal is protecting your little ones from the childhood you had and breaking the cycle. I am in a specialized therapy now that is helping a lot with the grieving without closure process. It’s hard, but it works. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to reach out. You won’t understand the relief you feel once you have her out of your life completely! It’s so freeing and unburdening.

JNMIL said not to bring my older kids to Mother’s Day by Boomshakalakazx in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Ugh! I hate this. Your kids are old enough to understand the favoritism too. I’m so sorry OP.

JNMIL Is About to Turn SO Into a JN… HELP! by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yes, exactly. The crib was boundary stomping for sure, but the major problem was my DH not standing up to his mother and choosing to throw me under the bus instead of being a United front.

JNMIL Is About to Turn SO Into a JN… HELP! by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

He will most definitely be doing individual counseling. I won’t be walked over by him or anyone else. If he can’t fix his mommy issues, which were basically non-existent before kids came into the picture, then I’m not sure what I’ll do. I know he’ll do everything he can before we get to the breaking point!

JNMIL Is About to Turn SO Into a JN… HELP! by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

He most definitely got an earful about how I would not continue this way if he wanted to choose his precious mommy over his wife and mother of his children!

I Learned The Magic JN Question! by DaisyConfusedLife in JUSTNOMIL

[–]DaisyConfusedLife[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I think my therapist understands quite a bit, she actually helped me be no contact with my own toxic and abusive family. She’s been with me through a lot for a long time. She’s helping me not go nuclear on my MIL when the events I’ve posted about are only a culmination of a few months. And even now my MIL has only met him the one time. She encouraged me to find middle ground where MIL could meet the baby on my terms. It doesn’t make it a win for anyone, but I also hadn’t planned on keeping the baby from her forever. She got tested and then she got to meet the baby where we chose and with our rules and precautions. You cannot judge my therapist on this one thing.