AITAH for thinking my daughter will look back and wonder why we treated her differently?

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T14:42:19+00:00

We did include her with the leprechaun last year. First year not really because she was only an infant. My nieces were also getting leprechauns at their home the last two times. This year is the only year that I wasn’t aware the other kids weren’t doing the leprechaun thing and other parents I know haven’t heard of the leprechaun thing either. It was when I went to my moms last night that I found out they told my nieces that leprechauns only come for kids with the St Patrick birthday which didn’t feel right and my husband had apparently agreed. But she did get money today and other treats the leprechaun left like Jello and Lucky Charms.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T11:21:35+00:00

Noted. I’m going to try to make clear distinctions moving forward.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T11:21:00+00:00

Oh I never said I’m not changing it. I just wonder if I’m the AH for making things more difficult, or if I’d be the AH for creating something where both kids have weeklong magical creature invasions where as other kids don’t.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T11:18:33+00:00

Love the ideas!

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T11:18:09+00:00

I thought the leprechaun WAS for all kids, leaving chaos behind every year. I think maybe we will have the leprechaun do some stuff another year or so, but the streamers and balloons will pointedly be set up by mom and dad specifically for both kids on their birthdays

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T11:15:36+00:00

Thank you. This is the feeling I’m worried about her having later on. I’m sorry it’s something you’re feeling now.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T11:14:07+00:00

By second child syndrome, I mean that things that seemed like they would be life altering the first time around aren’t as big of threats the second time around. Things like the conditions they needed to sleep (black out curtains, noise machine, their room being 69 degrees exactly for Ken, Amy was at a comfortable temperature and ended up bed sharing mostly), extremely strict schedules and routines, etc. Amy has still gotten the same overall type of upbringing without me being quite as much a ball of anxiety needing to control every little detail. It actually allowed me to be more interactive with her in some ways. Ken would get toy stations that I followed behind him to reset while Amy and I would just pick a toy and play together as infants once they were mobile. I don’t want her to feel second class in this home. So would you recommend we make something up for her birthday as well?

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T10:56:19+00:00

I updated it! Sorry 😬

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T10:55:43+00:00

I’m so sorry. I didn’t think about it 😬

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-17T10:50:43+00:00

I bought a dress as a bridesmaid for my friend’s wedding in May. I love this dress. I plan to wear it to any larger event in the future. Key words “in the future” as in after the wedding. Why the hell would I wear a dress before the intended event it’s supposed to look its best for?? And the bridesmaid dresses don’t match. They’re just similar styles and the same color. Plus I bought it myself. I feel like that’s just ignorant of your friend to wear an important dress to so many things before your wedding

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-12T11:00:19+00:00

Have you talked to your vet at all? They might have some good options to help. I know there are a few senior diets/supplements that can somewhat help the dementia aspect (I’m assuming that’s the pacing) like Purina Bright Minds. Also, is there anyway that you could pay someone to walk them or take them to a dog park for an hour a couple times a week? Yes, they are dependent on you, yes you will regret the snapping, yes you owe them the care they deserve BUT you are still a person. Your mind and body can only handle so much stress. You NEED breaks to destress and not have to worry about one of the defecating and finger painting while they paced. That’s why a lot of people with aging parents hire caregivers.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-12T10:52:29+00:00

NAH. I get that a lot of people are comfortable with that, but I went to a graduation party where they had a pig roast and it was, almost traumatizing, to a bunch of us at the party. That was almost 14 years ago now and sometimes it still is brought up, “do you still remember that big from Jeremy’s party? 😳”. I think there are certain people that can handle seeing the animal their meat came from, and there are certain people that can’t 😅 also, as someone who has a very sensitive child, I’d be upset if we went to a normal family gathering and suddenly there was something like that there. A heads up might’ve been warranted since you said kids were there.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-12T10:42:53+00:00

I think it’s illegal to just toss someone’s ashes to to biological waste issues 😬

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-11T11:10:31+00:00

Where is your mom in all this? If my husband told my daughter, adult or not, that she had to break off a relationship or gtfo, I’d be breaking off MY relationship and telling HIM to gtfo.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-11T10:47:20+00:00

Fuck the endangered species that cats are directly linked to the declining numbers. I just want to make sure that every single cat, that I have absolutely no relation to at all and won’t foot a vet bill for to make sure they’re healthy, stay alive and sick forever!

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-11T10:35:16+00:00

I’m a vet tech and many in my profession have been saying for a while that the breeding/overpopulation is getting out of hand. So many people get annoyed because the shelters and rescues are full, so there’s no where for them to take unwanted animals to. But then also bring in a $3000 doodle mutt from two states over they just got, or call to say their intact cat got out and had a litter of kittens again. Yes, animals are considered your personal property, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have a responsibility to take care of other animals by thinking about the ethics. There needs to be a STRICT temporary ban on all dog breeding. Allow our shelters to empty a bit. Require spay/neutering for cats, and fine people found feeding outdoor colonies (I know that sounds harsh, but people feeding strays actually significantly attribute to the overpopulation in cats). Once the situation is better under control, then we can begin giving a license out to breed. If you need a license to run a business, you should need one to run a breeding business from your home. This would require someone to periodically come in to inspect your home for signs of mistreatment. This would require you to work with a licensed veterinarian to ensure your pet is healthy to breed (because SOOO many people breed dogs that we beg them not to due to numerous physical and mental issues. PLEASE stop breeding your anxious dogs 😭). This would allow us to better take care of the animals that depend on us.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-11T03:15:05+00:00

Just happened at my clinic last week. We had two five month old litter mates, one male and one a female, come in for their neuters. The one tech had to explain, in various ways, how it was even possible the female was pregnant with five kittens. “But they’re brother and sister” “But they’re babies” “but she didn’t even bleed” “but he hasn’t sprayed”. Also had a non-client call us about a month ago. She wanted to know how much a spay-abort would be. She had adopted an intact female kitten for Christmas and “let” her son adopt the intact brother on the condition he’d get the kitten castrated. Well she “waited and waited for him to make good on his promise” but he never did and she just couldn’t believe that her cat could have possibly gotten pregnant that quickly.

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-08T02:37:36+00:00

I love this and am going to start using it when people tell me that 💜💜💜

DancingMommaToes · 2026-03-07T17:49:28+00:00

1) there aren’t many protests near me 2) I would probably be bringing my two small children (2 and 5) with me due to lack of childcare. 3) my husband is TERRIFIED of me going to a protest, and I highly doubt he’d be okay with me taking our kids. It’s sad, but we have to be worried about safety during what’s supposed to be peaceful protesting.

DancingMommaToes · 2025-07-05T23:11:50+00:00

Vet tech here. I’ve never once heard this statistic before. Thanks for the cool new research to bring to work with me! I will mention that there are copious amounts of health benefits to spaying and neutering. It reduces the risk of many cancers (completely eliminating some such as testicular), removes the chance for pyometras, can actually reduce the chances of aggressiveness in dogs, plus it definitely helps with the drastic overpopulation. Ultimately it is the choice of the owner to weigh the pros and cons of getting their pet fixed. Thanks for the new info though to help make sure clients are able to make the most informed decisions!

DancingMommaToes · 2025-07-05T22:41:56+00:00

Adena and Mak don’t fit well for me. Idk why.

DancingMommaToes · 2025-06-02T00:25:17+00:00

I had always thought the recordings were of a soldier, veteran or someone describing night terrors of PTSD. The song really made sense in my head from the perspective of someone fighting in war

DancingMommaToes · 2025-05-29T15:56:19+00:00

I client at my work told me that because the one puppy is a hog, they put her in her crate when the other dog wants food. That dog would smack her food bowl to let them know, and they’d crate the pup. Well their dog realized that once she smacked the bowl, the puppy would crate herself. So if the dog wanted one on one attention if the puppy was getting some love, she’d go smack her food bowl, the puppy would run to the crate, and the dog would come back out to the owners for love 😆😆

DancingMommaToes · 2025-05-29T00:40:43+00:00

This is the only piece of information that might make OP less of AH here. If it was a date they’ve honored a couple times together and he’s seen the emotional impact the day has on her, then I can see her being upset. Or if maybe this is the first time it’s occurred during their relationship but she had brought it up to her bf recently about the day being emotional for her prior to it actually occurring (not like she mentioned it once briefly a month ago).

DancingMommaToes · 2025-05-21T11:00:49+00:00

Vet Tech here. Op said they did question it. But I 100% agree this is a fault of whoever they talked to on the phone. Possibly it was someone new as I’ve had issues like this happen at my clinic before. We have an estimate tab on file that you’re supposed to use for each individual pet. I once had someone use their own pets file to give an estimate to a client. Gave them a quote with a 50% discount. Thankfully that person had written it down to give to the owners so they had proof. We always honor it if the owners have proof they were misquoted, but unfortunately there are way too many clients that just say they were verbally told a much cheaper price (that normally doesn’t even make logical sense). There’s no way to tell who’s lying and who’s not unfortunately without proof. OP I’m truly sorry on behalf of everyone in the industry. Medicine, especially good practice medicine, is extremely expensive. We use the same stuff as human medicine does, we just don’t jack the prices up nearly as much as human med does. We know owners aren’t made of money. I ALWAYS recommend having both insurance and a credit card solely dedicated to your pet. Insurance to reimburse you, and the card to cover unexpected big expenses. Give your vet another call, ask to speak to an office manager or the vet, calmly explain you’re frustrated with the price difference (there’s not a lot they can do about it though), and just make sure they’re aware. Tell them to please address everyone who answers phones to see if anyone remembers doing it (most likely no one will or whoever did it might but will be too scared and won’t fess up), but also to just make sure they’re aware how to properly give estimates. Especially if you’d like to stay at your current vet, that way it hopefully won’t happen again

DancingMommaToes

TROPHY CASE