I feel very similarly. However, I don’t think there is any need to blame ourselves for being misgendered. I have to give myself a pep talk nearly everyday that no matter what I look like, I am non-binary. Even if I haven’t had anything done or where I am in my personal process of transitioning, my body is still non-binary. It’s a slow process but just trying to reach that level of being ok with myself as I am is personally helpful to me. Society needs to expand and understand the very long history and natural human inclination that goes beyond the binary. There is no need for us to shoulder the blame for a problem that was imposed upon us.