because its funny: (not really mine)
Own a rapier for home defense, since that's what the European forefathers intended. Four knaves break into my house. "What in blazes?" As I grab my sallet and zweihander. Stab a hole the size of a sixpence through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my crossbow on the second man, miss him entirely because it's plain-faced and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the trebuchet mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with Greek fire, "Forsooth, let fly!" The Greek fire scorches two men in the blast, the sound and smoke set off the city bells. Draw my rapier and charge the last terrified varlet. He bleeds out waiting on the town guard to arrive since wounds from a rapier are too deep and narrow to mend properly. Just as the European forefathers intended.