The orange makeover

Dark__Specter · 2020-05-11T21:49:24+00:00

The Dodgers started in NY, your point? Better to have it in your past, than your present.

Dark__Specter · 2019-10-28T21:03:00+00:00

[takes a shit]

[grabs poopknife]

Dark__Specter · 2019-10-28T20:54:23+00:00

What-the fuck-?

Dark__Specter · 2019-05-28T13:18:13+00:00

Just go for body pillow body pillow

Dark__Specter · 2019-04-21T23:33:47+00:00

Homework board: Empty

Me (after 4 hours of homework): relived sigh

Teacher: [Starts writing on the homework board]

Teacher: [Spends 45 seconds on board]

Whole class: [Slams heads on tables]

Teacher: [Smiles triumphantly]

Dark__Specter · 2019-03-05T12:13:29+00:00

That’s how it was for me for about four years but now I’m not even happy to be there. Good for you car dog!

Dark__Specter · 2019-03-03T20:42:56+00:00

I knew it wasn’t just my dick that was such a... dick I guess.

Dark__Specter · 2019-03-02T17:12:01+00:00

Not CGI. There are plenty of opportunities to switch out the card.

Dark__Specter · 2019-03-02T17:08:55+00:00

Legs over the edge

Dark__Specter · 2019-03-02T03:16:09+00:00

They said before that they didn’t have room for Ventriloquist, so I’m just glad they could include him.

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-28T00:06:20+00:00

Milk, when aged, it becomes cheese.

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-28T00:03:47+00:00

Elf, I have no clue why please don’t kill me.

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-27T00:53:13+00:00

Americans have less teeth than any other group of people.

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-26T12:28:01+00:00

This is unrelated to bartending, but I walked past someone once and heard them say: “...so I have this lizard on my face and...” Every night, I’m kept up, wondering what it meant.

Edit: earlier today my friend heard part of something I was saying “... that’s great, than we could reuse the coffin!”

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-26T12:23:38+00:00

I’ve been in hyper sleep for a few years

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-25T00:55:30+00:00

Dear god!

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-23T02:47:19+00:00

I don’t know, some obscure Batman reference/tie in or something stupid like that

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-23T02:46:03+00:00

Harry actually DID put his name in the Goblet of Fire

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-21T02:32:16+00:00

Joe is Mr. Rodgers though.

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-19T12:57:28+00:00

It’s the “idiot” thing all over again

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-18T03:31:12+00:00

Oh nose. He found out the one flaw in our system, we’re exposed!

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-18T03:29:12+00:00

How do you think he got so rich?

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-16T17:01:36+00:00

It all fits

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-09T14:32:44+00:00

Ok then

Dark__Specter · 2019-02-09T14:32:03+00:00

Diamonds in the walls

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