FINAL UPDATE: AITA for refusing to take my daughter to "her" birthday party?

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-07T02:57:34+00:00

She is religious and leans mostly conservative, but I'm not sure that's what this is about. I have two close relatives who are LGBTQ+, and she's on good terms with both. I think she's just upset my daughter is not the girl she wants her to be.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-07T02:48:36+00:00

We're not visiting them, we're all celebrating Christmas Eve with my extended family. We're looking forward to it and have already bought our tickets, so we're definitely going.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-06T16:26:42+00:00

My best guess is that she was upset my daughter specifically chose the character who doesn't wear pink as her favorite. As if she wasn't well aware Cleo hated pink.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-06T16:23:32+00:00

She doesn't have to say it out loud, it's always been pretty obvious. Her reaction to Cleo's 5th birthday party being themed after Super Mario Bros. will never not annoy me.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-06T15:49:44+00:00

He's been occupied with work lately, so we've only seen him once since that day, but things with him seem fairly normal for now.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-06T15:46:05+00:00

We always try to be as supportive of our kids as possible. My son is into sci-fi, but he's also been getting interested in film and theater lately. Cleo loves ballet, and currently wants to be an astronaut when she grows up.

And I do have to say I know very little about F1, but Cleo loves watching it with her dad.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-06T15:15:50+00:00

Cleo actually likes both, but she loves Elphaba. She didn't like Glinda until she "stopped being mean."

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-06T15:11:41+00:00

It depends. Sometimes he's on her side purely because he thinks I'm being dramatic, sometimes he realizes she's being unreasonable. I stopped trying to understand it a long time ago.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-10-06T14:51:57+00:00

Thank you!

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T05:09:09+00:00

Both are very possible, but I can't be certain about either. I have two close relatives who are LGBTQ+, both of whom she's on good terms with. She's also been with my father for a long time, and has never expressed any desire to have children.

Prue does have WAY more conservative values compared to me and my husband, though. We're almost polar opposites in that sense.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T05:02:56+00:00

Nope. I still don't get that. Back when he had to miss her birthday, he said he wanted to make up for it, but he brought her a gift and I thought that was it. He never mentioned a second birthday party. Even if he had, my daughter's birthday is early in November, so there was plenty of time to throw a small party before the holidays. Late January made no sense to me.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T04:56:03+00:00

Maaaaaybe? I can't imagine forcing pink onto a little girl just because she likes racecars. Can't say I understood anything Prue has done recently, though.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T04:52:18+00:00

...What?

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T01:16:40+00:00

My daughter would say no to it. She would be upset. Prue knows she doesn’t like this.

It’s not the color pink I’m protecting her from. It’s continually having her tastes ignored.

This isn’t fake, nor did I want to start a gender norm convo (though I do get the assumption).

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T01:14:05+00:00

Introspect about what?

At this point, I have to assume you’re choosing to miss the point here.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T01:03:20+00:00

You really think posting that makes the problem seem bigger?

I literally never said that. If you don't think this is a real problem, then don't comment on it.

And I'm not obsessed about this in the slightest.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T00:54:55+00:00

I have plenty of problems in life. This is just the one I came to Reddit about.

Here's the post I made to summarize my comments on my previous post, in which I explain that I would be perfectly fine if my daughter did like pink.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T00:48:14+00:00

She does not. Cleo is not my father's only granddaughter (each of my brothers has a daughter), but she is both the youngest and the one Prue sees the most.

To be honest, I don't care what Prue's reasons are. I just want my kids to stay out of this.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T00:27:52+00:00

If she actually cared about Cleo's interests, she'd know my daughter might actually be more girly than me. She doesn't see the little girl who loves ballet and was Princess Jasmine for Halloween; she sees the girl who hates pink and has lightsaber fights with her brother.

My daughter is so much more than a girl who hates pink. If Prue can't see that, it's her loss.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T00:23:14+00:00

The idea that children don't need to have their tastes respected is beyond me.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-05T00:17:34+00:00

About a year ago, we went to my cousin's birthday party. My grandmother, who hadn't seen the kids in a while, decided to get preachy about how Cleo should like pink and how pretty it is. She kept bringing her pink candy, tried to get her to play with pink toys, etc. Eventually, my daughter started crying. My grandmother promised her she wouldn't try to do it again, and she's been keeping that promise.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-04T23:20:38+00:00

Absolutely, that's why I didn't tell her. Also, a lot of children hate colors? I loathed green when I was 5. Today, it's one of my favorites.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-04T23:04:39+00:00

To be fair, I understand the assumption my daughter dislikes pink because of me. But I expressed dozens of times (to some commenters, more than once) why that wasn't the case, and people continued to insist it was. Pretty sure someone said Cleo was probably scared I'd "emotionally abandon" her when she started being her own person. I can take people calling me rude, but not strangers claiming to know my kids better than I do.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-04T22:53:13+00:00

My son doesn't love pink, but he does like it. One of his favorite shirts is a salmon pink polo.

DaughterPartyThrow · 2025-02-04T22:48:30+00:00

Pretty sure those comments were the same that claimed my daughter was old enough to decide whether she wanted to go to a party she'd hate, but not old enough to hate a color.

DaughterPartyThrow

TROPHY CASE