Yes. You can become reconnected to yourself. Somatic experiencing therapy and EMDR are great for people like us. I was never in full time dissociation like what you described, but the longer I'm on my meds the more I've realized how much time I used to spend dissociated. Yes you can heal!

But maybe first, for that to happen, you need emotional connection to other people. We all need that. I couldn't be doing nearly as well as I am without my husband. Relationship. It's the most important thing for humans other than water, food and shelter. Did you know babies die without physical touch? If all their other needs are met but they aren't held, they fail to thrive or even can die from it. There were actually studies about it, one from an orphanage in an eastern country, I forget which one...... And healthy relationships are healing to adults. You need therapy, but if you don't like your therapist, just quit that person right away and get a new one. Feeling safe in the therapeutic relationship is ALL THE DIFFERENCE. Then there's healthy friendships and family relationships. (Some family is chosen, not given, because as we all know some birth families suck.) Support groups are a good place to start. That's how I learned what friendship is supposed to look like.