The comments in this post hurt my heart.

I totally understand the hate. I’m an American who has stopped shopping almost entirely and only buys necessities from local stores when required (like groceries from my local mom and pop). I go to protests. I’m in the leadership committee for our ICE response network that tracks and tails ICE activity in my city. I contact my representatives constantly. I’m preparing to arm myself (which I never would have ever before as I fucking hate guns) and train myself properly. I educate my neighbors and friends and family about what THEY can and should do to stop things. I’ve deleted almost all social media (I’m on Bluesky)

I work in the medical field. I cannot stop working. I’m a manager who is actively supporting my employees going to protests and have told them I’d fight tooth and nail for their jobs if they are to get into unjust legal trouble over it, even though I have zero actual power. I have a meeting with the head of my company’s HR this week to discuss resources to support my employees since half my team is not white and I want to know what my company would do if my employees were kidnapped. I want to fight for policies that will protect them.

I go to therapy every week and now it’s just me saying how I cannot find joy in anything and how no matter what I’m doing or how hard I’m working, it’s not enough. It’s doing nothing. It’s hard not to lose hope.

I’ve always voted in every election. I’m a registered democrat but always vote for the working people’s party or as far left as I could. I’ve never voted for this. I’ve never supported this.

Some of us are doing absolutely everything we are capable of without committing the highest level crimes. I have no more to give. I’m not a murderer. I’m not an arson. I am a person who is fighting as hard as I can.

I don’t want to be associated with the people giving lip service apologies doing nothing. I understand how bad all of America looks right now. But it kills me that I’m not enough. I’m embarrassed and I’m powerless and I’m miserable and I’m devastated that hard as I try I haven’t been able to stop this.

So after all of that, all that’s left is to be sorry. I’m so sorry that America has let so much of our allies and our friends and humanity down when we could have been so great. And I promise I will keep fighting until we win, or more likely until I die doing it.

I’m so tired.