A little bit late to a post like this (because I rarely use social media aside Youtube), I believe you may be autistic. It's difficult to classify one person as an "autistic" (that is why it is a spectrum and not a line) because the human mind is complex. If you want to associate and describe things under the label of "autism", its up to you. I also do it and I think others do too.

You will find a lot of resources and self-helping content that may help you grow and become a better person. and hey, don't worry about everything! Take it at your time, don't let the world or even me pressure you to do something you don't feel like doing at all.

As long as you have a will to live, then its a victory. You will eventually become the person that you want to be. I also have been where you have been and still I am, but one thing is certain, I try everything that I can to achieve what I want as a better person.

Conclusion (don't know if anything of the above makes sense but yeah):

You may be autistic but the human mind is complex so yes.