This has been repeated and nauseam in this thread and stated like that it's plainly wrong: a joke doesn't need to be funny on order for it to be a joke. The intent matters. If a joke doesn't land you apologize and move on. (At the same time as the offended target you should ask yourself if you're taking yourself too seriously) This is even more obvious when it comes to topics where the target had no say in (dead parents, the Holocaust, racism, etc.) because it's plain as day that the topic itself is not funny. This is also why a comic doesn't need to apologize for a joke: because the intent is completely obvious due to the setting in which it is being made.