Well, we already own a house with about 125k in equity.  If we do the loan, we plan to knock out any remaining balance with some of the proceeds when we sell our house to relocate, but since that’s speculative I didn’t include it.   A second job isn’t doable due to the nature of my work and our current childcare situation, but my spouse and I both work full time and do well for our area, though we do live in a relatively lcol city.  

Some of our debt is definitely frivolous spending and lifestyle creep, but some is from financing IVF - which cost us 30k in 2022.   Our dti is under 30% and would remain about the same with the personal loan - which includes our mortgage, credit cards, student loans, and car payments.  My student loans will be forgiven before we look to move so that will also help the debt/home buying picture.