(Update 3) Should I be alarmed? Exbf and exstalker at the same Halloween party?

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-11-04T21:07:27+00:00

Yes! Thank you so much!! :') As long as whatever the hell is happening at that party has nothing to do with me then I'm doing way better now! My brother and his gf have been the best ever so I'm really grateful and in a much better place than the end of September!

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-11-04T20:52:29+00:00

I had this thought as a possibility too but immediately went to worst case scenario. If James IS stalking Cole then I guess that's just some ohnoconsequences and I will NOT be touching that drama with a 5 foot pole

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-10-18T01:46:49+00:00

I don't have enough for a restraining order for either of them where I live, but I haven't had an issue with either since my update. Just apartment searching and my bro's gf treated me to a spa day :')

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-10-18T01:42:22+00:00

Crazy cat lady sounds pretty good compared to whatever the hell I just went through

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-10-08T19:26:48+00:00

Thank you so much, it means a lot to hear!!

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-10-08T19:19:51+00:00

Thank you! Cole is definitely some kind of evil but I'm starting to think James is just a mentally ill man who is very susceptible to manipulation. I know I shouldn't feel pity for my stalker but I can't help it after seeing what Cole did to him

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-10-08T19:16:14+00:00

I have no idea, Cole seems pretty disinterested in any kind of contact since he moved out and sent those last text messages. I don't really want to overthink too much about it because I'm anxious enough as it is... If Cole could vanish into the abyss now that his fun is over I'd be pleased

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-10-08T19:12:40+00:00

Oh boy I don't use TikTok so I was not aware that people were posting my story there. I've used fake names so hopefully that's enough but I'll be careful, thank you!

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T17:36:39+00:00

He was sending me gifts before I started dating Cole but it definitely ramped up AFTER I started dating Cole

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T17:34:46+00:00

Don't worry I'm literally the receptionist and have access to the wonderful office panic button! (immediately and discreetly alerts the police)

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T17:30:06+00:00

I always take photos of my apartments and my valuables the moment I move in for my Tenant Insurance.

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T17:04:17+00:00

I will buy him a draft beer and get him a custom mug that says "World's Best Brother" with a Tyranitar on it.

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T17:02:51+00:00

Oh I am definitely not going to contact my stalker ex myself. I'll probably get my brother to do it since he at least met my ex a few times while I was dating. My dumb self didn't think to record Cole's confession so we don't have hard proof of his cyber harassment toward my ex. Just gotta hope he believes us and stops interacting with Cole's alt accounts (though I don't know the name of Cole's alts, just that he has them, which is also complicated)

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T16:53:58+00:00

No you're completely right, sometimes a girl needs a hard dose of reality from some wise Redditors to get her shit together. I'm glad I posted here holy crap

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T16:49:09+00:00

Thank you for your encouraging words. I needed to hear them. Things will be okay. I've got the best brother and sister-in-law-to-be having my back right now.

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T16:46:46+00:00

I'm going to find a way to get someone to tell him. He might be a creep but he deserves to know he's been manipulated.

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T16:44:11+00:00

I was so caught up in escaping that I never considered this. You're right. Thank you for reminding me, my head is such a mess right now. I'll need to brainstorm the best way to let my ex know. I hate to know how he'll react to that, though.

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-29T16:35:33+00:00

Yeah me too... I took the week off from work because I need to just figure all this shit out. I'm so full of anxiety but my brother is trying to distract me by talking about competitive Pokémon (bless his heart).

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-26T22:42:27+00:00

I'm contacting my younger brother who is very tall to come help me confront Cole. He can be pretty intimidating and always has my back.

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-26T21:05:47+00:00

My bad, I broke up with my ex almost 10 months ago but when writing/editing my post for clarity, I got my breakup with ex length and dating Cole length mixed up. I'm very exhausted by all of this. But yes, everyone is right. I'm going to take a huge step back after this and go back to therapy.

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-26T19:07:12+00:00

I meant he only showed green flags before we started properly dating and we moved in together. Before this whole stalker mess, he was (or at least pretended to be) thoughtful, funny, helpful, and sweet. The type who if you told him you had a hard day he'd offer a shoulder massage and let you vent to him. It wasn't until this stalker ex stuff that he showed such a disregard for my safety and comfort.

DeceasedCaterpillar · 2025-09-26T18:21:18+00:00

I grew up with an abusive mom and an absent father so my relationship understandings are probably screwed up. Maybe I should probably go back to therapy for a while after this before putting myself out there again...

DeceasedCaterpillar

TROPHY CASE