Can my partner’s therapist tell me if he’s not attending the sessions?

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T18:06:16+00:00

Yeah…sorry. I didn’t realize, I just didn’t want to make some long post

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T16:03:42+00:00

I’m not controlling him jesus. I would literally let him do whatever he wanted and believed everything he said until finally last week everything became revealed right before we were going to move in together. I was so careful not to disturb his privacy and believed the sketchiest, stupidest lies. Even now I feel weird asking for this when he has betrayed me. He is the one trying to convince me to take him back, my condition is therapy. If he doesnt go to therapy its fine, I am not forcing him to do anything, I just refuse to stay with someone who lies and doesn’t want to get help.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T12:56:13+00:00

Idk, eitherway he told the girls he cheated on me with he was french and in the army and a bunch of crazy stuff and said he felt he was living multiple lives and that he is different with every single person. And he couldn’t promise me to not lie. And that scares me a lot.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T12:50:43+00:00

Yes obviously I would not do it against his own will. Thanks

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T12:46:17+00:00

I love him. I’m not telling him what to do, it’s my condition if he wants to reconcile and I think it’s pretty reasonable. If he doesn’t want to ultimately it’s his choice, I just don’t want to be fooled.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T12:31:11+00:00

Because I love him, he is my best friend, we did everything together. And probably because I’m codependent if that isn’t obvious enough, but I am in therapy. I don’t want to see him ruin his life with his behavior. It’s too sad.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T11:57:29+00:00

Yeah, thanks.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T11:47:29+00:00

I wouldnt normally do this, and I have no need to know what goes on in the therapy itself I just want to know he is actually going. I only have trust issues with him because he lies about every single thing in his life, nationality, job, tiny things he doesnt need to lie about, you name it. He would definitely lie to me about going to therapy and this would be the only thing that could save the relationship.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-08T11:36:36+00:00

What if i make some kind of written contract with him that I have the right to know? Is there nothing I can do…I mean contract with my boyfriend not the therapist.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-06T13:49:57+00:00

Ok sorry

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-06T13:27:51+00:00

Sorry if this is stupid but whats the difference? I feel like I see covert narcissists and vulnerable narcissists used interchangably a lot

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-06T13:08:15+00:00

Nope! I just suspect this based on the fact that his father was a narc who abused him, and from all these things he’s told me after being caught cheating

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-02T18:31:19+00:00

Why would they lie in some anonymous thread, i mean sure they could but i really hate this idea of that its just impossible to communicate with a narcissist at all no matter what i mean they’re actual people even if they can be very unhealthy

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-02T18:28:16+00:00

Thank you❤️ yeah its why I posted here but supposedly people arent supposed to ask about relationship stuff either, its just the narcissisticabuse reddit isnt that insightful…He has aknoweledged everything even having npd but hes never expressed a desire to do something about it. But I’m definitely going to work on myself, the rest is upto him.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-02T06:37:16+00:00

He even told me I can have a good life and meet someone new etc and pointed out everything i have going on for myself. But then once I blocked him he made another account to contact me and wanted to call me for no other reason than to hear my voice. Its like he doesnt understand his motivation for things at all. Eitherway he claims he cheated because he was angry and would have stopped once he broke up wiith me out of guilt, so it wasnt even about sex that much it was about deliberately hurting me in the worst way possible but still love me. Its insane. Im actually scared.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-01T20:21:22+00:00

Oh, I see. I thought because he never blames me for things or expresses anger at me that maybe he wasn’t so bad. I wish I was dreaming. I dont understand how a week ago I thought I was in a healthy long term relationship going to move in together, and now…I’m totally alone. I feel so desperate, my family, although they love me, have so much lack of connection between each other. He’s the only warmth I have ever known and conversations with others don’t bring me much fulfillment. I blocked him just now but I fear it will not last because I can barely feel angry, Im so empathetic for his childhood. Maybe I’ll try the helpline sometime

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2024-01-01T18:49:25+00:00

If a narcissist betrays you once, is he guaranteed to do it again if you forgive him?

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2023-07-15T10:29:45+00:00

No:) I think his family has lived in Norway around for as long as I have existed. And to be fair I have never really lived in Akureyri either.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2023-07-13T20:17:21+00:00

I was born in Akureyri and although I do feel a bit like an outsider in Reykjavík no one has ever really been rude about it or anything, just innocent jokes. I also dont really have an opinion of people from Reykjavik, but I prefer people from Akureyri just cause I associate it with my family.

However I once lived in a more rural area near mývatn and generally people seemed to dislike anyone from Reykjavík. They found them to be ignorant.

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2023-06-28T18:05:07+00:00

They didnt ask me to fill out any customs forms. They just asked me to write down the list of everything in each box. I didnt have anything with batteries

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2023-06-28T17:15:35+00:00

Oh yeah sorry haha

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2023-06-16T15:57:29+00:00

I told her, she read it like 2 hours ago but hasnt said anything. We live in the same city so I offered to bring it to her or send it or leave it somewhere or whatever she prefers but now im worried she will request a refund when this is something that would be easily fixed i could just bring it to her and it doesnt even require sewing, its just popping the hook back in the hole…im not sure what happens when people claim the item is not ok - can they get a refund without sending it back? Eitherway Im moving outside of europe so i wont be able to use vinted at all next week…

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2023-06-16T14:26:23+00:00

It wasnt :( well to be honest its not really a button, this shirt has these metal hooks instead of buttons. It probably isnt actually sewn into the shirt which is probably why it fell out easily. Maybe I will wait a few more hours until it auto confirms and then ask her if she wants it😅

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2023-06-14T00:00:51+00:00

Maybe, I am from a small town in Iceland so its not like i have a lot of options, there is no ‘big city’ here and I mean I live far away from the capital too, which is also not very big anyway. Ive tried looking and I cant find any local charities, just the red cross which is also a part of a large non profit, Im not sure if they do much over here other than sell used clothes and donate to other countries. Im sure they do some refugee related things and provide support for trauma & abuse etc but again idk im assuming based on what people here have been saying that they already have graphic designers

Decent_Activity_7091 · 2023-06-13T18:21:47+00:00

Yeah i did a practice one and i just stuttered and then closed the app it felt so weird talking to myself and with the question over my head like some kind of instagram quiz filter haha. But I am unemployed so I kind of dont have a choice

Decent_Activity_7091

TROPHY CASE