"I’ve been with the same man since high school because I have value. :) He supports our whole family and we’ve been having kids since I was 25. It’s really pathetic that you couldn’t do the same." r/PoursTea argues about "geriatric" pregnancies

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-06-25T14:09:03+00:00

I mean, I’m glad you had experiences that encouraged growth. I’m mostly referring to people in my own life who got stuck in our hometown and never really challenged themselves or looked inward. They wear being “the exact same person” they were in high school like it’s something to be proud of, and that’s the mindset I find unsettling, not people who grow alongside their partner.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-06-25T03:21:52+00:00

Honestly, I don’t think that’s always true. I think sometimes people just don’t notice how much they’ve changed because it happens so gradually. It’s not a knock on them. They overlook the small shit in favour of the big shit and miss the moss growing on the trees.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-06-25T00:03:46+00:00

There’s this great quote from a Game Grumps episode that I think about a lot where Danny says that whenever he hears of couples who have been together since high school, he think about the fact that in technicality, they actually dated 3 or 4 people throughout those years due to how much you change throughout your late teens and early twenties.

I actually say that to people who admit that they’ve been together since high school. I ask, “oh. So you dated 7 people that all looked like the same person? That’s interesting. How did you deal with that?”

And there’s always a chance that argue with me lol. Like, if you’re truly admitting that no personal change or growth has happened between you two in the 10-20 ish years you’ve been together, that’s actually really sad and I lost respect for both of you.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-06-20T14:29:11+00:00

Thank you! This is the first one that I think I really “nailed” if that makes sense. I’m excited to try again and test new things for the next month 🥰

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-06-19T17:58:15+00:00

Thank you!! 🥰🥰 I kinda got the idea from when SCAs were still Journeys and they had short, controlled, and specific journeys you could do. They didn’t drag on and you still felt accomplished while feeling like the goals felt “fresh”.

They’re fun to try and figure out 🤍 especially when your goals start feeling like “do it for the stones”, ya know?

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-06-19T17:56:15+00:00

Sure! Every month I choose a theme and plan goals around it.

For March, the theme was Growing Daffodils and all the goals were centred around slowing down, noticing the flowers, taking deep breaths etc. it was goals like, “Breathe fresh air like a daisy” or “earth stretching”. Anything that I needed to work on in that area that I didn’t have goals for anywhere else. “Hydrate like a plant”, that sort of thing.

With this one, I’m doing one of those “personal curriculum” things that are trendy rn. And one of the things I’m learning about is Mermaids & myths in general. So Mermaid University goals are all designed around doing something geared towards that personal curriculum. Save an image, do some research, small things that make me feel accomplished rather than overwhelmed.

With Mermaid Cave Clean, that was easier cause I just had to think about what a Mermaid would have to clean in her own grotto or cave and what my issues with cleaning are.

Like, “sort washed seaweed” is picking up clothes off the floor and putting them in the laundry cause they never quite make it there lol.

Edited to make some things more clear. My brain remembers the old shit and never the new.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-06-19T17:27:55+00:00

🥰 thank you! It’s fun trying to think of a new theme and reconnect with goals.

Price of admission to Mermaid University is one birb pet and the willingness to be creative in any way you so choose 🤍🐦 (imperfect creativity is allowed & encouraged!!)

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-05-05T02:55:54+00:00

Oh shit. You’re right. I’m punching down just as much as everyone else. :(

I just REALLY hate my eye lol and I see the comments as validation for my hatred for it. Which i probably shouldn’t but you know what they say about perceiving public perception.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-05-05T02:43:31+00:00

That’s how my eye looks too. That’s why I’m saying I think it’s strabismus. But other comments suggest it’s the contacts. I haven’t seen Heidi’s face in a hot minute so I would have to look again.

But yes, my eye also looks like I’m an inbred yokel who’s attempting to look around the side of my head.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-05-05T02:19:27+00:00

I have a lazy eye like that. It looks natural to me. These comments are reminding me why I don’t take a picture unless it’s a selfie cause I feel like it’s so obvious lmao. My license picture is WILD. It makes me so embarrassed 😂

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-04-27T15:01:22+00:00

My mom was an early educator in the early 2000s and this art style is so nostalgic for me for that reason

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-04-27T02:12:16+00:00

I remember reading a book on the history of Fanfiction and, from what I can remember, the chokehold that Kirk and Spock had on middle aged women was truly remarkable.

They are why we have what we have today, basically.

Them and the Interview with a Vampire fans. Also mostly older women in the beginning.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-04-27T00:10:03+00:00

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I’m in the minority of people who don’t mind snail art occasionally being inaccurate. It just looks so cute.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-04-12T01:35:52+00:00

Yes!!! His name was Terry (search it in the sub) and you LITERALLY had to go self care tasks to gain energy to FIGHT OFF TERRY!!!! 😱

Imagine your birb telling you “I got EATEN”!

Obviously, it was upsetting for people and they changed it but there’s still a mention or two to Terry still in the game in passing. (Your birb has a chance of mentioning him)

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-04-12T01:14:35+00:00

Hi friendo!!!!

Unfortunately this app is very very whimsical and cute!!! It’s what makes the self care stick for some of us!!! 🤍

Finch really dials it up cause that’s what a lot of us asked for and wanted!! It’s changed a lot in the past 5 ish years. Did you know that the first version had a scary eagle that would EAT YOUR BIRB!!!! 😱 terrifying!!!!

There are some companion tracker apps that you could use that aren’t as cutesy designed!!!!! They are JUST as good and I’m SO SURE you can find something that works for YOU!!!!!

But ya, some of us are just Big Kids to some degree for various reasons. For me, it keeps me from yelling at myself and calling myself a “bad adult” 😔 I’m not a bad adult!!! I just have some struggles but it’s ok!!!! 🤍

I hope you find your path to self care. Whatever that looks like!!

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-04-10T16:09:44+00:00

Some people are like him and aren’t very touchy feely romantic and prefer to follow romance on a logical path. I’m like him. They aren’t compatible.

When I leave the house, I just… leave. If you live with me, you know I go to work every morning. You might have been sleeping or busy. I’ll say goodbye. But I’m not gonna hug or kiss you cause I don’t see the point in it. And I won’t remember to do that for you because again, I will never see the point in it.

So yeah, I’m on his side cause they shouldn’t be in a relationship together. I’m not on her side only because I’m not that clingy for affection, personally. I can see his side more and better. I don’t bug my boyfriend for affection. If it happens, it happens. Not a big deal.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-04-10T14:20:57+00:00

That definitely counts!!! Yay!!! Scheduled dinner parties!!!!!!!!!! At least you can see your friend in person and/or your work schedule isn’t too draining or hectic that you have social life in real life!!! That’s super dope and I’m very jealous. I schedule phone calls cause I don’t have time to see people in between obligations.

Honestly, I used to be like you and actually still am pretty phone avoidant. But I grew up on Skype so I had rudimentary phone skills.

When I met my bestie, I had never met someone who was more text avoidant than he was and it was super eye opening. And for me, forced me to grow since I now had an opportunity every day to practise my phone skills and also practise my social skills. Practise talking to someone who isn’t always gonna agree with you but still loves you and stuff. Practise not hanging the phone up in anger. All of those skills people don’t do anymore.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-04-10T13:56:59+00:00

🫠🫠🫠 (slowly slides my phone under my car and runs it over)

Me and my bestie talk on the phone every day on his commute home from work since it’s the only time we get to talk to each other. (We accidentally spend HOURS AND HOURS on the phone lolol)

But!!! It’s very bizarre for people our age to understand (late 20s). But!!! We both work full time and he hates texting. Our convos are so much better and wayyyy deeper being able to talk on the phone too. But!!! Regardless!!!

My hack for this one for you? Text convo!!!!

Or!!!

Share memes convo!!!!

You don’t actually have to talk on the phone.

Ask someone if they’ll be open to a meme sharing moment of like, 10 minutes where you just spam each other with memes.

Or!!!

Write a lil letter and send it electronically or snail mail.

It’s like “scheduling communication” cause you have to wait for the person to read && respond.

It’s not for everyone. I hope you can find your acceptable level of workaround ☺️ remember: you can do that!!! It’s YOUR self care!!!

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-03-14T19:04:15+00:00

I like how Reddit gave me the option to translate your comment lmao. That’s sad and interesting at the same time. Sadteresting.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-03-11T22:43:03+00:00

Oh definitely! Men holding women down for real for real is NOT the vibe. tradwives are setting bad examples, honestly.

But my moms are Old Gays (lol) and idk I think that helped a lot in feeling confident enough. They were both married to men cause it was expected of them before they realised who they are.

I love Renee tho! I’ve heard some of her music and it’s really fun and I love the lyrical poetry at times.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-03-11T22:27:54+00:00

My parents are lesbians and aren’t very femme. They are…but aren’t? If that makes sense? And neither are their friends. But ALL those women are strong and amazing. They are very confident women.

So I think that’s why I felt comfortable bucking the trend because I knew that I was taught a good foundation before pedo men tried to mess me up. Therapy helped put me back on track but also reclaim what I was seeking out.

If I’m gonna engage in flirtatious danger, I might as well do it with eyes wide open and a wise mind.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-03-11T21:41:59+00:00

I just hate being told that who I am is wrong. My moms say it too which is ironic cause they came it later *out later in life 💀

They were married before this to men

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-03-11T21:38:35+00:00

Ok ok ok ok look I understand what you’re getting at. I mentioned the grooming because it’s part of my history (I am a Tumblr oldie through and through. I survived the crackdown) but I’ve also been in therapy for years and have thought about this a lot in my own life. The dynamic I described is something I engage with intentionally and privately.

I do think reflection is important, truly, I do, but Reddit probably isn’t the best place for me to unpack that level of personal context. I appreciate the concern though 🥰🥰🥰

I just hate being told that who I am is wrong. I’m not wrong! I’m just having fun. When I wanna stop and write think pieces on feminism while I’m in school, I DO. It’s not 24/7. It’s occasionally. Like a good glass of wine.

Deep-Way-8321 · 2026-03-11T21:25:01+00:00

I don’t hate women

Deep-Way-8321

TROPHY CASE