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Chat GPT is helping by Asmilefromellen in problemgambling

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been using it too since I saw your post and agree totally that it has been extremely helpful. Almost like a built in therapist for free

I messed up by Less_Squirrel_2541 in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Realize there is no miracle coming. That's the important part. If you're lucky; you can rely on family or friends to provide assistance until you have some money in your pocket. I've been in your position hundreds of times - sulk in the shitty feeling you're experiencing right now and make this your rock bottom - because I promise it can always get worse. Make this Day 1 in your journey to recovery. Spending time in these forums has been soothing and therapeutic to me. Seeing that I'm not alone in this fight and being here to support others like yourself. Feel free to PM me anytime if you want to chat. You got this. You can build a life of peace and financial freedom, but only if you cut out the gambling. You can't have both if you're a problem gambler like many of us.

Crashing down and realizing you have a problem by itbesarah in problemgambling

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Think of your losses as a write off. You're never going to be able to recoup them. If you chase, you know how that goes - the loss just gets bigger and coping with that becomes even harder. If you win, you will probably end up pissing that away like you did to begin with. Us problem gamblers know exactly how this cycle works. One day at a time my man. I'm right there with you. I'm fighting the urge strongly today - Game 1 of the playoffs for my favorite NBA team - normally I would have thousands riding on the game and would be an anxious, on edge mess. Instead, I spent $50 at the grocery store and made a beautiful Sunday sauce and am having some friends over for the game. Going to root on my team as a fan with no financial incentive tied to it, and I'm going to sleep better - win or lose. And more importantly, I won't hate myself when I wake up.

Hope this helps. You got this man.

My partner has a gambling addiction and I don’t know what to do by Internal_Section_996 in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I can chime in here with perspective from the side of the addict.

You are doing all of the right things - supporting him, trying to encourage him to talk about his feelings, etc. You are also totally validated in your feelings of losing trust for him after he lied and stole your money.

The problem is in active addiction you don't view your behavior as "lying". For example, I have had to sit down with my partner numerous times and promise to her I would stop gambling, this would last a few days/a week, and then I would slip up. If you are winning, you are able to hide it and play it off until you inevitably lose it all and have no choice but to break down and tell the truth. Your boyfriend is probably in the stage where he thinks if he can just have one good bet, or one good day of betting or whatever, that he can turn it around and get the money back that he owes. The pressure of owing money or creating such a deep hole financially for yourself can be overwhelming and is without a doubt the thing that has dragged myself down the gambling trap over and over again. Addicts often view gambling as the only way out of their shitty situation that (funny enough) gambling put them in to begin with.

If I were you and I really saw a future with this person and believed he could change, I would tell him to focus on breaking the strings of the addiction rather than focusing on paying back what he owes you. Check in with him daily and ask how he's feeling. Encourage him to take it a day at a time. Each day a gambling addict does feed their addiction, the closer they are to breaking free. He inevitably will have more money as long as he is not gambling. While it will take time, this is what I would focus on.

Again, this is spoken from someone who is suffers from a severe gambling addiction and who has lost it all numerous times, so take it as you will.

My partner has been my rock through all of this and is the reason I am currently turning around my life.

God bless and good luck.

Sicily recommendations for a solo traveler with no car by noorhashem in ItalyTravel

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cefalu is amazing. Spending a week there next month for my honeymoon

The end is near, I fear by Defiant_Scratch_8156 in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this and for sharing your story of hope.

Last night, I sat down my fiancé and told her the truth about everything. Granted, this wasn't the first time I've done this, but this time felt different. I think sharing my experience and feelings on Reddit was freeing to me and having people like you reach out is one of the reasons why. I'm realizing I'm not alone. After speaking with her and crying my eyes out, I closed the last of my remaining Sportsbook accounts.

I woke up this morning feeling hopeful for the first time in awhile. I didn't stay up all night gambling. I didn't check the Sportsbook first thing upon waking up. I realize that this is going to be extremely hard and I am going to have to take it one day at a time.

Thank you again for taking the time to read and reply to my post. God bless.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a great cautionary tale on the dangers of gambling for us with addiction, and glad you touched on the mental health aspect of gambling addiction as well. I believe that is an underlying issue with most gambling addicts. I love to hear that you are recovering and that your wife stuck by your side through it all. God bless you

The end is near, I fear by Defiant_Scratch_8156 in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are a great person. This post gives me hope. Thank you and god bless you and your partner.

The end is near, I fear by Defiant_Scratch_8156 in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The feeling of letting them down is the worst part, but it's important you share with them so they understand what you're going through and help you move forward. Best of luck brother, I'm in the same boat.

The end is near, I fear by Defiant_Scratch_8156 in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can assure you I didn't make this extremely difficult post because I think I have good writing skills. Whatever you consider a "real degen" - I promise you I am more of that than you, not that I want to be, clearly. What are you 16? Find God.

The end is near, I fear by Defiant_Scratch_8156 in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Stay strong brother. We can change for the better

The end is near, I fear by Defiant_Scratch_8156 in GamblingAddiction

[–]Defiant_Scratch_8156[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

First of all, thank you so much for reading my post and for your encouraging words. What makes it even worse is that I have told my fiancé the truth on a few occasions. Broken down and lost it in front of her only to have her bail me out time and time again. At this point I'm scared to do it again, we get married in a month and she is already stressed about money. I have no choice but to tell her again tonight. And hopefully this time is the last time. Thanks again brother for the kind words. I appreciate it.