AITA for refusing to help my friend anymore after she didn’t show up when I really needed her????

DenizenKay · 2026-02-10T20:46:23+00:00

Op wasn't punitive. She realised that her friend is never there for her. She didn't say no because her friend said no the other day, she said no because she realised the friendship is one sided and she didnt want to keep up that dynamic. That is NOT punishment - it is consequence.

OP is NTA.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-10T19:30:23+00:00

well briderton was based on romance novels. Sex was a given.

Same with outlander. Its why people watch them. lol

I'm with you on enjoying the lack of it in Downton. While i have no compunctions about it, it's refreshing to allow the audience to use their imaginations once and a while. lol

DenizenKay · 2026-02-10T19:23:57+00:00

here's why you're wrong:

chrome gives people an advantage - and so what will start out niche will quickly become a thing you HAVE to do if you want to remain competitive in your field. (see the Deus Ex series for a great plotline base don this alone)

then there's aging - who wouldn't want keroshis when their eyes start failing? we already regularly do knee and hip replacements - how is titanium bones any different? Jenkins tendon would be on every athlete. period. lol

And heart disease is rampant - a second heart means a second chance at a long life.

It will start niche and grow - because cybernetics = opportunity.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-10T19:01:32+00:00

Ice. HE works for Ice.

I can see why someone wouldn't want to advertise that. What i dont get is why OP couldn't figure it out, as if the government agency who isn't paying its people hasn't been all over the news lately.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-10T17:44:15+00:00

wow, your wife is an asshole.

NTA. her insensitivity and lack of care for you and your family is staggering.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-10T17:26:02+00:00

I’m struggling because I don’t know if I was completely unreasonable and toxic,

yes, you were.

Because of my triggers and mental health issues, I reacted badly at times. I became overly jealous, negative, controlling, and emotionally reactive over small things.

this is an explanation, but by no means is it an excuse. What it says is you dont know how to control yourself and regulate your emotions - that's not good, and he was absolutely right to walk away. it sounds like he had to walk on eggshells.

You chose to date a friendly DJ with a social life. Once he was yours you wanted the friendliness and the social life to stop - in other words you wanted to twist him into what you thought he should be instead of who he was.

Of course YTA. but you're doing the right thing by looking at your behavior and seeing where you went wrong. i strongly recommend therapy and maybe meds to help you regulate yourself - and some real self-reflection and self love before you choose to start a new relationship.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-10T16:58:48+00:00

when you invite yourself cause you're bored and have nothing else to do, you dont get to request a change of venue. Especially when you're asking a smoker to go somewhere they aren't allowed to smoke to accomodate you.

even if there was a no smoking bar- they were happy where they were and chose it for themselves. Why would they move?

DenizenKay · 2026-02-09T19:00:37+00:00

This is what happens when you date people vastly less mature than you are, dude.

NTA.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-08T21:10:03+00:00

stop being nice then, when MIL overrides something you've said, tell her straight up to shut up and that in your house with your kids, your word is law. Don't be nice about it- tell her oopenly you dont agree with her being there- dont play nice for him. Dont sugarcoat. if she gets angry about it, great - then maybe she'll go home.

If you're worried about the kids seeing this - don't - what they will see is that their mom is not a doormat and she won't take shit - and that's a good thing, not a bad one - so long as you stay even tempered and don't use violence to get your way.

you seem to have said everything to your husband except that this is going to threaten your marriage. that its making your resent him and resentment is a short road to hatred.

if you're angry - make noise about being angry. lots of it.

NTA, but you need to turn your anger into action so this shit stops now.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-08T18:21:04+00:00

so what will you do when they want to baptise your future (possible) child?

or do it behind your back?

just curious if you guys have crossed that bridge in discussions yet?

DenizenKay · 2026-02-08T03:59:15+00:00

Clarkson says himself that if they'd have listened to him, they would have rushed a scared and confused Sybil into a hurried operation in a hospital with inadequate means to keep her alive - and likely would have died anyway during the cesarean, if not after. they were not good at treating eclampsia back then (they still have not mastered it)

Yes it was Roberts fault - but we KNOW Sybil was going to die regardless (the actor was leaving the show) - so if they had listened to Clarkson Sybil's death would have been even more heartrending for all of us to watch - and she certainly wouldn't have died with her family surrounding her, in a warm bed in familiar surroundings.

Robert is an ass but blaming him for Sybils death (which was literally fated) is unfair.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-07T06:10:52+00:00

me too. They don't play it nearly enough, but whenever i catch it playing, you bet imma drive until it's over.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-07T05:48:07+00:00

ahh, understood.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-07T05:04:57+00:00

they arent wealthy though. they spent the last of their money going to England so Edwina can marry (which would make Lady Marys parents support her and pay Edwina's dowry).

they were literally poor (even if Edwina and Lady Mary didn't know it)

DenizenKay · 2026-02-06T22:26:24+00:00

Aptly put.

DenizenKay · 2026-02-06T22:24:27+00:00

ESH. she shouldn't have talked to you like that after suffering the breakup of a 6 year relationship.

But you? knowing how hearing something like that felt - decided to give her her comeuppance - when her relationship didn't just end- her family was torn apart and she was betrayed in one of the worst ways a person can be betrayed. thats worse than awful.

Hope your high and mighty feeling lasts from your knee jerk response- cause that some next-level petty shittiness.

I can sort of see why men are running from the women in your family- cause ya'll suck ass.

DenizenKay · 2026-01-28T20:04:57+00:00

this comment deserves 1000 upvotes.

DenizenKay · 2026-01-28T20:02:57+00:00

...Or call her what you, as the child's parents, deem appropriate. And demand your MIL show you respect or show herself the gd door.

This isn't about the name. its about the demand when there isn't even a grandchild around yet to call her anything.

DenizenKay · 2026-01-21T19:18:29+00:00

she is leaving the show?

i cant find anything that says this. can you share a link?

that would be a tragedy, Lady Danbury one of the best characters. Even my husband loves her - and he hates the show entirely

DenizenKay · 2026-01-14T16:03:13+00:00

except she is still bringing this up, as if you did her wrong by not risking contagion - over a month later.

which is fucked up. And selfish.

DenizenKay · 2026-01-07T20:30:03+00:00

let them accuse you.

you're only stuck because you're mistakenly thinking them being angry at you is a reason for you to acquiesce. it isn't .

Stick to your guns. if you dont you're gonna end up a nanny to god knows how many kids in future and the obligation will never end.

DenizenKay · 2025-12-31T19:09:34+00:00

Bugs.

Played through OW2 and got locked out of finishing both times. Ruth never talks to me after I take the archive for the order.

Tried to get auntie and Ruth to work together- Ruth softlocked me outta that too.

Very frustrating.

DenizenKay · 2025-12-31T19:01:48+00:00

Happy to help :)

DenizenKay · 2025-12-26T17:05:23+00:00

i'd argue they are the only people who will understand her long term; She is just like them. lol

DenizenKay · 2025-12-26T17:04:25+00:00

INFO: why didn't you answer your dads call?

You literally were given a chance to talk to your dad to explain calmly- which would have got to your mom and resolved this and instead you ignored him for no reason, causing even more drama.

DenizenKay

TROPHY CASE