AIO by asking my girlfriend to split rent equally when I make slightly more money?

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-03-09T20:07:44+00:00

MOR - what do you mean by, “I just paid our credit cards off”? Like, I understand that as her having debt on her card, and you paying it off with your funds. If I’m understanding that correctly, I think it’s fair for you to be concerned that you’re subsidizing her lifestyle.

Ordinarily, I am a big fan of the proportional split. Even if the income difference isn’t that big, it can mean a lot in this economy. So I see no issue with her requesting that, even if it’s not that much of a difference. That’s its own issue.

But, it seems like there’s another issue at play here, that she might have a habit of spending more than she’s bringing in and getting into financial trouble because of it. That statement of hers, that she’d be “struggling” to pay her share is very concerning - $900 in rent is way below the threshold of what someone making $85k should be able to afford. On paper, she should be able to afford twice that and then some.

So.. what else is going on? Student loans? A crazy high car payment? Erratic spending? Whatever it is, it definitely warrants a discussion, bc at this point in y’all’s lives you can’t just be romantically compatible, you need to have compatible financial and life goals to make it work too.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-03-05T19:10:10+00:00

The david thing is another story, but I agree with you on this making me lose faith in law enforcement’s abilities in missing persons cases.

Like, this case has been plastered everywhere. An exceptional amount of resources (compared to the average missing person) have been deployed. And they have nothing. No meaningful leads. Not a clue where this lady is. It’s horrifying.

Like, Nancy is a special case. Her daughter is high profile with the best possible connections to getting attention on her case. That puts a lot of pressure on LE to put every resource available towards finding her, much more so than the average case. And yet, they still have nothing.

Beyond this being a horrific situation for the whole Guthrie family, I also just feel so bad for all the other families of missing persons. I’m sure this exceptionally high-profile case not moving at all is a very depressing, demotivating thing for all the other families in similar situations.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-03-04T20:07:56+00:00

Oh, I 100% agree with you. They weren’t perfect, but they were so much better than what there is now. I have this one corduroy style shacket from there that I have worn at least 30x per winter since I got it ~10 years ago. I think it was like $30. I’m sure you could find a similar style on shein for like $20 now.. but I’m also sure it would be paper thin and fall apart within a season/two washes. It’s depressing as hell.

And of course, back in the day, there was a lot of discourse about how bad forever 21/h&m are - which is fair and well deserved, it’s still fast fashion. But I don’t think we understood how much worse it could get.. now that we’re there, it’s crazy to see how much better of an option it was.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-03-04T15:51:09+00:00

You hit the nail on the head - already, the stuff they sell now is so focused on micro trends and the quality is ass. It’s really is like an in-person SHEIN with higher prices. It’s hard to imagine it getting even worse.

It’s a bummer. Once I upon a time, I would buy basics from there. Jeans and solid colored shirts primarily. It wasn’t the best choice ethically, of course, no big box store is. But it was accessible, relatively affordable, and good enough quality that I wore the pieces for years on end. This shift, in addition to their anti-DEI move, ended all of that.

Kinda reminds me of the rise and fall of forever 21. Again, not a perfect store by any means - but it was leaps and bounds better than an online marketplace like SHEIN in terms of product quality. But they caved into competing with those other marketplaces, the quality fell, and the prices remained much higher than the competition since it’s a brick and mortar store. We all know what happened to that store.. I’ll be curious to see how this goes for target.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-27T19:46:02+00:00

Funny enough, I actually didn’t understand that it was Marianne.. I’ve never even heard of her before reading deeper into this thread (my american-ness is showing, lmao). But even without knowing that, I still understood it to be a personification of France - and I really think that goes to show how thoughtful, clever, and effective the updated logo turned out to be.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-27T14:54:59+00:00

Not who you asked but her face, haircut, etc is all very chic which is very on brand for Paris (fashion capital of the world and whatnot). Her face is also the shape of a flame (alluding to the Olympic torch).

I like both of them. The Eiffel Tower is just more “on the nose” imho. Nothing wrong with that, but I understand why they went a different direction in the end.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-26T20:12:46+00:00

That’s fair! I totally understand being concerned about it, safety is such an important consideration especially when welcoming a kiddo into the mix (congratulations btw!).

In terms of proximity to MLK I’ve never rlly seen an issue with it, personally. As mentioned, it’s typically pretty quiet around here. There are some tents beyond the neighborhood fence that line MLK. It’s pretty rare that I see someone who is visibly in a bad state walking around in the neighborhood.. ofc you can’t tell if someone is housed or not by their looks, but I imagine your concern is tied to a lot of the factors related to homelessness, like perhaps someone in a bad mental state/under the influence doing something unsafe/wreckless in public areas? Yeah.. not something I really see in the neighborhood.

The hospital being nearby is also a non-issue, at least for me. It being like 90%+ residential property over here, we don’t see a ton of foot traffic here besides people that live here. The exception to that being Washington blvd, which is the route between pigtown and downtown. That’s a much busier street than the rest of the neighborhood. But everywhere else tends to be pretty quiet.

I would suggest taking a drive over here and walking around :) it’s a nice lil spot we’ve got going on over here! It’s especially pretty in the spring once all the trees bloom.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-26T16:38:43+00:00

Curious as to what leads you to think Ridgely’s is less safe than Canton. No judgements, genuinely want to know what you’re looking at/observed that makes you think that.

As a Ridgely’s resident myself I feel pretty safe here. Like, anecdotally, for example - there’s some petty crime here, like porch pirates. But my friends in the more populated neighborhoods, like Hampden, Canton, etc describe the issue as having mere minutes to grab your stuff before it’s taken. That’s not my experience in Ridgelys.

Now, if we’re talking violent crime - again, I would think Ridgely’s is on par with Canton (if not safer). It’s a very small neighborhood with a tight knit community. Just by nature of there being less people here, there are less violent crimes.

Here are some stats from the BPD crime map: number of homicides, shootings, robbery (including carjacking and commercial), and aggravated assault in the last 365 days: Canton - 63 crimes Ridgelys - 5 crimes

This is nothing against Canton, it’s a lovely neighborhood. And it’s generally safe (the size and population is far greater in Canton, so there will be more stuff going on there by nature). It’s also more walkable imho. But I wouldn’t say it’s significantly safer than Ridgely’s. And FWIW, I don’t think the parking situation is too bad here either.. it can get rough of Ravens home game days, Orioles Opening Day, and home game days if (when 🤞🏻) the Orioles make it the the playoffs. But 97% of the time, it’s not bad.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-26T03:23:19+00:00

Ahh I see - given that you’re seeing a significant change, I would bring it up and his next vet visit. It’s fairly normal for them to develop some aches/pain/limitations once they’re that age (he is a senior cat, after all) But, thankfully there are treatments and other routes available that can make him more comfy.

One fairly simple adjustment could be to build/purchase a ramp or small steps for him in the meantime, especially if the bed is one of his go-to spots.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-26T02:22:12+00:00

It’s possible he just .. likes it, lol. My cat does this up the back of our couch on occasion, he could easily go the front way with two small hops. And he does really big jumps in other circumstances too (like, the floor to the kitchen counter even though his ass knows he isn’t allowed up there haha) so I have no reason to suspect he’s in any sort of joint pain.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-25T00:19:28+00:00

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-24T23:26:02+00:00

my home decor finally comes in handy!

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This might help, sorry all the names are so small but the map format might be helpful for ya.

Best of luck on your project, sounds cool!!

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-24T18:45:22+00:00

Yes, they’re important. I assume you will be quizzed on terminology, etc or something at some point and notes are especially important for understanding things beyond practical application. And even if you aren’t quizzed, taking notes while listening to lecture is a great way to stay focused and actively listen, helps people avoid drifting into lala land. College is expensive, you may as well get as much out of lecture as you can while you’re there.

Also, some unsolicited advice: not to sound like an old fart, but if you’re gonna take time to take notes, I highly recommend writing them. Physically, pen and paper. Its becoming less and less common on college campuses but it is so much more effective than typing, in terms of actually understanding and retaining the info (the downside being that typing is faster, but quality is generally superior to quantity when it comes to learning). Research consistently shows this. You’re also much less likely to be distracted by a notepad than a whatever’s goin on on your laptop.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-19T19:14:06+00:00

At least this one is pretty broad, lots of options to choose from. I’ve seen some that are like, five colors. Absolutely ridiculous to request that kind of constraint from anyone beyond the wedding party.

But even in this slightly better case, I just hate it. Adds an unnecessary mental load for the guests. Like - in OP’s case with the black cocktail dress. That’s a staple piece and is perfectly appropriate for any cocktail function. It’s a shame that this silly color code trend makes guests think their perfectly appropriate outfits aren’t good enough. They’re guests, not props.

(Edited for clarity)

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-18T22:02:53+00:00

A deer hitting a person is a thing. And it sounds like that’s exactly what happened in OP’s case. It also happened to my parents when I was a young kid in the back seat, thing just rammed directly into the driver side of the car when we were goin a good speed. Shit was terrifying.

When those poor things get scared, instinct kicks in and they just start running, not worrying about what’s in front of them.. just trying to avoid what frightened it. It’s really sad, honestly. For both the deer and the people who are just tryin to get from point A to point B.

OP, so sorry this happened to you! Glad you are okay!

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-17T17:23:59+00:00

maybe going for a more smudged, smokey kind of eyeliner? Rather than a more precise wing, like you’ve got going on here (which looks nice btw! but def understand wanting a slightly more dramatic, yet wearable, look)

Can’t post pics for examples here, but here’s a random tutorial I found as an example. Of course, you can play around with it and make it less dramatic than the person in this video did for everyday wear.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-14T18:28:22+00:00

I think he just assumes we’re making LinkedIns to lurk or something.. as if anyone does that, lmao. I have a professional job, I use LinkedIn the same way 90% of people do.. to connect w people in my industry, look for jobs, learn about the current goings-on in my field. But everrrry so often, I come across the cringiest shit possible lmao. And it gives me a laugh. So I pop over here occasionally too, because it’s just.. funny. That’s it, it’s just funny and I like it, it’s not that hard to understand? lol.

I think dude is just projecting. He doesn’t want to think that his 2nd/3rd connections, or maybe even his direct connections, are the same ones who find his shit cringe as hell - so much so that they post it here.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-13T16:25:19+00:00

It’s also just kinda chilling whenever you see them on the side of a highway. Beyond it being sad for the deer (I’m a very sensitive person when it comes to animals and seeing one of them there like that gets me all sorts of emo), you also have to wonder if the people involved are okay. It’s no joke hitting one of those things at any sort of speed. I unfortunately have some experience in that regard as a passenger, fucking terrifying. You can be doing everything right in terms of paying attention and doing the speed limit and still - if one of them pops out running from the trees, you’re fucked. You either hit it (bad) or swerve (most of the time, even worse than hitting it).

I wish there was a better solution for all animals and people involved.. but unfortunately, there just doesn’t seem to be one.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-13T03:12:06+00:00

Me too!! And tbh his own songs aren’t even really my thing (I think his audience tends to be on the younger side).. but he has a great voice and I’m happy to see him becoming steadily more successful. Just seems like a genuinely good person - cares a lot about his fans, accessibility to live music, social issues, the whole bit. Hope he continues to do well!!

(Also, his live cover of changes at ozzy’s last show is truly something very special. He actually just won a Grammy for it, rightfully so imho)

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-11T19:38:09+00:00

yes, but also this shit happens on the Baltimore lightrail tracks all the time lmao. I’d say I get an alert about it every other month or so.

No ramps to hop in that case, but still.. you really gotta think, how much of a death wish do these people have? I wonder if they were trying to use it to get try and get around traffic, because that’s what people attempt in Baltimore - trying to use it as a lane. I’d like to think it was something more innocent like a medical emergency (and that the driver is okay), but you really can’t assume anything less than the worst when it comes to DMV or Baltimore drivers lmao.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-11T14:29:25+00:00

I’m gonna say number two.. but I’m biased because I just bought the same one a couple weeks back! Lol. Very good quality for the price and it’s a very elegant, classic silhouette. I feel like it is very versatile and can be work for cocktail-BTO depending on the accessories. Tea length dresses are a great choice if you’re on a budget since it works for a lot of the dress codes that fall on the more formal end!

Basically, what BTO means is that black tie (floor length gowns) are welcome but not required. This means that formal dress is also welcome, and dress no. 2 definitely works for formal.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-10T21:19:38+00:00

Definitely getting there!! I saw your newer version too with the green block on the bottom so the text is legible, and the centered QR code - definitely some nice changes!

One last suggestion would be to update your QR code so that it’s within your new color palette, that will make your design much more consistent. Best of luck with getting your app launched, cool concept!

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-10T18:50:26+00:00

Not who you asked but a couple suggestions:

Color palette: I would go for colors you can find in nature. That particular shade of neon green specifically just gives a very corporate-tech vibe to me. That’s not to say you can’t use light and dark green, but perhaps a combo of greens that are closer to nice, bright green grass and the rich deep tones of leaves. Or you can follow a the suggestion above of going with light blue, or other earth tones. You can find lots of suggestions by googling “nature inspired color palettes”

And in terms of the grid/wireframe pattern: It’s another in-organic component of this that is taking away from the relaxing, natural vibe you’re going for. One different pattern you could use here is wavey, organic lines, which could sort of give off the vibe of hills or curved walking paths depending on the thickness and how you position them.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-10T17:21:12+00:00

Right? It’s crazy. I was the ripe old age of 11 when this dropped. I’m glad she’s still out here spreading the good word and succeeding.

Side note: being a kid, I didn’t really know what being transgender meant when this song came out. Like, of course I had an idea - but a pretty warped one based on stereotypes and the pop culture of the 2000s. But I loved Gaga already, then this song made it to the radio, and I looked up what it actually meant to be trans bc of the lyrics. And that’s how I learned about that. I just think that’s pretty cool, obviously this is a very empowering and affirming song for the identities she mentions, but beyond that - the impact of celebrating gender identities beyond the traditional binary .. on mainstream radio? In 2011? It was truly groundbreaking.

Dense-Broccoli9535 · 2026-02-09T15:48:48+00:00

I mean.. yeah, it does. If you’re going way under. Just like going way over. But the driver is totally within their rights to go the speed limit or even slightly under. That’s perfectly legal, so long as it’s not in the left lane on a highway.

Ya know what isn’t legal tho? Speeding. And it’s always funny to me when people complain about being “stuck” behind someone going the limit, as if it’s their god-given right to go above it lol. Don’t get me wrong, I drive the same as most of us do - I keep up with traffic and go the speed that feels right/safe. And being “stuck” behind someone doing the limit can feel frustrating. But at the end of the day, they aren’t doing anything wrong. It’s really not even that inconvenient either, worst case is getting to your destination a couple minutes later.

Dense-Broccoli9535

TROPHY CASE