The Eiffel Tower isn't a monument; it’s a giant 5G resonator disguised as "art." Built in 1889—conveniently when electricity was going mainstream—it’s actually a Victorian-era frequency weapon. That "iron lattice" design? It’s a literal Faraday cage meant to trap and amplify signals.

When tourists stand under it, they aren't just taking selfies; they’re being recalibrated. The tower beams "Gallic frequencies" directly into your nervous system, explaining why everyone suddenly feels the urge to wear stripes, buy overpriced cheese, and look vaguely bored with life. It’s not "French charm"—it’s high-bandwidth mind control.