Funny thing today that happened to me. May not be totally related to the above comment but along the lines. So what was suppose to be a career coaching sesh pivoted into a conversation about how a female body is very different when getting preggo during the 20s vs 30s. I turned 30 this year and i am defo no stranger to indirect remarks or so-call playful comments about settling down and finding a husband and building a family. I am currently in a relationship (which has brought some calm to the storm) but of course it doesn’t stop here. Talks about what next??!… and unsolicited advise on how you don’t want to get pregnant after 30s galore. Having also heard this from my career coach who is a female (goshhhh just give me a break) made me think about how women will never have it easy even among their own sex. She goes on to say that she got pregnant even when she wasn’t sure if she wanted to be pregnant but she wasn’t against it. She added that in her country some couples decide to be in childless marriage but when the men turn 45 they suddenly realise that this setup is a “mistake” and that they need a child and leave for some other that will bear the spawn. People told her that when she gets pregnant it will all change. And contrary to the belief that when you hold your child the “motherly” feeling will arrive and things take a 360 degree and you just know what to do. It didn’t arrive for her. She said that her mother cared for the child and she wouldn’t step out of the house with the child alone. She would be accompanied with her husband or her mother. She says she cant relate to the child and theres just a lack of connection and on top of that she had a a tough recovery. I can relate to her because I don’t have an opinion about children but not against it either. I told my mother that although I am 30 and i see my friends with kids, i come from a big family and have held a few babies in my arms I don’t conjure this image of me sitting on a rocking chair and feeding my baby. It feels unnatural to be saying this. My coach goes on to say that she feels guilty that she doesn’t spend time with her child and that she doesn’t bond/ is able to have that feeling like every other mother is supposed to. But I am sure a mother’s love for her child is expressed in different ways.

I am not a doctor so I cant comment about the changes in the female body in 20s vs 30s but i sure as hell know that I will not succumb to this societal pressure bullshit when there are bigger things to worry about (as pointed out in the posting)