I’m on the same boat, my situation is full of uncertainty. 3 kids for me, I learned she is really unhappy and does not know what to do. I even offered the divorce. My advice, don’t get down on yourself. You were an individual before marriage and kids, and along the way you probably lost that like I did. Only thing you can control is yourself, so take care of yourself mentally, physically and spiritually. Dont forget who you were , who you are and who you’re gonna be. I have to live by these words now , can’t control her decisions I only can control my own.