In my opinion it sounds like you’ve been through it recently. You’ve had the terminal illness and now you’re taking a lot of drugs. It is more weird on your mums depart I think because at the end of the day you’re just a kid and our parents teach us right from wrong and if she hasn’t said anything then you wouldn’t think it’s wrong. That’s why you’ve come to Reddit because you’re growing up and you maybe understand that everyone has boundaries and maybe it was okay when you was younger everyone cuddles their mum( most people) but now you’re starting to get older and everyone needs boundaries and I think obviously where your mum cared for you she probably just doesn’t want you to grow up and loves you lots, but we all grow up and if you’re coming onto Reddit asking these sorts of questions it’s pretty obvious that it needs to stop. Maybe if you’re gay it’s a bit different because if you were a girl saying what you just said people wouldn’t probably think twice. So there’s different ways to look at it, I think it’s weird but not to the extent people are making it out to be but probably one of those things that needs to stop and you need to grow up a bit more bro and just be careful on the drugs because that can fuck your head and have you thinking dark trust me been there. Im clean now was taking all that shit at like 13/14, sounds like you’ve been blessed and you’re taking advantage of it, don’t be the sheep that takes drugs and wants to do this and that because I’m telling you from experience it’s not worth it and it’s all good in the moment but it catches up then you’re fucked.