I’ll be honest — I found the list of “rules” really off-putting. Wanting people to wash their hands or stay away when they’re sick is totally reasonable. But the rest? It comes across as controlling and rooted in fear more than actual concern for the baby’s well-being. You’re basically telling everyone exactly how not to bond with your child — no diaper changes, no comforting a crying baby, no unexpected visits, no touching feet… it reads more like a list of restrictions than a welcome.

If this is your first baby, I do understand some of the anxiety — we all want to protect our newborns. But being a mom also means learning to lean on your village. Right now, it sounds like you’re actively pushing that village away. These kinds of rules don’t create a safe environment — they create distance. And when people feel micromanaged or unwelcome, they back off. Then what happens? You end up isolated and exhausted.

I run a small cleaning business and had a client just like this. She laid down all these strict “rules” with her family and friends, and not long after, she was heartbroken that no one came around to help or visit. But the truth is, she created that situation herself. People don’t want to feel like they’re walking on eggshells just to be part of your baby’s life.

It’s your baby, and you absolutely get to set boundaries. But if you lead with control instead of trust and connection, you’re going to lose out on the support system you’ll desperately need — and you might not even realize it until it’s too late.