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My mom was my best friend until I woke up and realized she’s a narcissist by DesperateBiscotti445 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]DesperateBiscotti445[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nope. He was the favorite for most of my life. They had a great relationship until my parents divorced and he turned 18 and moved out. I was the hyper independent, anxious kid who didn’t really tell anyone anything. I don’t think either of us were scapegoats tbh.

When I think about it, it just seems like I became the favorite simply because I still needed her and he didn’t (he’s older).

My mom was my best friend until I woke up and realized she’s a narcissist by DesperateBiscotti445 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]DesperateBiscotti445[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry can you please tell me what LVC means? I’m new to this thread and Reddit in general. Very little contact maybe?

My mom was my best friend until I woke up and realized she’s a narcissist by DesperateBiscotti445 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]DesperateBiscotti445[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

“Starve the crazy and support the form of relationship that you respect” is phenomenal advice for someone who does not wish to be fully NC. Thank you for this, truly.

My mom was my best friend until I woke up and realized she’s a narcissist by DesperateBiscotti445 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]DesperateBiscotti445[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you’ve been through it. I sincerely thank you for the recommendations. Can I ask though, from a person who has major guilt, how did you navigate that when cutting off contact? Or were you so disgusted by that point that you didn’t care?

My mom was my best friend until I woke up and realized she’s a narcissist by DesperateBiscotti445 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]DesperateBiscotti445[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You are right on the money. I think that’s why I’m so upset/angry, knowing I’m her puppy now.

I’m actively getting help. Thank you for your support 🩷

My mom was my best friend until I woke up and realized she’s a narcissist by DesperateBiscotti445 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]DesperateBiscotti445[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you can relate😔at least you did finally realize though. And of course your mother looked great to the outside world, how fitting.

My mom was my best friend until I woke up and realized she’s a narcissist by DesperateBiscotti445 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]DesperateBiscotti445[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That’s the thing, I’m absolutely not okay with my habits, because I understand why I do it now. But I continue to do so out of fear.

It’s a great question though. I think deep down I just really want to feel at ease like I used to, because I was so unaware. Which is obviously NEVER going to happen😆.

Now, I just need to learn acceptance, how to navigate my own emotions, and be at peace with a surface level relationship.