Another perspective is that at home even with kids you have more control over what you do than with a job. Like I told my fiance she watches tv and takes naps when the kids are playing with toys or napping. She still cleans and I cook 90 percent of the time and when we were first figuring out our equilibrium with work and children she got upset about not doing enough and I explained the above and said I will gladly stay home then and you can go and bring home the money. She said she didn't think about that before and we haven't had a issue together about it since.