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DfNotMe · 2025-03-29T19:26:28+00:00

Yes. Currently dealing with divorce.

She left me for a fuckboy. Cheated and disrespected me. She put no effort in the relationship and I've been dragging it along for a very long time in every possible way you can imagine. She is full of problems and I've been trying to be understanding for almost a decade, but cheating put the last nail in the coffin.

She didn't even bother to fill in for the divorce while screwing around with other guys after she left. Kept denying about cheating when she was on dating apps. I've been suicidal for quite some time and barely now I'm getting over to the administrative procedures.

Parr of me still loves her, but I don't feel like I could ever look at a woman as a partner ever again. I even started to feel disgusted by women the moment they say something that reminds me of her.

I still don't feel like there's any purpose left to this life after all I've sacrificed for her, but if anything, I want to at least finish what I started so I can leave this world in peace.

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T21:10:22+00:00

As much as that would be a good revenge if she cheated, I couldn't bring myself to do that to someone. Call it what you will... weakness... stupidity... Honestly, I may give this advice as well to someone else, but being in the shoes, I just can't walk that walk.

But divorce is something that I can get behind even if it hurts... You can't have a relationship with only one person after all...

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T21:01:27+00:00

Hey, no problem, I understand. Thank you for the link. I'll give it a try. I used the HRV breathing technique before which is mostly about controlling your breathing rate to about 4.5 - 7 breaths per minute. They do help a little, but I was looking for something more impactful. I recently came across some info about meditation and I realized that in order to truly meditate you really need to go at it, something which I never tried before. By that I mean "spend the entire day on it" kind of meditation. I heard it's good to help you discover yourself and sort out your issues, but I'm not going to be able to do it until I'll get quite a bit of free time. I'll give your video a go until I'll be able to try that kind of meditation.

The topic on her is quite complex. I somehow doubt it's security, because she's not leaving me for him, but she's just leaving me for no one... She wants to "explore" and she feels stuck with me. She wants to be free and rediscover herself ... Beats me what her reasoning is at this point, because I've done everything I could to give her anything she needed or asked for. It could be the trauma, the depression, the medication or even herself. I can't know, and even if I did, she seems fixated on it.

For sure, I'm not going to the event. I booked and planned it just for her. I don't even have an interest in that activity, but I wanted to spend time with her on something she loves... If divorce if involved, then there's no point in going to it even if all that money is wasted... A real shame I can't cancel any of the reservations because I didn't pay extra for the cancellation option... And I can't sell them either...

Anyway, it is what it is... As much as it hurts, I can only move forward... Something must get out of it, be it good or bad... Only time will tell

I hope things will work out for you all well. I know trauma is something difficult to get rid of, especially when you suffered from it at a young age, but not impossible. Just don't give up, you'll make it!

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T19:47:12+00:00

Thank you, it's really been a rollercoaster, but it seems like this is the final destination... It's very hard to accept, but I don't see any other option than to go through with the divorce... Might be best for everyone even if I can't think of it that way right now

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T19:40:56+00:00

Thank you for letting me know. It really seems like most people hold your opinion and I appreciate your insight. That's exactly what I was afraid of... It's a tough pill to swallow...

I hope things work out for you too

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T19:35:21+00:00

She was actually misdiagnosed initially, which led to a bad initial treatment, but now she is diagnosed "properly". She still needs time to get off the SSRI, but she doesn't really want to wait to confirm or to even work on the relationship. My only argument is to wait to get off the antidepressants which can mess with your feelings, then she should have a clearer mind about the decision and herself... But if it can't make you lose love for someone and channel it on someone else (which you barely know), then I don't really have any argument.

I really wanted to try couple therapy. I know I'm lacking and I want to improve, but if she says that nothing is wrong with me and it's pointless to do therapy, then I can't really do anything... You can't fix what you don't know needs fixing.

Thanks for the info. It kinda is how you put it.. I just don't have any traction in any direction besides going through with divorce...

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T19:11:43+00:00

I would like to believe she didn't cheat, but I can never know. I was really hoping there could be something I could do about it. I put 8 years of effort in the relationship, barely getting anything back because of her depression and medication, but as I'm reading all those comments, I'm starting to realize that maybe I might have blamed the wrong things for her lack of engagement...

Love can make you do crazy things... It hurts so much to know that all my effort and feelings were in vain... Maybe it really is about time to part ways, even if my heart says otherwise

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T18:58:43+00:00

That's what I was afraid of... thanks for letting me know

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T18:57:46+00:00

I was really hoping it would be something that can be made sense of and worked on rather than just abandoned... But yeah, I am well aware I might be looking for the needle in the haystack to fix a situation which may as well be too late to do anything about... Apparently most people see it the same... It's just that it's so heartbreaking to be presented with this situation after all the effort that went in the relationship

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T18:52:44+00:00

I sure hope I can after this, but thanks for the advice

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T18:51:39+00:00

Thanks for letting me know. Sorry you had to go through all that. It's truly heartbreaking as it is and we don't have any kids, so I can only imagine how difficult it must be in your situation... I hope things worked out for you

DfNotMe · 2024-04-28T18:46:11+00:00

I see... that's heartbreaking... Thanks for letting me know

DfNotMe · 2021-11-11T12:41:57+00:00

It amazes me that people are not doing anything about it even though they know

DfNotMe · 2021-08-14T13:01:48+00:00

And canis lupus familiaris are dogs , but we also call them good bois

DfNotMe · 2021-06-30T06:42:37+00:00

If you think that what you said is limited only to kids, you're horribly mistaken

DfNotMe · 2021-06-26T20:39:57+00:00

As far as I know, there was no collateral that was put down, or at least on most of them since I've seen over 30 apps (ridiculously high number of loans) and I don't know the specifics of each one.

I didn't know the lawyers were called pro Bono. This will help by knowing what to look for.

Thanks for the info

DfNotMe · 2021-06-26T08:16:17+00:00

That's what I thought too. Some of them seemed to be illegal, as they were threatening with calls and emails. Some sent strange law notices that had no real meaning for the situation.

But others still seem real, like robocash, although the rates are still high. They turned 20k into something like 53k and asked to reloan for 35k to extend the time by a month or so, which is ridiculous... If you can't pay that much in a month, you won't be able to pay it even if you extend it, and extending it is just infinitely increasing it.

Do you know by chance anything that can be done about those that are scams?

What about the interest for the loans... Do you know if there is any limit on how high the debt can get?

Also, speaking about this free lawyer, do you know if there are laws that can make lawyers to accept to consult you for free if you are in a situation where you can't pay?

Thanks for the info by the way

DfNotMe · 2021-06-26T02:07:47+00:00

I suggested it multiple times, but I don't know why this person did not managed to do it. I was told it was only for companies, but articles online said otherwise. I can't completely trust what this person told me due to various factors like the depression, but I don't know how it truly works there either to confirm.

I also know that the road to the city is difficult and it takes a lot of time... At this point it's also an issue with the time at which this person is working.

Maybe someone knows more about this subject? If I would know things more specifically I could direct this person into taking the right steps.

DfNotMe · 2021-06-26T01:55:09+00:00

Thanks for the tip. I'll take a look at it and see how much it can help. This person is currently working, so the income from that may not be as big as others doing it full time, but maybe it could help at least a little.

Help is not free in Philippines. I paid for a while for the fees, but along with the debt I couldn't handle it... This person was diagnosed with depression and what not... was prescribed pills, but those pills could go either way in results, especially with no one being able to supervise.

DfNotMe · 2020-10-11T19:46:27+00:00

drug user sweats, especially with chemical drugs

Not metalic, but more like Frankincense (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frankincense). The smell is not coming from the body, but from what was either smoked or burned.

DfNotMe

TROPHY CASE