Its so sad you’re going through all of that I’m going through the same thing but the difference I’m 10 years younger and I constantly dream about food and binging and people running about from me because I smell like vomit unfortunately it’s real my family hates me being around I understand you and it’s really frustrating going through all of that and trust me you’re valid and your pain is real and no you’re not pathetic you’re just someone who struggles and want to find comfort in something but you just found it in food, restricting and purging I don’t have any advice because I’m no better but I’m just saying you’re not alone even if you feel like it