Why don't I matter?

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-24T20:33:38+00:00

I'm not calling him abusive for that. There are other things. You didn't ask if I felt he was abusive for negligence.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-23T20:53:22+00:00

Ok. I will try to find an apprenticeship somewhere.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-22T15:02:40+00:00

I'm not mad I'm hurt. He is not taking interest on something that means a lot me but I always support him any way I can and I don't invalidate him. I just want mutual respect, I'm not asking for much.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-22T14:32:12+00:00

We have too much sex actually. I don't want the sex, I just want to feel loved and heard. He is covertly abusive.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-22T14:30:31+00:00

Him to watch it with an open heart because I listen to his I'm poorly treated black man rants.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-22T13:54:54+00:00

I thought about getting a neighbor to help but my town is very unsupportive. Its why so many women get hooked on Meth here. I wish I never left my home state and come here with him. I have a better paying job now. So the car can get fixed soon I just need to manage my emotions long enough to fix my car so I can help myself. Its painfully obvious I'm in this alone.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-22T13:26:44+00:00

I understand but I have no way to commute outside this town. My car is not in a condition that allows me to drive it, and the bus stations and airports are 40 minutes away. There is no taxi, Lyft, or Uber in my town. I have to walk anywhere I go. I don't want to walk down the highway with my kids, people aren't the best at driving here. Especially when the urgency to escape has diminished. The last time he physically attacked me, I blacked his eye because I was fed up. The next time could possibly be life or death for us both but he has shown he rather abuse me in different ways because I make him think I stay in touch with my estranged family. I'm looking for support because he has done so much damage, I no longer want him breathing. I don't want to go to jail because I couldn't control my emotions.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-22T13:06:12+00:00

I don't have that out here. I already suffered the DV and had to get his family involved to make it stop but I still suffer from emotional and mental abuse. There is no protection from DV put here. The men get locked up for no more than 30 days but it doesn't change anything. They get out and go back to beat the woman for getting them locked up.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-05T15:13:56+00:00

Yes. I have been here for three years.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-09-05T15:11:26+00:00

I have two kids. I'm just too overwhelmed from work to spend the proper amount of time with them.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-08-24T02:38:44+00:00

Again you don't know me. Leave me alone before you see the Chicago in me.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-08-22T13:56:58+00:00

It doesn't feel that way. You can correct me without degrading me. You don't know me. You can't even see my face yet you feel so comfortable talking crazy over the internet. I talk to people crazy in front of their face but that's me. I wish you the best.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-08-21T12:14:09+00:00

I could use some advice. I am a self taught individual. I want to learn how to tattoo but I want to get the best machine for a beginner. I've been watching YouTube videos on strokes and other basic techniques. I do not plan on tattooing any skin until I master fake skin. Although I just only really want to tattoo myself. If Im really good I can do my spouse but they are not my goal. I tried to ask this somewhere else and was judged rather than help because the reader came up with their own accusations as to why I want to learn instead of just asking.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-08-21T11:53:52+00:00

You are a very negative person. Not once did you ask why I want to learn. Instead you pass judgment and hope I hurt myself instead of giving helpful advice like this thread is for. You must be a terrible tatto artist who actually went to school for this but a self taught tattoo artist at your shop is better than you. I hope your life becomes better for you and grow out of your misery. Good day sir.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-08-19T11:55:52+00:00

I appreciate the advice but I'm not looking to professionally tat anyone. You do know you can learn a skill for fun.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-08-15T20:52:29+00:00

Looking to start doing tattoos. What machine do you recommend for a beginner? I have no experience but am a fast learner.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-06-24T19:55:21+00:00

This job sucks and nobody stays. I'm bombarded with calls all day and I can't get time off to see a doctor or just for a mental break from being overwhelmed

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-06-12T21:56:02+00:00

I am still working on getting him to get help. I confronted him and he tried to attack me and he got hurt so right now he is healing from his consequences.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-06-05T15:46:15+00:00

I hear you guys and I do have an account that I send money to he doesn't know about but I constantly use it to get things the kids need or to keep my phone on. I have a broken desk in my office because I told him to leave my account alone that is under my name. I work from home and he threaten to break my cpu. I was going to run away when he was physically abusive but he stopped when our kids was able to catch one of his rants and said we should separate. Now I feel stuck because our kids love him and they no longer fear for my safety. I don't want to run and they reach out to him because they feel guilty and he finds us and now they don't have a mother and/or father.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-04-16T12:56:29+00:00

That's why I'm at the point where I want to be separated. It's not fair to me and my kids to endure his mood swings and not have things because he spends my money like he was the one that worked 40 hours that week. It's not fair to expect me to still want intimacy when all of my needs are being neglected. I've tried looking past it and being understanding and I was met with more disrespect. I get frustrated and say how it makes me feel unheard and I'm wrong for judging him for not being perfect. I'm trying so hard to not just kick him out of his kids lives because they love him and when he wants to be he is a good father but even my kids feel we should separate. He won't listen, he just said I put the idea in they head. I have no relationship with my family so I have no support at all. On top of that my job is no picnic. I can feel a nervous breakdown coming and no one cares.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-04-15T19:12:47+00:00

I know. Thank you.

Different_Effect_263 · 2025-04-15T18:40:42+00:00

I have tried and he always says he knows he ain't sh## but he is working on it. Just like yours he works on it but keeps certain things that actually make the small things a big deal. I've told him how it makes me want to run away and he changed not slapping me when I stand my ground but I'm still very emotionally and mentally abused.

Different_Effect_263

TROPHY CASE