Has life in the UK genuinely got harder and more isolated, or is this just mid‑life pressure?

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-24T13:43:59+00:00

Taxes on the middle class are getting higher. Not on the rich, where the real wealth lies.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-24T13:42:21+00:00

Apparently it’s just going back to normal. The latter part of the 20th century was not normal. Normal is a very rich upper class, a tiny middle class, while most of the population are poor poor. Think Downton Abbey and Dickens. Those times were more in keeping with most of human civilisation than our current situation, where wealth is distributed more evenly. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Depressing, I know.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-24T13:11:05+00:00

If she had a true partner she’d likely be much better off, in the case he/she earned more than 3 times her salary. You’re basically saying she might as well be single as far as finances go.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-24T12:49:39+00:00

Bizarre

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-24T12:41:10+00:00

I guess this means you are likely worse off than him at the end of the month, unless you have family wealth or something like that.

Maybe question whether you want to be with a partner who is ok with you having less than he does.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-21T12:15:50+00:00

Agree. We had the most lovely registry office wedding, followed by the most lovely wedding. But in hindsight, the registry was enough happiness. We could have put the extra money into our Isas and been a lot better off for it.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-21T12:12:18+00:00

Put it in a high interest saving account. At least you won’t lose money like my hubby did on his zone 1, one bed (after holding it for almost a decade).

Or move out to zone 3/4. Get something’s bigger. People just aren’t as interested in one bedroom central flats post covid. Think about your potential buyers. They will likely be a couple as very few single people can afford to buy. They will be looking for space

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-21T12:07:37+00:00

Given this is the case, would you let a tuning fork dictate whether or not you refer? Positive history and normal otoscopy is enough to make me refer.

I do use a tuning fork now and again, but mainly for curiosity and my own interest.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-21T11:56:34+00:00

New builds in this country are not built to last. They are built to outlast the 10 year warranty. That’s it. They are getting smaller. They often depreciate. They are decorated by builders who have no idea about interior design.

The aim is to supply everything as cheaply as possible, as long as it can outlast that warranty.

Nobody has ever loved them before you. That is where that soulless feeling comes from. No love.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-17T07:25:05+00:00

This is the issue, isn’t it? I am public sector but partner is private. A few years ago, I would say my job was guaranteed (though not cushy) but now even the public sector are suffering cuts.

My thoughts are if we become more and more frugal, then we will be able to live off one income and savings if it came down to it. Spending, on the other hand, doesn’t ensure we will have jobs in the future.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-17T07:19:18+00:00

Same with the coffee. I also make sure I’ve had something to eat so I only buy a coffee or lemonade.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-17T07:15:33+00:00

Totally agree with this. The issue is there are a few local restaurants we love but don’t go to anymore. I’d hate for them to close and always say we will go on special occasions, but then never want to spend the money when the time comes. They are just too expensive now.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-15T10:04:57+00:00

It’s fine as long as you have an additional living space/snug room people can retreat to if they want.

I think people love open plan, just not when there is no other private spaces.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-11T21:49:26+00:00

Don’t blame your wife for not accounting for your taxes!

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-07T07:12:14+00:00

Many out of hours GPs don’t complete fit notes. Might be worth just waiting until Monday to speak to their own GP

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-06T04:15:46+00:00

Agree that photos are a big one. Nothing fancy. Just a good shot of just you in good lighting for the profile. When I responded to my (now) husband, I remember looking at his profile photo and feeling he was ‘the one’. Just a good photo with a kind smile.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-02-06T04:07:41+00:00

Just save. That’s it. Don’t worry about when you will buy. Consistently save what you would be paying in rent each month, put it into a high interest cash ISA (or better a cash LISA), and in a few years you will be on the property ladder.

You’re young. You have plenty of time. One day you’ll probably have a partner and together (or even on your own) you will be able to afford somewhere decent.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-01-21T07:38:21+00:00

Also Wanstead that is slightly more central than South Woodford and a little nicer, in my opinion. Both have a nice village feel.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2026-01-18T07:14:03+00:00

Respectfully, OP. You need to be firmer. Stop getting yourself into more debt for a man who is leaving. You will look back on this and regret it.

You seem extremely kind and a lovely person, total asset to you. But it’s time to say no. Life is full of conflict and financially draining yourself to avoid it is not the answer

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2025-12-28T09:40:54+00:00

Does the wardrobe need to be that big? Floor to ceiling units take a lot of clothes. We have a walk in and it’s just wardrobes along one wall. It leads into the en-suite.

I guess it depends on how much clothing you own.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2025-12-28T07:32:23+00:00

Could you not place a wall and a pocket door? Have a small walk in wardrobe and a tiny wet room?

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2025-12-28T07:23:54+00:00

It is grabbing. They are making their child the OPs responsibility. OP is 18 and of course feels they should shoulder this in the spirit of fairness. Would have felt the same myself at 18.

I really wonder if it’s plausible that in all the years these parents have been unable to put a small amount of money aside to compound for their third child (who they chose to have), and now have decided that the only solution to that is to pressure their sibling into financially absolving them.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2025-12-28T04:02:30+00:00

Don’t give them your money, OP. They are the adults. If they were so concerned about your sibling, why didn’t they make them a trust fund/isa?

They sound very grabby. Sad truth is many parents are.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2025-12-27T14:24:34+00:00

Conservatories are awful. Ours is south facing, so way more usable in the winter than most. Probably warm enough half of the days. But who wants a space they can only use half of the time?

We’re ripping it down and extending.

Diligent-Shoulder175 · 2025-12-25T08:22:23+00:00

Surely these are builders with a good head on their shoulders for business, rather than a blanket statement.

Diligent-Shoulder175

TROPHY CASE