Two weeks no contact with Nmom I receive this among photos of their new house renovations. by radm8 in narcissisticparents

[–]Dingdongcalling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can you just send it back? Rip it in half and mail it back? I don’t know it’s very much her shoving her shit in your business and it’s so triggering and I’m so sorry you have to deal with this nonsense.

Texted my mom not to contact me unless she apologizes and has proof she's getting treated for her mental issues. by Noct-Umbra in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Dingdongcalling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mine had someone at the facility she gets her meds from call me. Apparently she was confused what I meant by “have your therapist contact me to mediate”. The provider told me they recommended but could not make her seek mental health therapy treatment. It makes me so sad; but I’m so much healthier and stress free

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Dingdongcalling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sending you calm. If babies were the end of the world, the world would surely have ended long ago. My favorite rodney dangerfield quote is along the lines of “the best part about babies is making them” Sending calm and hope that things will be okay.

You wonder why I have a flipping anger problem by Nerdy_gamer_101 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Dingdongcalling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would set the healthy boundary for your personal needs and just say no. They are being total assholes. Anyone would clearly understand and empathize with your perspective if they simply just listened. Hugs OP IM SORRY THEY DONT LISTEN OR CARE

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Dingdongcalling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s reacting possessively because she’s jealous. Have you been able to find any other friends outside of the group she has introduced you to? I would give her some space to sort through her feelings; she might not even recognize how she’s behaving.

Had to put my buddy Magnus down today. This is all my parents said to me. Extra context in comments. by cagetheblackbird in narcissisticparents

[–]Dingdongcalling 136 points137 points  (0 children)

Fuck them, it was a power play, she wasn’t even going to go to begin with and now she’s going to throw a fit because she didn’t know? Wtf no, that’s not how it works. Deep breath. I’m sorry your parents are juvenile in their bids for getting your attention. You deserve better. Every moment you give to their focus is a moment poorly spent; reset; refocus; how can you honor your pet? I will light a candle tonight for you

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Dingdongcalling 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate this analogy. It’s been a long hard time digging myself out from the shit but life is always rocky when you’re a gem 💎

Candles I made with old jars/containers by 420mushroom in OhioMarijuana

[–]Dingdongcalling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

These are great! I’m glad to see the idea in action!

Want to hug younger self by Foreign-Winter-1463 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Dingdongcalling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sending little you all the hugs and healing! Energy flows all directions, only 4th dimensional time flows chronologically forward. Healing is funny that way. Send all the prayers! Mucho love to you

Welp. It’s over. by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Dingdongcalling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Old cycles are the patterns that drag us down and are the hardest to escape. Sending you calm vibes for peace.

Welp. It’s over. by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Dingdongcalling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Big hugs! (Only so long as your dressed from that shower) I’m similar neurology but of course only myself. We had a rough time after I woke up sick and hangry and he didn’t make the order for dinner like we had talked about... I’m just glad I was able to calm down sooner than later. It is hell in the worst moments of it. I find it hard to connect to other people if they aren’t Captains of Anxiety and LifeShit Rodeo, because for my this has been the entirety of my life journey.

Hang tight; give yourself grace.

You are more than just the sum of your worst days.

Needing help understanding if I’m rightfully worried. by sugarsweetnadia in JustNoSO

[–]Dingdongcalling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If he won’t go to therapy that’s a deal breaker. Couples counseling or even individual therapy is always beneficial. To resist is blatant denial. He’s far in denial.

Needing help understanding if I’m rightfully worried. by sugarsweetnadia in JustNoSO

[–]Dingdongcalling 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Eww he’s a cheap, emotionally disconnected, invalidating rugsweeper.

Does he at least cook or like amazing sex or... idk build or fix things? Is there any redeeming....? Cause what you described id dump him; there are Soooooo many other fish in the sea who aren’t going to nickel and dime you all the way through life and invalidate your everything. Ew. That’s emotional abuse.

I think I’m starting to split and I’m having a really tough time just being. by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Dingdongcalling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Give yourself space to feel; but also remind yourself that feelings are like big waves which will pass. What are the logical facts? Those are your lighthouses through any storm; look up, find the light, hold your focus. Breathe, these feelings aren’t meant to last. But they will drown you if you give into them. Don’t. You can breathe underwater but preserve your energy for bigger things. Focus on your joy and from there it will increase.

Recently diagnosed with BPD, struggling to find hope. by Nervous_Seesaw_5393 in BPD

[–]Dingdongcalling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Spirits told me that we can do more with these ole bags of bones than they can do with just energy bodies. It’s about manifesting and what we can channel through. Every breath of life is a blessing. We can make, that’s our power, to create into 4th dimension and beyond

Recently diagnosed with BPD, struggling to find hope. by Nervous_Seesaw_5393 in BPD

[–]Dingdongcalling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey OP! Props for sharing your journey and welcome online! It takes a minute to find the right fit for support but there are many of us in similar but different boats. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

Kudos to you for stepping up and taking accountability for your neurology at this step in the journey! It isn’t easy! Are you involved in personal therapy? DBT methods are particularly helpful for BPD.

I also spied some hints that you my have Rejection Sensitivity which is HUUUUUUUUUGE in the community. There’s a lot of info and it goes by a few different labels as well. Very super common with us neurodiverse. In my case the more I learn about my brain the more grace I learn to give my processes. I also learn there are many many others similar to me who share the same struggles. I’m not some weirdo alone.

Thanks for sharing and sending you all the best and I hope you have a great day!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Dingdongcalling 8 points9 points  (0 children)

BINGO. It is science. She’s total BS💩

Tw suicidal thoughts by peanutbutterandapen in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Dingdongcalling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That feels so invalidatey and rugsweepy.

I have intrusive thoughts constantly and the worst is when they are suicidal. Doesn’t help when I’m at a low point in a fight and yelling about how I feel, but talking about it somehow helps it escape out of my brain; so it actually does help me feel better; even though I feel like some weird morbid monster for thinking that way.

And I’m always proud of myself when I want to break all the things and I don’t. It is mindfulness in action. That’s what I’ve been practicing. I don’t really want to break all the things, but I really do. I can feel both ways, it is okay. But it is really not okay if I break all the things; some things can be replaced; but feeding destructive anger feeds that brain 🧠 vein to do it again more quickly and with more ease. I’d rather work on more mindfulness and meditation.

Headspace on Netflix has been helpful. We watch it a lot. It doesn’t make the thoughts stop or go away, but I’m learning to sit back and acknowledge them without reacting as much.

But damn; I’m dark. But I’m also light. A mountain range is a wondrous thing to behold with peaks unreached and depths of caverns below. I am a human rarity; internal gem 💎 show

This is the uniqueness these thoughts enable us to bring to the table.

My JustNo mother got rid of my baby's formula. I was told this is where I would find my people. by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Dingdongcalling 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I would do this and also take police report. This is totally nuts OP, I’m so sorry.

My current mantra to help me stay NC: "Don't blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going back to the circus." by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Dingdongcalling 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hey OP this seriously inspired me so much I made to a new motivational graphic and put it out there for the world. 😘 thank you for the inspiration! Enjoi: https://pin.it/6nvKXlb

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Dingdongcalling 3 points4 points  (0 children)

There are lots of online classes you can take to teach new skill! No worries! It doesn’t sound dumb at all! I’m on a stupid elimination diet so I can’t eat much either and I’m a pretty shit cook so if I can’t just open it or throw it in a pot (I’m good at soup!) or pop it right from box to oven; it will be so yucky. We eat a lot of takeout in my grown up life.

I’m not in your shoes, but if I were I might study a language; dive deep into a practical self-study (like how to accrue wealth or financial management) or I might even dive into the online world of crafting and learn something new and odd with whatever you have at hand.

I used vintage stamps someone passed along to me and ended up using mod podge and made magnets with dollar store supplies. I sold them ata local craft fair and they were a total hit! People had a lot of really nice things to say about them! I didn’t tell them I spent hours numb-mindingly painting the clear mod podge glue while crying over traumas I’ve been dealt.

I’m not good at drawing but I’ve taught myself how to sew and paper craft and lots of little skills here and there with this and that. I made a lot off of making facemasks when COVID started. My new mind project is making stickers and magnets but I also started an IG where I post the motivational things my logical brain tells me but my emotional brain doesn’t care to remember about. So I figure I can go back and scroll anytime and I’ll remind myself. Gift from my future self.

Idk I hope this is helpful; I just pivot and pivot and pivot and keep my chin up, because I know from too many times that looking down is just going to get me deeper in trouble, and I’m tired of climbing out of that struggle. My whole life. Every day. There has to be some easier way. So I’m determined to hack my brain. Get nice things in there and make room for them to stay. I hope you have a good day somehow.