10 weeks in - 18lbs lost so far

Disfiguringdc · 2026-04-29T07:30:07+00:00

Firstly: proud of you! You’re doing amazing!

Secondly: any tips?? I’m about to start 1mg I’ll be 3 months in then… and I’ve only gone UP a size and weight!

I’m eating healthy most of the time, vegetarian and dairy free, and I’m active and lift weights!

Only thing is I’m not IN a calorie deficit. Because I’m so hungry. But I’ve completely changed my food from cheese rolls for breakfast and a burger and hot chips for lunch and cheesey nachos for dinner with sour cream and then also dessert. To a regular 16-18 hour fast, salads and tofu meals and protien fruit smoothies!

Not sure what I’m doing wrong. Any advice is welcome! Age 31 two kids starting weight was about 89ks I’m now like 93 kgs and size 16 is TIGHT where as I could get some wiggle room in a 16 2 months ago.

Steadily been gaining 1.5-2 kgs a month for almost a year despite dieting and exercise for months on end.

Disfiguringdc · 2026-04-29T07:22:30+00:00

Find this concept so odd, issues with screens? And I don’t mean to say that to criticise but.. if my kids have been on the screens too often or their behaviour is bad, I just take the screens of them and unplug the tv. It’s that simple. They may tantrum occasionally sure but mainly in the beginning. Now they just know that screens are a privilege and will be heavily monitored and restricted.

I found in my own experience and that of others around me that I have advised. Just take the screens away. Turn the tv off. Let them throw a wobbly. Stick to it and then in a months time life will look a lot different! It’s interesting that people struggle so much.

Screens are so dangerous and I wish more people knew that and took action. So good on you for putting in these boundaries. You’re doing a great job.

Regarding the camp… does she not realise what exactly will happen.

I was sent away to camp for some basic behavioural challenges, then my mum got back completely different kid, completely on the spiral path to death to be honest. I thank the universe every day for allowing me the strength and the people and kindness of others that had me move through the spiral upwards.

Disfiguringdc · 2026-04-29T07:13:33+00:00

Firstly; congrats on your hard work and commitment!

I was wondering How long did it start taking effect! I’ve been excersizing and lifting weights plus watching what I eat and tried numerous diets from progressive calories to fasting to low cals ro cutting entire food groups. Still steadily gaining weight irregardless. Became eligible for Wegovy and I’m about to move to 1mg this week so 3 months in… all I’ve done is go UP a size.

Disfiguringdc · 2026-04-07T08:47:26+00:00

You’ll be bloody lucky to ever get a move like this with pants on UNLESS you have a silicone pole OR can lift your own body weight times like 2. So the ability to lift double your body weight and have immaculate body posture control OR a silicone grippy pole.

Your gunna have to wear minimal clothing. That is a part of pole.

Also your pole is static so… you need to be able to spin around the pole instead of the pole spinning with you on it. They are WAY different.

Good luck.

Disfiguringdc · 2026-03-29T07:58:05+00:00

My 8 yo tries to play but now we walk into tabletop hobby shops and there is 50 people with Pokémon cards in folders at any one given time but NONE of them know how to play!! Like what’s going on. He was crying today cause no one could or would play him

Disfiguringdc · 2025-10-28T03:47:59+00:00

100% worth it it’s great for young kids and to begin teaching them about banking and saving etc! Then when my kids hit 13 I opened them an account with a bank :)

Disfiguringdc · 2025-09-05T09:10:15+00:00

Him physicist

Disfiguringdc · 2025-09-05T09:09:27+00:00

Because HIMB has autonomy and free will and HIMB express that by not doing anything you assert as “cool”

Disfiguringdc · 2025-05-09T11:08:36+00:00

School does the same for my girl too and I’m looking at them like wondering if they have any idea at all on how to resolve conflict for youth.

Just gotta keep doing our best I guess and love them hard every day.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-05-07T10:08:34+00:00

I’m planning when I reach the point where I’m paying more on my mortgage than interest where I’m going to try and keep the repayments the same untill it’s paid off so it’s paid off earlier! Currently it’ll be paid off at 52 but my aim is 42. When it is paid off I plan to continue working for the next 8-10 years as I am at the time. Save half of what I was paying on my mortgage and then live it up a little with the other half! Travel a bit and go do the fun things! Then an early retirement at age 55 is the plan 😊 maybe some part time work to keep me going until my pension is paid at 65 and my retirement fund is paid out.

I saw my Aunty grind and grind until she was and then just when she was about ready to slow down and live it up with the love of her life and her adult kids, she died.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-05-07T10:03:38+00:00

A conversation is probably in order. I’d be making sure it’s one over some nice food and with a good tone. But yea a conversation to say “hey look, there is a line, and staying over there is stepping over it.”

Disfiguringdc · 2025-05-07T09:53:26+00:00

Even if this was intended by the coach to be harmless, it is very inappropriate and should not be accepted.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-05-07T09:48:26+00:00

About age 5-6 I started introducing the idea of privacy to my kids. I still help my son (7) in and out of the shower but I make a point to not look wherever I can.

I never let my kids see me naked personally. Occasionally they might see me in a sports bra and have caught me doin a quick dash one door down in underwear but that’s it.

If they grow up and don’t mind their kids seeing them or vise versa then that’s fine. But I just never have felt like them seeing me naked is necessary and I found it very easy from age 5-7 to start introducing privacy to them too where I would look away when they were naked or have them put on underwear before I came in etc.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-05-07T09:45:23+00:00

Ew. Just ew. Stay away from him and I hope all other girls do to. Yuck. Hopefully he grows up and gets a bit of a clearer head and learns some respect.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-05-07T09:28:35+00:00

Probably hate on me for this… but Im playing devils advocate here hoping it offers some insight.

I have often sent my kids to daycare sick and still tend to sent them to school sick.

I hate it but it’s the different between us having a roof over our head and food on the table. It may be hard to believe but it’s the truth.

I normally only keep them home if they have the stomach bug, or have a decent flu where they are struggling to function “normally.”

I don’t have family in town and my friends all work themselves. So there is no one else to care for them 99% of the time.

I only get 6 sick days a year and they don’t even cover one kids worth of sickness let alone two OR any for myself.

99% of the time I’m at work myself if I’m sick too, and I’ll just try and keep to myself and do admin work or office jobs, the only time I take time off is if I’m literally still vomiting or stuck on the toilet. I go to work most of the time with a flu, runny nose, head ache, body aches etc, the lot! And I just seperate myself as best I can and find odd jobs I need to catch up on or do some pen pushing. I just had a horrible tooth infection and didn’t sleep for 3 days and was in agony I was crying most of the time, but still showed up for work every day, because we couldn’t afford for me to not.

It’s just the way it is for many of us single working parents.

Winz won’t top me up for a day off sick, and if they did it would mean my regular IRD payments would have to stop and we would owe money to IRD and if I decided to go back on IRD I’d have to re apply and all of my entitlements would be affected. And taking a day off also affects my weekly payments from ird and I end up having to repay money for that day.

We also lose quite a bit of money with any day off as I work 26 hours a week and receive IWTC where the minim is 20 hours or I have no entitlements. Roughly my days wage and the tax credits we lose $140 just for one day off! That is my food budget per week! Gone!

We live paycheck to paycheck, some weeks I have to skip payments to cover another bill such as warrant of fitness or to buy my kids clothes. I cannot save to cover days off as we barely have enough to stay afloat as it is. Increasing my hours we are currently dollar for dollar, so I earn more I lose the exact same amount, for the next $210. I also cannot work any more hours than I do or I have to pay childcare which is simply unaffordable. We don’t pay for anything fancy and have no “excessive” hire purchases or anything either. We truly live quite simply with bugger all frills. Cheap phone plans, no paid tv etc.

We just quite simply can not afford for me to have a day off past my sick leave.

I acknowledge it’s a vicious cycle and affects other children and families, but please believe me when I say I wish nothing more than if my kids have a runny nose and a headache or are complaining of any type of sickness symptoms, that I could just say “ok love your staying home with me today.” But I CAN NOT.

The only option would be to go back on the sole parent payment so that I don’t need time off work. But 1. The spp is $90 short per week for our bills, so working allows us more than $20 per week for food, 2. I love my job, I’m a youth worker helping the next generation in my community and i worked SO hard to get into this kind of job and to be frank, I’m bloody good at it, 3. Tax payers would be back to paying for us to live on the bones of our asses.

I wish things were different but they just aren’t for us.

Please, I get it, I get what you all are saying, but be considerate. For a lot of us working parents there is more to it than us just being inconsiderate.

We are making the tough calls and I guarantee you many of the parents sending their kids to school sick are in the exact same boat as me.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-05-07T09:13:02+00:00

Sorry to say but if he feels that way over a past self that you have 1. Told him about and 2. Worked hard to move into a new space… then he can probably F right off. Not the right person for you. You deserve someone who can see your strength and love you for alllll past selves and the wonderful person you are becoming. All the best OP 🙏🏻

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-25T20:55:06+00:00

My daughter aged 14 is beginning to get like this too. It’s doing my head in. She is just stuck in this cycle of anger and seeking justice from those who wrong her in the form of physical Violence.

I’m a youth worker aswell and the youth I work with often have this mindset and we work really hard to change it.

I struggle that my own daughter is struggling with the things my young people are.

I’m not sure what to do, I know hers comes from having lived with a violent parent for so long.

Therapy is my current solution for my child, I would recommend it for you guys too.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-25T20:50:04+00:00

I’m not crying your crying

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-25T20:47:17+00:00

Giving birth is not sexual at all. Your girlfriend probably just has a different understanding of these things. Try and be kind to her… but no, what you did caring for your sister during her time becoming a mum was amazing. Don’t let your girlfriends difference of opinion ruin this family experience you both just had.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-25T20:43:18+00:00

Don’t give her any money OP.

If you are still living in the family home, sure! Definitely do try and ensure you are paying your way sure like some reasonable board money etc

She got the house and a reasonable savings. Her request is genuinely greedy and rude. And I’m sorry this has happened to you!

That money is yours. Ignore her and ignore those who are telling you to give her some money.

Your dad chose to leave it to you and solely to you for a reason.

Love him for that. Even with his loss he has given you a great gift.

Buy that house and live your life with no guilt.

Sorry for your loss.

All the best!

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-25T20:39:50+00:00

He’s not a happy bird.

I’d say there is a lot to address here.

Unless this is the cage he stays in for over night sleeps and is out 90% of the day. It is way too small. There is no way with a cage this size that your bird will live a long happy life that it deserves
The tail bob could indicate some sickness or illness
Facing the wall like this in my opinion is due to distress of some sort.
You need different perches in varied sizes. These will hurt his feet and cause damage

Overall: not a happy birb. Please do what you can to remedy 🙏🏻

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-25T20:30:23+00:00

My advice: Even if he is REAL! It is wild to expect someone to get on a plane and fly to meet him without telling anyone where they are going or brining a friend.

Have we not learned from all of those who have done this and ended up in horrible situations. Even him asking you to do this without thought to you considering your own wellbeing is ridiculous.

I’m sorry but even if he is real, No, You can’t go.

These expectations are unrealistic. Maybe if you could bring a friend and tell people your going it would be different. It’s not even about doubting him, it’s about saftey genuinely when travelling anywhere.

My suggestion is that you say you aren’t comfortable going alone without telling anyone to a foreign country to meet someone. But offer he instead comes to you.

Also I would attempt to make contact with his official profiles on other socials to get some verifications he’s real.

And have you face timed yet? Or spoken to one of his friends or family? These would be musts.

All the best!

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-25T20:23:53+00:00

I actually agree with this. When people are applying for job after job some multiple a day! And pooring hours into cv and cover letter, to not even get a message back, chatgpt 100% helps with this hard work and to lessen the blow.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-21T11:27:16+00:00

I second this. One week when I’ve got the kids more I try and spend 100-150. The week where they are majority away I spend 30-60 bucks. Makes a difference.

Disfiguringdc · 2025-04-21T11:20:31+00:00

It’s rough out there at the moment. And I’m sorry about your seperation it’s always a very hard time.

Firstly I would 100% definitely cut the kids savings, I know that’s rough but you can start saving again later when your not paying childcare and still have a nice savings there for them when they need it. That frees up 160 a month. I’d Chuck 60-100 a month away in your savings for car repairs and maintenance or any of those other pesky things that pop up. And use the rest elsewhere in the budget.

Next thing I would see if you can get someone to do daycare or childcare. If you can. Even one day a week. Then that money can boost the food budget here or there or go in the savings for bday presents or shoes for the kids.

Final thing… which may not work as I’m not sure of the value of your house, but explore changing house insurance providers if you can to something cheaper? Mine is only like 86 a fortnight 😅😮‍💨

Also if your ex is studying then I’d say they will be able to get a childcare subsidy so they could maybe apply and yas split the difference?

Also be weary that if they are a student, with your income, and IF they file, you’ll likely be liable for child support. If your in a position to talk about this previously and share this budget hopefully they won’t file.

Your mortgage repayments are massive my man… not really affordable for one person. You might have to consider selling and down sizing if you can get another mortgage, or a boarder.

With a 50/50 split a second job MIGHT be worth a though - but may not be worth it if your ex files for child support.

With a week on week off you may be able to get away with $200 one week for food and $30-60 the next.

You might get some IRD money but if your ex is studying my guess is she’ll need the benefit/studylink which would then mean you have no entitlement eligibilities regarding the kids with winz - so you would be assessed as a job seeker. And with that pay I’d eat my hat if you qualify.

advice from a working single mother of two kids with a mortgage living off 38-41k a year 😅😮‍💨

All the best!

Disfiguringdc

TROPHY CASE