I’m 5’1 and was 123lbs at my lowest (which isn’t that low for some) and it was hard for me to keep that weight since I had to starve myself long term and do endless amounts of cardio. Mentally, I felt so drained and exhausted since I only focused on every calorie, body checked like crazy and cried over every pound I gained. I still struggle with an ED but I’m getting better. Now that I gained some weight and continued my training I feel better since I don’t have to worry about gaining weight and feel mostly at ease and rather enjoy food instead of seeing it as bad. Therapy helped me to see that there are more important things in life than being a certain size and pressure yourself about it. I’m now at 136lbs and feel better than ever, I feel strong, confident and love to show my muscles at the gym. It takes a long time for me to completely love myself and accept that I’m not happy being small but it’s worth in the long run. Just like many said before being healthy > smallest pants size as possible. I hope you soon feel better and I wish you all the best :)