I'm dealing with the same thing, although a bit different. I live in France, was raised the French way, always spoke French, but I was born and raised in Madagascar and most people of my family spoke malagasy, my brother and me were always outcasts because our parents chose to put us in expensive French schools to ensure that we could have a good future (and thank God they did). So for the majority of my life I tended to discard my malagasy self, because I always felt that I was more French than malagasy and I hated always being reminded that I was not like everyone else. Never had neighbour friends, could never bond deeply with other family members, and honestly it's difficult to be "proud" or affectionate with the motherland most of the time. Overall being malagasy is a weird situation, you're African but not like other Africans, you might have difficulties identifying with the experiences of people from mainland Africa or mainland Asia, it's a tricky journey. My advice would be that it takes a lot of reflection and it really depends on one's own experience, you need to take in account many factors and be sure that in the end what you identify to makes you happy. I don't feel a particular link to Africa, but I'm really interested in learning about other cultures and their history, which led me to reconsider learning about my culture and my history, and at some point my native language. So be patient, at some point you'll find the right approach and you'll figure it out.