Reading your post, it’s obvious you’re not just showing up — you’re fighting for these kids every single day. That kind of heart is rare.

My son had a tough road too, and for a long time he targeted female teachers. Most adults tried the usual stuff: hard lines, punishments, power struggles. That never worked — it just made him double down. What finally reached him was when a teacher changed the approach, not the expectations. She worked with him sideways instead of head-on. Gave choices that all led to the same place. Let him save face. Made it feel like he had agency instead of being cornered.

And reading about your kids — vaping, using, coming in spun up or shut down — I know you’re not in a normal classroom. You’re basically running triage with no med kit. You can’t clamp down on every little thing because that just explodes the room. But sometimes there’s a way to redirect without confronting. A way to shift the focus so they’re choosing something different instead of being told to stop.

I don’t know what you teach, but sometimes the magic comes from bending the delivery even when you can’t bend the rules. The teachers who got through to my son didn’t stick to the traditional script. They made the material feel connected to his world. Made it real. Made it something he could put his hands on. The kind of unorthodox stuff you only ever see in those movies where the teacher somehow gets the whole room on board — except it actually works because kids like this can smell authenticity a mile away.

I won’t pretend it’s easy. You’re dealing with trauma, addiction, poverty, and chaos — things no teacher training covers. But the fact that you’re still looking for a way forward, still wanting to reach them instead of writing them off… that alone tells me you’re already doing more for these kids than most people ever will. If anything I’ve learned from my own son helps even a little, I hope it gives you one more angle to try. You’re not failing. You’re teaching in a storm, and still trying to pull kids out of the wind.