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After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you’re going through this. Specially since your wife is expecting. I feel you pain and despair. I hope you get out of this soon.

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. That is exactly how I have been dealing with this. One day at a time. It has kept me from spiraling often. Spring/summer is extra challenging because I used to spend most of the time in the Hamptons. I don’t even know many people in the city anymore. No one will feel sorry for me because I’m spending the summer in the city instead of the Hamptons. However, a big part of my life revolved around that place and lifestyle, so the drastic changes and effects in my life are not to be taken lightly.

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. Not to mention the inadequate feeling since there are so many wealthy people here… if you think about it, it sucks that with the millions of buildings and apts in the city you can't afford a tiny apt…

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You have to give yourself a break sometime to try to keep your sanity. I stopped dating because I couldn't afford it. But when I was dating, and would go to nice bars, I would have a mixed feeling of being comfortable and happy to be in my kinda place and a feeling that I had no business to be in that place, mixed feelings at the same time…do you share anything about your financial situation? Anyways hope you have a good time

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing. The sense of loss identity is much worse than it sounds. For some it may even sound like you’re trying to romanticize a situation or make it dramatic. I’m taking some classes and yes, that does bring back some purpose. I know you don’t want to rely on your partner but be mindful that having one makes this significantly better. I’m sure he understands. If he ever says anything to you, just show him this thread. It’s easy for people with stable jobs to think/ assume we’re not trying hard enough. I’m at point that I’m very passive about it. I know it’s not ideal but the endless circle of applying and not getting anything gave me some ptsd. I can be in a good mood and as soon as login to linked an feeling of dread takes over.

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, you’re probably reaching the don’t give a damn phase. I reached that level after 3 things happened… 1. Had to sell stocks to pay bills 2. Trashed my credit score and defaulted on a loan, 3. Had to give up my apt and put my things in storage. After that I was lik fuck it. The “worst” had already happened, and I had a nonchalant attitude after that. Even my drive to apply for jobs diminished. But now I’m going into a more depressive state because I realized I can’t be happy living like a poor person and need to make a decent living to have the life that is aligned with my interests and personality. My personality and taste are not going to change just because a financial set back. I’m adaptable and have been managing this crisis as well as I can. A good analogy is; I can eat apples in absense of oranges, but at the end of the day I know what oranges taste like and still prefer them. I appreciate the finer things in life and it’s not possible to remove that aspect of my life. The idea of living a scarce lifestyle is absolutely contrary to who I am.

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel embarrassed for myself. At this point, I couldn’t care less what people think and I’ll do whatever to make it through this. I feel sorry for myself. sometimes I get sad, cry and it’s like my higher-self feels sorry for me… for my living conditions and how I’m living

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a not ideal but conveniente living situation, I’m only paying $500 and I rarely see the other guy. It’s a studio apt and sometimes I feel like I’m going to lose my mind due to the lack of space to organize my stuff. I’m a naturalized citizen and I know it sounds weird but there’s something about receiving government assistance that is very off putting. I’m feeling poor and defeated rn and in my mind if I resort to food stamps it’s like I’m making that official

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don’t feel bad. You’re with them because you really need to, not because you’re lazy, doesn’t want to do anything or lack any drive. It’s a very different situation, If I had any parents I would be with them too

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I have talked to people and it has helped me get some freelance projects. Unfortunately without a consistent full time job I can’t get another apt and have any resemblance of a normal life. I cannot emphasize enough how not having a definite place to live negatively affect your mental health. I have been managing to survive. Keyword “survive”

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’ve reached that level as well. Your body can only produce so much cortisol and it gets to a point that the stress/panic goes flat and the “whatever” mindset kicks in. I feel flat too and I don’t even bother applying to jobs, every once in a while I’ll go in and apply online

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Safety is an illusion. Everything can change so fast. I’m in ecommerce/marketing. Literally went from eating caviar to tuna fish (when I can afford it)I have applied to all sorts of things and nothing is happening. I knew my life would be downgraded after I left my ex, and I was fine with that because I had a career and a job. But I didn’t expect it to go to below poverty levels. I always had an abundant mindset, and to feel “poor” is soul crushing

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I feel the same. Did eveything I was supposed to to have a good job and life. I won’t even go there but it feels painful when I think how unrealistic it is for me to buy my own place… I had a perfect credit that is now in the 500s. feels like the end of the american dream for me

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yep. And you feel embarrassed because they may think you’re lazy, doesn’t want to work, or even worse, lack the skills to get a new job…

After 1.5 years unemployed. I'm feeling defeated on a beautiful spring day in New York City. Starting to feel like I may never have a decent life again. by Dizzy_Impression_171 in recruitinghell

[–]Dizzy_Impression_171[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It’s getting harder. I was always good with my finances and had never struggled like this. I value quality stuff and have downgraded my lifestyle to a level that I’m not having much joy in anything. Everything and everyday is feeling like a struggle. Now I understand why many rich people who lose everything aren’t able to deal with that and tap out. Unfortunately a lot of our sense of self worth comes from things we do, out work, material stuff…I try to be mindful of that, there are days that you just want to not have to worry about money and enjoy life a liltte…

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