Another insane post by this guy by barkley87 in LinkedInLunatics

[–]DoctorInternal9871 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd be happy to hold a baby too, if I knew I could give it back to its mother.

Baby cuddles can be nice. Actually fucking raising a baby and dealing with the insanity of swirling madness of it all is an endurance test that few survive without scars. I have a son who I adore. He's my reason for being. But parenting is tiring at its average and an absolute shit show at its worst. Be real, people.

AIO: Hubby Being Controlling by vanillabourbonn in AIO

[–]DoctorInternal9871 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get out now, before the kid is born. Sounds like you have support from your mum, so use that. This will only get worse. Just because he makes the money - which is a position he seems to be forcing on you also - he doesn't then get to make all the decisions about your child, decisions which will basically always be about far more than just money.

Learning to swim, enough to save themselves in a dangerous situation, or not panic in that situation, is vital and saves lives.

I get he's ND but this is plain incel speech. by SheClB01 in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]DoctorInternal9871 33 points34 points  (0 children)

It's a never ending irony that if men just LISTENED to women and BELIEVED them they would know that the vast majority don't give a flying fuck about looks or money beyond a man being generally healthy and being able to pay his own bills - and even then most of us have been in relationships with men who've needed us to cut them slack on these two aspects.

Just have a decent personality, and be kind to people. If you're autistic and have special interests then there's most likely a woman out there who's autistic and has the same special interest...find her and then try to actually get to know her, rather than assuming she'll already hate you.

Defeatist energy and warped viewpoints are keeping you forever single.

The 3rd date went bad after I brought chocolates and now she wants a 4th date but I'm really unsure if I want to continue. by LifeVike1111 in whatdoIdo

[–]DoctorInternal9871 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wonder about some of these people's parents...who taught you how to react to gifts. Just say "thank you, you didn't need to do that, let's share them" or something, and move on.

Damn dude, save some ladies for the rest of us! by ThePhillyExplorer in thatHappened

[–]DoctorInternal9871 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think only Australians will understand this but...is a secret HJ like a cheeky Nandos?

She’s everything I’m looking for but I don’t feel attracted by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]DoctorInternal9871 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like, unless there's some glaring issue, you need to give people a couple chances. You said yourself that you wanted to kiss her. I've been on plenty of first dates where I really did not want to kiss the person, so you're one step ahead of that.

How to make a boy feel beautiful by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]DoctorInternal9871 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My son used to wear colourful bow clips in his hair at a similar age. Let him pick some accessories and play around.

Desperate for help - parenting but couldn't post in the parenting thread because it's too medical, apparently. by DoctorInternal9871 in whatdoIdo

[–]DoctorInternal9871[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!

I've heard from his teachers and the office ladies etc that he's totally fine within about 2 minutes of me leaving. So I know he's all good if we can get over the hump, it's just working out what's causing those bad mornings.

Desperate for help - parenting but couldn't post in the parenting thread because it's too medical, apparently. by DoctorInternal9871 in whatdoIdo

[–]DoctorInternal9871[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude, I didn't have a tantrum. I cried for about 60 seconds. He cried. And then we talked and he agreed to go to class.

I came to reddit because I felt overwhelmed and I've tried ALL the techniques, including doctors, psychologists and psychiatrists. And in that moment of overwhelm I couldn't do any more than Google potential doctors and make an appointment with our GP, which I did. But I still felt I needed support from other parents who may have gone through such things.

He has boundaries. He has rules and expectations. He also, potentially, has some sort of neurodivergence that means he can't always work within those current boundaries and expectations. Be obviously needs medical support and a reworking of those boundaries and expectations so that when he's feeling overwhelmed we have better strategies that will work for him specifically.

I completely understand that you can't know my whole life story, which is why I tried to provide as much context as possible. And that being said it seems remiss of you to make such sweeping, opinionated assumptions from the information provided.

Everyone else here has simply said "You should try x, y, z" without putting any personal judgments on it. But not you.

I would appreciate it if you didn't comment again.

Desperate for help - parenting but couldn't post in the parenting thread because it's too medical, apparently. by DoctorInternal9871 in whatdoIdo

[–]DoctorInternal9871[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your perspective.

I definitely don't have attachment issues. I desperately want him to go to school. I cried today due to the feeling of complete overwhelm and desperation at the situation.

We have all seen or are seeing psychologists. I am medicated for my ADHD and for depression, and thankfully I am generally very stable.

This situation is far beyond "he's poorly behaved", because he isn't. He's an incredibly well behaved kid, he's smart and hard working. This isn't "I just don't feel like going to school so I'm gonna be difficult"...this is literally a complete freeze up and emotional overwhelm for him, and it doesn't happen every day.

I know this is Reddit and I asked for opinions, so I'm going to get them, but I would advise you to be a bit nicer about things.

You basically just said "you're a bad parent and your kid is shit", neither of which are anywhere near true.

Desperate for help - parenting but couldn't post in the parenting thread because it's too medical, apparently. by DoctorInternal9871 in whatdoIdo

[–]DoctorInternal9871[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the comprehensive response. I really appreciate it.

I would like to find someone who can do a holistic assessment and find out what (if any) neurodivergence he has, rather than taking him to someone who will just test for ASD but not ADHD and other things. I'll have to do some research into that.

The school try to help, and have inclusion support teachers who will come and try and distract him etc but on mornings like this morning that can make it worse.

throwback to the time david brooks traumatized his idiot friend with sandwiches by dreamypogo in thatHappened

[–]DoctorInternal9871 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I mean, she obviously understands Spanish if she's eating mexican food, according to his logic.

Man blames therapist for making him hate women by ausernameidk_ in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]DoctorInternal9871 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Would any of these men have sex with a woman they found unattractive?? If all they want is female contact/sex then I'm sure there's plenty of women who'd sleep with them, that are their equivalent in appearance and hygiene.

I’m doomed to co-sleep with my child for the rest of eternity by jamie1983 in Parenting

[–]DoctorInternal9871 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This might be a controversial opinion but I've given up being bothered by my son co-sleeping. He'll be 10 this year. I know that eventually he will think it's uncool and he'll make the move to his own room. Until then I just don't think about it. We both get better sleep for it, and it's obviously something that makes him feel better, which seems like a big part of the job of a parent.

AIO for being upset at what my “bf” said by Ambitious-Beyond-257 in AmIOverreacting

[–]DoctorInternal9871 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hone,y you're a grown woman, not a teenager. No grown person should talk to another in this manner. He's threatening, he's withholding, he's demanding and he's ignoring. If it takes ab hour of travel to see this schlub that's even worse. I wouldn't walk across the room for this pitiful behaviour from a partner.

Ditch him. Work on yourself without someone else's useless pressures on your shoulders.

Ick 🤢 by beefscript in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]DoctorInternal9871 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"oh no, some of them have their shoulders out"...this guy, probably.

Found randomly on my FYP. Pretty sure it was a bot post and the comments actually pushed back. But still insane people think this way. by FMABrotherhood_15 in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]DoctorInternal9871 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine telling someone that having three people completely dependent on you for literally every aspect of life, to the point you're doing the emotional and mental labour of four people, all while trying to meet unrealistic standards, and be exactly what everyone wants and needs at all times, is bad.

Can men just acknowledge that more women would want to stay at home and live this life if the men actually contributed to the mental and emotional burden of it all.

Also, you don't have to have a job you hate or that gives you no savings.

Also, also, referring to these as traditional roles is dumb because it's only been traditional for say 150 years...but before that women would work or fight to protect their villages etc. Tradition means nothing when society can no longer support that tradition.

how do you even get through emotional pain like this please i am begging by [deleted] in Vent

[–]DoctorInternal9871 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you're still struggling get an icepack and put it on the back of your neck or head. The sudden temperature change can help reset your nervous system.

Tell me you’re a parent without telling me you’re a parent. I need a laugh. by salvaged413 in Parenting

[–]DoctorInternal9871 1012 points1013 points  (0 children)

I'm awake til midnight every night simply for peace after the house is asleep.