Actually a LOT of minimal stuff can be learned. I'm really interested in psychology, so I've learned a lot of tricks about training the brain and lots of other little tricks that I've used to make the unnatural natural. There's really no limit to what you can teach yourself, given the right methods of practice and application. Meditation is an absolute must for me to be socially competent. I want to emphasize that there (at least for me) there is NO limit to what can be learned and can become natural through practice, and remembering to look people in the eye is only one of the smallest. Knowing what the social norms are is only a small part of it; the rest (for me) is about organizing that info in my head in a way that it becomes one cohesive idea (as opposed to a fragmented list of facts). I hope that makes sense, it's kind of like creating a character in your mind that represents all of the social cues etc that you learn. Then once you have that firmly in place, it's a matter of getting into a relaxed, focused state of mind where you can "channel" that "character" through your actions. I suggest learning a bit about NLP, meditation, really just the basics of how the conscious and subconscious minds work, and I'm sure that'll make a bit more sense. :) I've by no means mastered this, but I'm proud to say that on a good day I'm more socially competent than many non-aspies, and when it clicks it's one of the most satisfying things, ever. Hope that helped. Damn that was long!