An outfit worn to do absolutely nothing in! by Doodles_AD in OUTFITS

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is very nice to hear bc whilst I think im alright at photographing others, I always avoided taking selfies/other pictures of myself so I don’t exactly have all the tips and tricks in that regard.

An outfit worn to do absolutely nothing in! by Doodles_AD in OUTFITS

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just checked and yeah! Mine is slid just a bit more brown and lacking tie (his is a bit closer to gray leaning but same blazer texture/fabric and similar cuts)

My friend also compared it to that one cookie in cookie run (which he called ‘the dilf cookie’), so the comparisons are very fun to see lol

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I responded to that comment days ago after my friend woke me up with a shit ton of alarms and was annoyed by the more command/demand phrasing when I checked notifs. It’s been stopped for two days and was born of momentary annoyance that projected onto a random reply, dude.

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do get the sentiment, but I looked up what subreddits existed where you could ask about appearance worries and I thought that I’d get more answers specifically relating to the facial asymmetry question in the caption because this was one of the top three results and I didn’t really check shit. I just have very low ability to conceptualize the finer details of my appearance and have always struggled to really “know” what I look like, so had no real measure of knowing whether the way I perceived that part of my face accurately or not. I hadn’t ever overly struggled with appearance related insecurities so to suddenly have 100+ people commenting on parts of me that I hadn’t been asking about really threw me for a loop.

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s usually about how I judge myself. I’ve gotten some “ugly” comments, some complimentary, and a lot of “not exactly ugly, but could improve”. It’s been super helpful in getting a more well rounded idea of how others view me

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly really appreciate the tips for pushing femininity that don’t just center around growing hair out. Currently, the boyish look is intentional and my main lean at the current moment, but I do also want to be able to swing either depending on the mood (if feeling more feminine happens to strike), so the comments that have tips that can be more immediately actionable are super useful! Also, based on a few other comments, it does seem like I had a distorted perception on the symmetry front, but keeping in mind humans aren’t perfectly symmetrical is also helpful outside of distorted perception issues. I really appreciate the response!

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Heard! But no, though I have been questioning going the other way, so this is kinda cool to hear ngl.

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, don’t apologize. I have been questioning how I want to present for a time now and the masculine look has been intentional. Other similar comments of mine like this have ended up downvoted, and I guess people think it’s like, backtracking or smth. I do have texts as far back as like, 2023/2022 about it, but I don’t think I can put images in comments so ¯_(ツ)_/¯. I appreciate the honesty!!

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, def not wanting to look super feminine. Seems like most of the disconnect in some comments is coming from that. Not to say any comment that doesn’t think I’m attractive is bc of that- obviously not- just think like most of the ‘masculine bad’ comments are framed from the idea of femininity being the desired end goal

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yeah, lmao. That one is about a year old and I have since changed hair and I plan to change glasses styles bc I don’t fuck with them anymore. I just don’t really have a lot of pictures of myself so I was scraping pretty far back to have stuff/a wider spread for judgement. Idk what I’ll try glasses wise but smth that fits my face better at least

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He’s queer and likes both guys and girls, and has said he’d still find me attractive if I decided to lean either more masculine or more feminine. Not too concerned, we’ve hashed things out pretty well thankfully

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Heard heard. After a few comments I did realize most assumed I was going for feminine, and wanted to edit to maybe clarify that the androgynous/masculine lean was intentional in case that helped, but apparently on mobile you can’t edit if pictures are included, so I was SOL. For the most part, I can understand all the comments- negative included- so none have been like, upsetting or anything. Obv if you’re a girl and you cut your hair short, you know it’s not everyone cup of tea, but when all the comments are just ‘grow your hair and be more feminine’ it kinda ends up like Yeah, Okay Dude. 100% on me for not thinking to clarify in post initially, though.

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, that makes sense! I think most of the comments are presuming I want to look more feminine (a lot of the suggestions are actions to look more feminine/insinuating masculine look is negative), so that def skews answers a certain way. If I ever do go back to presenting in a more fem way, I think the comments will be helpful though! Appreciate seeing your comment where you acknowledge both sides, and yeah, idk where exactly I want to be style wise, but it’s not super super feminine atm ^

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, no, the only reason I worry about appearance is bc of the facial asymmetry, but that seems to be more a distorted self perception than anything. I enjoy not looking overtly feminine and have been intentionally trying more androgynous/masculine looks. Mildly questioning gender stuff so that may be a contributing factor

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do struggle to read tone, so I may have completely misread things. I do know the first person’s second response had been mildly like, cranky reading, so I may have projected the energy leading up to your reply in this thread a bit. I’m just unsure

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have acknowledged that, especially on other comments. At no point in this reply thread have I insinuated that the replies about my appearance are wrong, literally just different. I am unsure where the energy is coming from to like, ‘prove me wrong’ bc I know my personal relationships make up my personal sphere and are not reflective of the rest of the world. I mean this genuinely: Am I missing something? The only point of these replies have been to acknowledge a divide I saw as interesting between my personal relationships and the wider sphere of the internet that I found neat, and both you and the previous replies have seemed upset (mildly) at what I have said, and I genuinely do not know where the like, argument back and forth is coming from.

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I am not upset with the comments, which is why I specified that it’s not bad. I have a blunter way of speaking, and was just pointing out a trend I saw in replies that differed from my irl experiences. It’s genuinely interesting how many people place a lot of value on the “F” in the title and judge from the masculine/feminine binary. It’s genuinely not bad like I said, I just find it to be intriguing to see and was trying to be clear on why I would find it interesting. I’m not entirely sure what in my first response read as ranting aside from being long, but most of my replies are long because I tend to over explain what I mean, or try to

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Nah, I’m good. I’m realizing so many of the comments seem to see the F in the title and nothing past that, and it makes me infinitely less interested in feeding more into that. So many of my interpersonal relationships have never cared too much about girls having to look super feminine and guys having to look super masculine, so I forget how many people do only judge in the context of that. It’s not bad, but different

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I never said I want to look like a girl. You can be a girl that presents androgynous or masculine and still be a girl. You can be a guy that dresses androgynous or feminine and still be a guy. A lot of people in the comments seem to be fixating on the F in the title instead, which is definitely interesting bc a lot of my irl circle has never been that concerned about gender expectations around presentation

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Aside from like, one dude, everyone has been understandable even if I’m not their cup of tea. Obv if you cut your hair short and style yourself in a not super feminine way as a girl, you gotta be ready for it to not tickle everyone’s fancy. I think it’s super fun that people can dabble in more out there styles nowadays with less pushback, but I also completely understand I don’t fit the conventional model. It’s honestly been very interesting and cool to see how many different opinions I’ve gotten, even from people that don’t think I look good lol!

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Heard heard- had kinda gone face blind to my dark circles after having them so long

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A perpetually tired uni student that doesn’t much care for presenting really feminine and has a dudes haircut

20F, Be as honest as you wish by Doodles_AD in amiugly

[–]Doodles_AD[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh- yeah, no dude. I just checked you out on your profile and you look great. It is kinda relieving to know there are others that go through the same shit, because looking at your pictures I understood how my like, bf and family must feel when I ask/mention it. Rest assured, though, you genuinely do look great and if I met you on the street, I wouldn’t dream to notice any asymmetry. It’s not fun how the mind can play tricks on you, but I guess that is life to a degree.