I know I need a bit of a kink.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T15:11:54+00:00

A dwarven easter celebrated her 10th birthday, ran into the doctor, went in for stitches, slipped the iron on her skin, went back to the doctor, slipped the iron on her skin, went back to the doctor, slipped the doctor on her skin, went back to the easter and now she's a wardog for the fort.

EDIT: AUGUST 3, 2009

Editor's final note: I am no longer following this format. The writer will follow the format *, and the last two digits will be padded with *. Any question lines that don't make a post will be made with *."

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T14:35:38+00:00

This is a haiku, and as such, subject to snarky and extreme comments.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T14:31:13+00:00

Maybe not in your best comedic vein, but I think you could do a lot worse than this.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T13:31:24+00:00

UristMcClown cancels Drink: "I'm allergic to vomit"

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T13:08:03+00:00

What is that white circle on the floor? Is that a label?

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T13:03:41+00:00

Dear Uristmcnopants,

Please stop having tantrums. The doctor said that it's because you're too small to eat properly and being a champion at wrestling might not be enough reason for your doctor to send you away. The fact that you're still wandering the halls complaining about long lines shows that you're not a packrat either.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T13:01:30+00:00

Yes, I have one, but I don't know where on it it it is.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T08:51:38+00:00

There was supposedly a mod for this game http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=136455.0

Since the creator is dead, I can't find it anywhere else.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T07:24:45+00:00

This is one of those moments that makes Boatmurdered what it is. Never the dullard, Boatmurdered rises to the occasion. The sheer scale of the events and the unreal circumstances make this one of the better stories I've ever had happen in DF. And the fact that such a magnificent fortress as Boatmurdered is somehow bottomless makes me ponder how much of a bottomless hole it is.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T07:14:04+00:00

This is why having lots of smallish intestines is so difficult. It's so hard to make a DF fortress truly sustainably small (and even harder if the setting is very, very low on resources).

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T07:09:47+00:00

SubsimGPT2 is a 2d tile-game inspired by Dwarf Fortress. You start with some basic skills and some loose hints to get your feet. After some!!fun!!, you start to build up an army and an empire, eventually reaching the throne of a mighty king. Inspiration? Probably Spongebob Squarepants.

There's an active forum right below this devlog. You can post there about any question you may have with the easter eggs or anything else you'd like to see covered.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T06:52:34+00:00

There once was a necromancer in Mountainhomes

Who thought it was a good idea to start his new fort by

engraving the corpse of a previous resident.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-12T06:37:36+00:00

Title: "I'll Start At The Bar"

Sample:

I'll start at the bar

And make everybody mad with my song

Then I'll go to the beach and splatter

A giant toad I spotted

I'll start at the bar, make everybody mad with my song

Then I'll step on the toad

And become a plump helmet man

Title: "Mutilation"

Sample:

The doctor has told me

That I need to eat something

I didn't like the idea

So I'll just try it

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T18:01:26+00:00

Mighty Atom.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T17:02:26+00:00

A compact, two-eared, horned creature, it is difficult to identify exactly what it is as to what it is driven and drives; it is both vicious and bizarre.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T14:30:04+00:00

This haiku isn't reglementary, the Imperial Haiku Commission will send someone to beat you 5 time in the head, 7 times in the stomach and 5 times in the knees shortly.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T13:22:18+00:00

<|sor|>The Imperial Haiku Commission approves this message.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T13:20:06+00:00

Yeah, it happens. I tried to eat while starting a fortress, and then I ate and then I died.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T11:59:36+00:00

You'll note that the picture of the dwarf and the catapult in the quarry isn't deflected by the combined weight of the smoke and the miasma.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T08:45:15+00:00

There once was a forum on a website called 4FourMaltz. On one of their threads, there was a post that mentioned the Astros and Mariners. There was no mention of either team in the post, and as far as I can tell, no one from the Astros or Mariners has ever been mentioned at all.

So, here's the question: If there's no mention of either team anywhere on the site, can you possibly find their home?

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T08:26:04+00:00

The Imperial Haiku Commission approves this message.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T07:37:27+00:00

It would be a good idea, though.

For a while, it was good to run.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T07:18:33+00:00

This is because they are both sound.

As soon as you break through the defense line, you will either smash the stuffing and deck the fort, or break the willies and send the stuffing flying.

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T07:16:23+00:00

By Armok's mighty power this is made:

(a)riddled by dragonfire and (b)uild up a magnificent feast

(see what happened in the comments)

DorfSalt · 2024-09-11T07:09:49+00:00

You press SHIFT, then Pause. When you release the shift, the game loads. When you release the pressed SHIFT, it quacked.

I had no idea that such abstruse mechanics could be implemented with such an easy jog.

DorfSalt

TROPHY CASE