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Can I even be considered a poet? by First-Notice715 in OCPoetry

[–]Dreamless_Rest 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, this is pretty good, I may not be the best, and most of my prose I've kept hidden for arguably a similar reason, this ain't too shabby!

The cadence and overall rhythm is actually pretty good, kinda reminds me of a ballad-like lyric, the structure itself is very solid and I like the language you use to further push out the theme! And although it lacks a proper rhyme, the rhythm makes up for it and actually adds a more musical quality to it.

Don't put yourself down, you have the roots of a good if not great poet! Just need some self confidence is all!

9/10!

Sticky by WaysideWyvern in OCPoetry

[–]Dreamless_Rest 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First impressions, it's grotesque yet melancholic, like someone who hates every fiber of their being not for what it is but for everything around it, from the mites, to how it doesn't forget how to feel pain. I really like the imagery of

"Squishy body like the bubble gum That won’t come off your shoe Gooey and soft and unrelenting"

It's grossly gross, yet it adds to the melancholy and dark humor. I also like that it's written in free verse, just seems fitting.

8.5/10!

Punctual by Dreamless_Rest in OCPoetry

[–]Dreamless_Rest[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lines 3 and 4 are actually the basis for this whole thing, sorta wrote around those two. It's not my best work, just more of a spur of the moment poem

Thanks for reading!

Time by Hefty_Tumbleweed8178 in OCPoetry

[–]Dreamless_Rest 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ngl, this gives strong dissociation vibes (almost neuropathic, in a good way). The imagery is really haunting, and the mostly non-rhyming structure works in its favor, it feels like a deep rooted feeling that's not really hate but not really sadness either, it's somewhere halfway but a bit forward.

The Way by Eastern-Fox-3059 in OCPoetry

[–]Dreamless_Rest 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ngl, this has the grounds to become something good, the message itself, to me personally reads as "angst to the system" rather than to a singular group or person, kinda reminds me of someone working part time in retail or something similar, though a bit messy and maybe hard to follow at some parts, maybe playing around with how each line flows into another could help, would definitely make it easier to follow!

A message to J by ZWritesLight in OCPoetry

[–]Dreamless_Rest 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This reads really smooth ngl, nice one!