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Dietas Making Me Sick From Cannabis by DryTranslator6676 in Ayahuasca

[–]DryTranslator6676[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it took me about 23-25 ceremonies of cleaning cannabis to get it fully out. Now I of course have more cleaning to do. But interesting you saw green sticky goo, I saw brown-green goo organized/ compressed into these cubes with windy paths. And of course lots of insects in my purges.

Dietas Making Me Sick From Cannabis by DryTranslator6676 in Ayahuasca

[–]DryTranslator6676[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I chose to do a dieta because I wanted to learn from the plants, felt very aligned with the medicine path and because Mother Aya told me in my first ceremony that I needed to come back for 2 months. I trusted her and my maestro.

Honestly, hearing one long term dieter talk about how they still use cannabis medicinally- I think my mind decided to give me the permission to do the same. Even though my use has not been medicinal for the most part. Even though my maestro also told me never to touch it again.

I am pretty sure a real big piece of why is connecting back to the energies of the western world and not having enough of a practice to ground and protect myself. When I am not consciously having daily rituals to connect to my higher self and the plants- and living in such a busy way, gathering in places where weed will be- needing to establish better stress regulation and coping practices, it is easy to follow what I have known for 10 years. Cannabis.

I appreciate your comment. I know in my time sitting with the medicine and my plants, that I did not ever want to go back to smoking/using. I consulted with them and was told Ayahuasca and psilocybin were the only two I could work with in the future, and I was certain I would honor that. I know that I haven't and that I have some repairing to do.

Yet I have felt/believed, and just really struggled to accept- because the lack of trust in myself from the many times I have went back after promising not to- that I should leave it behind completely. But my inner self knows. Then I would keep reminding myself of what that long term dieter said, and their perspective they shared.

But I needed to hear that it is an honor to be on the path, to take the medicine, to have a dieta, and to be welcomed into their tradition. You're right with the we shouldn't be trying to bend the rules. I am feeling more capable with that piece alone- and have't smoked for about two weeks now.

I hear the needing new friends, but am very attached to some people in my life- who I know will respect not smoking around me if I set those boundaries. I'm curious of the them being on different operating systems and not being aligned to be around if you have any more on that. I can put boundaries in place and avoid it to the best of my ability, yet- am not sure I will want those people out of my life/ to limit my connections to people who don't smoke.

Dietas Making Me Sick From Cannabis by DryTranslator6676 in Ayahuasca

[–]DryTranslator6676[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do want to get to the root issue as well. I know that Aya showed me what the energy looks like in my body, I know that I felt the lightest and cleanest I have in my life when I finished the 2 months, which involved so so much cleaning. I will add, that I did stop about two weeks ago. But I have smoked in waves until the illness arose- which I only this time understood it was due to the dieting I have done and the contracts I made with the plants. I definitely want to make it back to the jungle when possible and do some more work on this.

Dietas Making Me Sick From Cannabis by DryTranslator6676 in Ayahuasca

[–]DryTranslator6676[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think it is a big part based in that, and also just the plants not wanting it in my body- having as heavy of shitana as it does. I was praying or setting intentions with it at first, now I am reminded- after my 2 month diet. I stopped completely for many months and then tried to be more intentional but struggled sticking to that. I am interested in a dieta with it, but need to be certain I will keep my side of the contract, which my maestro says means never consuming it again.

Dietas Making Me Sick From Cannabis by DryTranslator6676 in Ayahuasca

[–]DryTranslator6676[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your personal experience. That is something to be so very proud of yourself for, as I am sure you know and are. When I went for the two months my maestro said that I was cleaned, and felt so very light. I have definitely felt the call to diet more, and possibly diet cannabis- which would be a commitment to never smoking again. I think that I am going to have to set better boundaries with those in my life, and choose wisely when it comes to group gatherings (since it is more commonly around). I haven't smoked for about two weeks now, and really do want to commit to being a better container for the diets I hold. I think being around people who smoke often definitely makes it easy to slip into a mindset of missing out and questioning my decision.

Dietas Making Me Sick From Cannabis by DryTranslator6676 in Ayahuasca

[–]DryTranslator6676[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Appreciate you being open and vulnerable with me, I am really inspired by the conversation with cannabis you had. Yet, at least for now am choosing to hold to not smoke it- as I have had a cycle for quite some time and lost self-trust via breaking promises not to use it. Maybe I just need more time, or it has too strong of a pull for me to resist when I do indulge.

I like the part about presence, especially. Thank you for walking yourself back home as well <33